Large amount of unexpected cuts

[QueenD]

Originally Posted by carnation

My niece rushed at a medium-sized university with 5 sororities. Normally, she would've had great returns but she was a legacy to 1 group--that chapter as well--and she was only asked back to 2 groups for the rest of recruitment. And Panhellenic released pictures of the PNMs every day and there she was on the second day, huddled in her chair and waiting for her party.

Yes, she pledged her legacy group but I bet she would've liked another shot at meeting girls from the 3 that cut her immediately.

I know you mean well, but you actually don't know whether your niece would have had better returns if she were not a legacy or if other chapters didn't know of her legacy status.

That said, I also advocate only telling the legacy house of you status and leaving it off the Panhellenic registration.

[carnation]

Originally Posted by QueenD

I know you mean well, but you actually don't know whether your niece would have had better returns if she were not a legacy or if other chapters didn't know of her legacy status.

That said, I also advocate only telling the legacy house of you status and leaving it off the Panhellenic registration.

Oh, they knew. She was an in-house legacy and her sister, a year older, was a well-known dance team member on campus plus her cousin (my daughter) was also in the chapter.

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by carnation

Oh, they knew. She was an in-house legacy and her sister, a year older, was a well-known dance team member on campus plus her cousin (my daughter) was also in the chapter.

Wait, I'm confused. I feel like I read QueenD's comment differently.

[carnation]

Originally Posted by QueenD

I know you mean well, but you actually don't know whether your niece would have had better returns if she were not a legacy or if other chapters didn't know of her legacy status.

ASTAlum, it seems that she thought that the other chapters didn't know she was an in-house legacy to a chapter. Knowing this campus (5 sororities, moderate Greek presence) I--and many other local Greeks who knew her--were positive she would've had a fuller experience had they not known. As a matter of fact, her sister and cousin were the main focus of conversation in every house she walked into.

This girl had all that they wanted in a PNM--top grades and activities, attractiveness, and a very good rep. This campus is not UGa where 95% of the PNMs have it all.

[QueenD]

Originally Posted by carnation

ASTAlum, it seems that she thought that the other chapters didn't know she was an in-house legacy to a chapter. Knowing this campus (5 sororities, moderate Greek presence) I--and many other local Greeks who knew her--were positive she would've had a fuller experience had they not known. As a matter of fact, her sister and cousin were the main focus of conversation in every house she walked into.

This girl had all that they wanted in a PNM--top grades and activities, attractiveness, and a very good rep. This campus is not UGa where 95% of the PNMs have it all.

This is the exact opposite of what I meant. I meant that you have no idea whether this young woman's legacy status has impacted her invitations. You aren't sitting in their membership selection sessions. It might make you and your niece feel better to tell yourselves she'd have more houses still on her list if it wasn't know she is a legacy, but ultimately you don't know if this is the case.

[carnation]

I do know what happened with her with at least 2 of the sororities because members angrily shared. They had wanted her but other members insisted with the limited amount of invitations they had, they didn't need to be "wasting" them on in-house legacies. I also know from a member of one group there that her Hispanic sister and her Asian cousin were cut the year before because some members argued that "they're black and they wouldn't fit in this chapter". The Asian cousin was my own Southeast Asian daughter. Several members were so upset that they called us because they wanted her but I told them that the girls would've had a bad time anyway in a chapter where some of the sisters rejected them because of skin color. I did ask the girls to share it with their higher-ups.

There is a myth that no members share membership selection information at all; that we are all close-lipped. On the contrary, I have heard what has gone on in several membership selection sessions of other sororities, usually because one or more members is outraged at what went down.

[QueenD]

Originally Posted by carnation

I do know what happened with her with at least 2 of the sororities because members angrily shared. They had wanted her but other members insisted with the limited amount of invitations they had, they didn't need to be "wasting" them on in-house legacies. I also know from a member of one group there that her Hispanic sister and her Asian cousin were cut the year before because some members argued that "they're black and they wouldn't fit in this chapter". The Asian cousin was my own Southeast Asian daughter. Several members were so upset that they called us because they wanted her but I told them that the girls would've had a bad time anyway in a chapter where some of the sisters rejected them because of skin color. I did ask the girls to share it with their higher-ups.

There is a myth that no members share membership selection information at all; that we are all close-lipped. On the contrary, I have heard what has gone on in several membership selection sessions of other sororities, usually because one or more members is outraged at what went down.

I never said that members never share membership selection information. I said that you don't know for sure. Women who are sad that their rush crush or future little sister got cut by the chapter share things all day long about why they *think* someone was cut, or what discussion was during sessions. All of it is to be taken with a grain of salt by the people outside the chapter who are hearing it since in pretty much every case there are multiple factors. On the flip side, i feel that disclosing MS discussion details should be taken extremely seriously within the chapter from a standards perspective. It is 100% unacceptable to discuss this outside sessions.

[carnation]

I do know for sure.

[QueenD]

Originally Posted by carnation

I do know for sure.

WOW! How did you find yourself sitting in MS for multiple NPC sororities at the same time?

If you were not a super moderator, I'd swear you were trolling.

[Sen's Revenge]

Originally Posted by carnation

There is a myth that no members share membership selection information at all; that we are all close-lipped. On the contrary, I have heard what has gone on in several membership selection sessions of other sororities, usually because one or more members is outraged at what went down.

I am not certain whether I ever shared this on GC, because I often type it but then delete it because I didn't want to out the girl, but...

One of my interns, several years and many jobs ago, was a sorority member at an SEC school.

We had frank conversations about race and she said that she knew a fact that her sorority would not pledge a black girl.

She said she wouldn't personally want to put the girl in a position where she'd have a miserable time.

She talked around the elephant in the room, which was that there were racists in her chapter.

HOPEFULLY I was able to drop a nugget of wisdom about the problem with being a bystander to racism. It's not noble to be silent in the face of prejudice.

People of color need to be able to trust that the white people in their lives will call out shenanigans in membership selection.