I didn't get my first choice - it gets better.

[BCPM]

I have not read through all the posts, and I am new here, I'm not going through rush, nor recruitment, and I've never been in a Sorority, but I'm a mom of a young lady who did a number of years ago and what to share from a mom's perspective..

Even before she went off to college she knew she wanted to "Rush" and be apart of something bigger than herself, and wanted to be in a Sorority, she even had in her 'mind' what Sororities she wanted to be a part.

She started her Freshman year during the summer, and had an opportunity to meet sisters of various houses, even many who were 'disaffiliated' during that time--based on those who had not disaffiliated' she made presumptions and had her own preconceived notions about what 'house' was best and what houses these others young ladies 'must be part of."

Come Fall Semester she and her roommate 'rushed' and both had their minds set on 'just what Sorority" they wanted to belong. As "Rush" week goes they were invited back to some and not others--the some they were invited back to wasn't always the one's they had in mind. In the end they were both invited back to one house, not their 'first, second or even third choice" and my daughter called home 'crying' to me that the houses she wanted 'didn't want her' and her roommate did the same with her mother. As Parents, we asked "Does it matter?" In the grand scheme of things, you wanted to be a part of this sisterhood, and you have met many young ladies that you do not even KNOW what house they belong to, and I think YOU will be very surprised to find out...it will be some of those who will be in the house you least expect. Do not prejudge them when you do not even know them, just as you do not like to be 'prejudged' when someone does not know you. So go, and at least check out this house and get to know these "Sisters as people, as individuals and as Sisters"

She joined and was accepted at that house, and found out just what I had told her was true, that those women she 'presumed' were part of another house (based on their looks), were actually from the house she was invited to join, and these women have become her best friends, and she has learned not to judge a person based on looks, clothes, and hair styles.

Since being a member of this house she has spent a summer disaffiliated and others have done the same with her, assumed she was part of a certain house because of her 'looks, style and personality' and they too spent time crying to their mothers, that 'they thought these women were their friends, and how could they not invite them back to 'their house'. She had even told these young women during recruitment,

"Do not assume we belong to a 'certain house' because like me, you too will be surprised by the house we are apart of, and it may or may not be what you 'think'. So if you get an invitation to a house, even if it's not your 'first, second, or third choice' give it a chance--because someone in that house see's something in you that others may have overlooked, and they see it and thus want you for their sister for life."

She will soon be graduating from college, and will miss her sisters greatly, not just those in her own house, but the sisters she has made over the years who belong to other houses as well, and she will also miss her brothers in the Fraternities. She has come to see that being Greek is not just about "your house being a family" but the entire Greek Community is Her extended FAMILY.

Turns out some of her friends she's made along the way who are part of her first choice's told her the reason she wasn't accepted by their house's was her 'hair was to short', but what they did not know was this: she had it cut right before Fall Semester for donation to be made into a "Wig" for those who have lost their hair due to cancer or other diseases. A family friend had lost her hair due to alopecia and asked if she would be willing to help, other friends were shaving their heads for the cause, but she just had a portion of hers cut to help since she didn't want to go back to school 'bald'.

Those sororities and the "they don't meet our criteria, because they don't have hair this long or this color" lost out on having a really great sister, one who was willing to donate not just her time, but a part of herself, her hair, to help a friend and a cause that was important to her...those in the other Sororities who have gotten to know her over the 4 years she's been there..now believe she would have made a great addition to their own homes, and wish she was part of their sorority..some of them still don't know the reason her hair was short during recruitment, but it doesn't matter, she found her home and has been happy there.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by BCPM

Turns out some of her friends she's made along the way who are part of her first choice's told her the reason she wasn't accepted by their house's was her 'hair was to short', but what they did not know was this: she had it cut right before Fall Semester for donation to be made into a "Wig" for those who have lost their hair due to cancer or other diseases. A family friend had lost her hair due to alopecia and asked if she would be willing to help, other friends were shaving their heads for the cause, but she just had a portion of hers cut to help since she didn't want to go back to school 'bald'.

Those sororities and the "they don't meet our criteria, because they don't have hair this long or this color" lost out on having a really great sister, one who was willing to donate not just her time, but a part of herself, her hair, to help a friend and a cause that was important to her...those in the other Sororities who have gotten to know her over the 4 years she's been there..now believe she would have made a great addition to their own homes, and wish she was part of their sorority..some of them still don't know the reason her hair was short during recruitment, but it doesn't matter, she found her home and has been happy there.

WTF?

[AZTheta]

Originally Posted by BCPM

I have not read through all the posts, and I am new here, I'm not going through rush, nor recruitment, and I've never been in a Sorority, but I'm a mom of a young lady who did a number of years ago and what to share from a mom's perspective..

Even before she went off to college she knew she wanted to "Rush" and be apart of something bigger than herself, and wanted to be in a Sorority, she even had in her 'mind' what Sororities she wanted to be a part.

She started her Freshman year during the summer, and had an opportunity to meet sisters of various houses, even many who were 'disaffiliated' during that time--based on those who had not disaffiliated' she made presumptions and had her own preconceived notions about what 'house' was best and what houses these others young ladies 'must be part of."

Come Fall Semester she and her roommate 'rushed' and both had their minds set on 'just what Sorority" they wanted to belong. As "Rush" week goes they were invited back to some and not others--the some they were invited back to wasn't always the one's they had in mind. In the end they were both invited back to one house, not their 'first, second or even third choice" and my daughter called home 'crying' to me that the houses she wanted 'didn't want her' and her roommate did the same with her mother. As Parents, we asked "Does it matter?" In the grand scheme of things, you wanted to be a part of this sisterhood, and you have met many young ladies that you do not even KNOW what house they belong to, and I think YOU will be very surprised to find out...it will be some of those who will be in the house you least expect. Do not prejudge them when you do not even know them, just as you do not like to be 'prejudged' when someone does not know you. So go, and at least check out this house and get to know these "Sisters as people, as individuals and as Sisters"

She joined and was accepted at that house, and found out just what I had told her was true, that those women she 'presumed' were part of another house (based on their looks), were actually from the house she was invited to join, and these women have become her best friends, and she has learned not to judge a person based on looks, clothes, and hair styles.

Since being a member of this house she has spent a summer disaffiliated and others have done the same with her, assumed she was part of a certain house because of her 'looks, style and personality' and they too spent time crying to their mothers, that 'they thought these women were their friends, and how could they not invite them back to 'their house'. She had even told these young women during recruitment,

"Do not assume we belong to a 'certain house' because like me, you too will be surprised by the house we are apart of, and it may or may not be what you 'think'. So if you get an invitation to a house, even if it's not your 'first, second, or third choice' give it a chance--because someone in that house see's something in you that others may have overlooked, and they see it and thus want you for their sister for life."

She will soon be graduating from college, and will miss her sisters greatly, not just those in her own house, but the sisters she has made over the years who belong to other houses as well, and she will also miss her brothers in the Fraternities. She has come to see that being Greek is not just about "your house being a family" but the entire Greek Community is Her extended FAMILY.

Turns out some of her friends she's made along the way who are part of her first choice's told her the reason she wasn't accepted by their house's was her 'hair was to short', but what they did not know was this: she had it cut right before Fall Semester for donation to be made into a "Wig" for those who have lost their hair due to cancer or other diseases. A family friend had lost her hair due to alopecia and asked if she would be willing to help, other friends were shaving their heads for the cause, but she just had a portion of hers cut to help since she didn't want to go back to school 'bald'.

Those sororities and the "they don't meet our criteria, because they don't have hair this long or this color" lost out on having a really great sister, one who was willing to donate not just her time, but a part of herself, her hair, to help a friend and a cause that was important to her...those in the other Sororities who have gotten to know her over the 4 years she's been there..now believe she would have made a great addition to their own homes, and wish she was part of their sorority..some of them still don't know the reason her hair was short during recruitment, but it doesn't matter, she found her home and has been happy there.

Sorry - something about this doesn't ring true. It has something to do with the added paragraphs and the ellipses. Your initial post was all right but then you came back and added those paragraphs about why your daughter did not get her first choice. And that's where it went off the rails for me. Just sayin'.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by AZTheta

Sorry - something about this doesn't ring true.

"Wig"