Dorm Shower...is that a thing now?

[lovespink88]

I have never, EVER, heard of this. Please do not think this is something that we (meaning my generation--because I think I still share a generation with today's 18 year olds?) all think we're entitled to.

I'm so sick of hearing how spoiled and entitled we are. We are not all that bad. Kind of a tangent from your question, sorry, lol

ETA: Is it bad that when I read the thread title I was concerned because I thought "um, what dorms DON'T have showers?". Hey, it's Monday...

[BraveMaroon]

Originally Posted by lovespink88

I'm so sick of hearing how spoiled and entitled we are. We are not all that bad. Kind of a tangent from your question, sorry, lol

No, no - this was not about being spoiled/entitled...I don't mean to generalize.

She's a good kid, but the only child of two very well-meaning but overprotective parents - who are no doubt freaking out about their precious girl going away for the first time.

I just didn't know if this was a new trend and I hadn't gotten the memo.

[lovespink88]

Originally Posted by BraveMaroon

No, no - this was not about being spoiled/entitled...I don't mean to generalize.

She's a good kid, but the only child of two very well-meaning but overprotective parents - who are no doubt freaking out about their precious girl going away for the first time.

I just didn't know if this was a new trend and I hadn't gotten the memo.

Sorry!! I realized after I hit submit that it sounded like that was directed at you. I did not feel like you were generalizing, at all! I was just pre-emptively defending myself as a part of this generation in case anyone did make a generalizing statement, lol

I think I'm also sensitive after just hearing overhearing a new client request not to have some "snot-nosed, fresh out of college" kid working on his account. As someone who is fresh-ish out of college, I was quite offended. I work hard at what I have do and learned a lot about my industry in 3 years. I still have lots to learn and I am always actively trying to learn from my superiors but I would have been able to manage this guys account just fine.

/rant

Anywho, yes, I think dorm showers are weird. I had a graduation party after high school. People were kind enough to give monetary and a few actual fun dorm things (i.e. picture frames, whiteboard, etc). I used the money to help furnish my dorm.

Did this young woman have a graduation party as well?

[amIblue?]

Puh-lease. That's just a tacky present grab, and kind of even tackier that the mom is hosting it.

[AnchorAlumna]

Oh, I don't know.
If Snowflake did not have a graduation party or send out graduation invitations, I think it would be OK. But if people gave her grad presents, it's take to turn around a few weeks later and ask for more stuff.

If Snowflake and Snow Queen Mama are as particular as we speculate, I'm surprised Mama isn't coordinating everything to match...or hiring an interior designer to do that.

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

Oh, I don't know.
If Snowflake did not have a graduation party or send out graduation invitations, I think it would be OK. But if people gave her grad presents, it's take to turn around a few weeks later and ask for more stuff.

Agreed...definitely not both. I've never heard of this kind of party, though. Sounds like one of those "invented" events cooked up by a commercial vendor who stands to profit (like Bed, Bath and Beyond. Just like Hallmark and the floral industry promoting Sweetest Day, Grandparents Day, etc., etc.)

I think it's understood that the graduation party money is *theoretically* supposed to go to college start-up costs: laptop, dorm needs, etc. Many view it as a gift grab, if the invitations are spread too wide, but at least there's the "right of passage" celebration aspect. This feels tacky to me.

Also, Facebook invitation?? They couldn't even spring for a stamp?

[adpiucf]

I was invited to a housewarming/"stock the bar" party recently. I also felt this was tacky. I think any time people "expect" gifts it is tacky, but in our society, gifts are expected when you go through a rite of passage. It's also become acceptable for the recipient to dictate what gifts they will accept.

As a single (clearly that makes me bitter, right? LOL) woman, I am broke from all of these various "showers" and I'm not looking to graduate from anywhere, buy a home, get married, or have a baby any time soon. Nor can I simply ignore these gift-seeking invitations because then I'm the rude one!

[adpiucf]

Originally Posted by amIblue?

Puh-lease. That's just a tacky present grab, and kind of even tackier that the mom is hosting it.

No tackier than a baby shower or a bridal shower.

[amIblue?]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

No tackier than a baby shower or a bridal shower.

I'm afraid we'll have to agree to disagree on that one. My daughter is starting kindergarten this fall. She needs a bunch of school supplies and school clothes, for that matter. Should I host a back to school shower for her?

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by amIblue?

I'm afraid we'll have to agree to disagree on that one. My daughter is starting kindergarten this fall. She needs a bunch of school supplies and school clothes, for that matter. Should I host a back to school shower for her?

LOL...I dare you to do this!

[adpiucf]

Originally Posted by amIblue?

I'm afraid we'll have to agree to disagree on that one. My daughter is starting kindergarten this fall. She needs a bunch of school supplies and school clothes, for that matter. Should I host a back to school shower for her?

I'm sorry. I should have been more clear. I'm agreeing with you. I think that all of these "showers" are ridiculous gift-grubbing shows, and your example is spot-on because it points out: why should we outfit your baby and not your kindergartener? The showers need to stop.

[IndianaSigKap]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

No tackier than a baby shower or a bridal shower.

//swerve//

I was just ranting about this to a sorority sister on Saturday night. I received a baby shower invitation from a distant relative who is having her third child in less than 6 years. She has one of each already, so she does not need gender specific items nor infant most infant needs other than diapers. I am tired of this entitlement of "I am having a baby buy me things". Showers were intended to help first time parents out by giving them a head start on setting up the nursery.

And while I am ranting, full blown bridal showers for third time brides. Really? You didn't get enough items during the first two marriages? I have no problem with an engagement party to celebrate the couple or a bachelorette party to give the bride one last wild night out, but having a bridal shower? Again, bridal showers were designed to help newly married couples set up households with essentials. If you have been married multiple times, and your spouse to be has too, then you both already have households to merge.

//back into the lane

[amIblue?]

Originally Posted by IndianaSigKap

//swerve//

I was just ranting about this to a sorority sister on Saturday night. I received a baby shower invitation from a distant relative who is having her third child in less than 6 years. She has one of each already, so she does not need gender specific items nor infant most infant needs other than diapers. I am tired of this entitlement of "I am having a baby buy me things". Showers were intended to help first time parents out by giving them a head start on setting up the nursery.

And while I am ranting, full blown bridal showers for third time brides. Really? You didn't get enough items during the first two marriages? I have no problem with an engagement party to celebrate the couple or a bachelorette party to give the bride one last wild night out, but having a bridal shower? Again, bridal showers were designed to help newly married couples set up households with essentials. If you have been married multiple times, and your spouse to be has too, then you both already have households to merge.

//back into the lane

I totally agree with you. I dont mind showers for first babies or first weddings. I'm not cool with second, third or whatever of either variety. My only exception is perhaps a late in life oopsie baby. Because at that point, you probably really don't have any hand me downs available.

I also think the idea of bringing something you couldn't do without in the dorm is cute. Calling something a shower is just flat out a request for gifts.