Dorm Shower...is that a thing now?

[33girl]

If I had been invited to a "dorm shower" I think I would have printed out the thread where Titchou, me and some others talk about how to drink in college, handed it to the guest of honor with a box of Alka-Seltzer, and walked out. Seriously, if you have already blown your graduation $$$ that's your own stupid fault. It makes it seem like someone going away to college is deserving of more than someone who's staying at home and commuting, or someone who's immediately starting work.

This topic brings a tear to my eye, making me think of my mom and I sitting and picking out my sheets and towels in the Sears catalog. I miss my mom.

What about the Good Stuff boxes in the dorms? Do they still have those?

Re housewarmings, well-bred people usually bring food or booze without it having to be stated. That's a given.

As far as showers for non-first time brides or moms, it really depends on the situation. My old roommate is getting married again next fall and the other bridesmaids and I probably will throw her a shower, simply because 1) she pretty much got nothing in the divorce, not that there was a lot there in the first place 2) she never had any shower or big wedding the first time around. I can't think of anything that makes me smile more than the thought of getting her nice matching towels and a gravy boat.

[WCsweet<3]

I've never heard of a dorm shower. Gifts aren't necessarily given at grad parties either and the gifts that are given were gift cards and smaller checks. I wrinkle my nose at the idea of dorm showers.

Somewhat on subject, does one bring a gift to a bachelorette party? I'm going to one next weekend and then a shower for the couple the weekend after.

On a side note: I also thought this was about showers in a dorm and was a little worried by what I might find in this thread. Something about parties in dorm showers or something similar.

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

Somewhat on subject, does one bring a gift to a bachelorette party? I'm going to one next weekend and then a shower for the couple the weekend after.

Something off-color and tongue-in-cheek...wedding night gag gifts.

[BraveMaroon]

Originally Posted by Sciencewoman

Something off-color and tongue-in-cheek...wedding night gag gifts.

Heh, tongue. Heh.


And sorry for the misleading "Shower" title. Couldn't think of a better way to put it.

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by BraveMaroon

Heh, tongue. Heh.


And sorry for the misleading "Shower" title. Couldn't think of a better way to put it.

Makes perfect sense if you think about it. Since I had never heard of it, my mind went to a more familiar idea.

[Katmandu]

Gift grab. I don't care how "nice" someone is, it is an odd scenario. I have also noticed lately that moms, sisters and grandmas are hosting showers for the Bride/Mama to be. I thought that was tacky too, but some friends have made no bones about it..."giving a shower for darling , hope you can make it!"

[aephi alum]

The first thing that popped into my mind when I saw the title of this thread was my school's "Freshman Shower Night" tradition. On the night before the first freshman physics exam, the sophomores and up in each living group would seek out the freshmen on the floor and toss them, fully clothed, into the shower. (I planned ahead and wore a bathing suit. As a result, I was tossed into a COLD shower. LOL!)

Anyway - a "dorm shower", to me, is just a gift grab. AFAIC, the tradition of a bridal shower for a first-time bride and a baby shower for a first-time mom is fine - you need stuff to set up your new household and you need things for the baby, respectively. But bridal showers for second-time brides, and baby showers for second and subsequent babies, are tacky IMO. A little get-together is plenty - and if people want to bring gifts, that's their choice. Same for a dorm shower - have a graduation party, and if people want to bring gifts that will be useful in dorm life (like, say, a shower caddy or memo board), that's their choice.

[DubaiSis]

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

Somewhat on subject, does one bring a gift to a bachelorette party? I'm going to one next weekend and then a shower for the couple the weekend after.

In one of my more embarrassing moments, at my pledge daughter's bachelorette party, I showed up with a box full of naughties, stuff I considered de rigueur for a bachelorette, and everyone else showed up with gifts more appropriately given at a Sunday afternoon tea. So me, the prude of the universe looked like a complete perv. AWESOME. KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE!!!

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

In one of my more embarrassing moments, at my pledge daughter's bachelorette party, I showed up with a box full of naughties, stuff I considered de rigueur for a bachelorette, and everyone else showed up with gifts more appropriately given at a Sunday afternoon tea. So me, the prude of the universe looked like a complete perv. AWESOME. KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE!!!

This is what I'm worried about. I know the groom better than the bride. In fact I've never hung out with the bride outside of our group/without the groom. I don't know any of the other people attending. I was actually surprised that I was invited in the first place.

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

This is what I'm worried about. I know the groom better than the bride. In fact I've never hung out with the bride outside of our group/without the groom. I don't know any of the other people attending. I was actually surprised that I was invited in the first place.

There's a really funny, cute book called "Porn for Women" that would be perfect. It's a picture book with a photo of a cute guy on each page and a speech bubble, with the guys saying things like, "I think we better leave early for the craft fair this Sunday. It might be extra busy with the Super Bowl on."

It's cute because it's classy, yet fits with the theme. I saw on Barnes and Noble that there's also a Porn for Brides, by the same publisher. It looks cute, too.

[Still BLUTANG]

Originally Posted by Sciencewoman

There's a really funny, cute book called "Porn for Women" that would be perfect. It's a picture book with a photo of a cute guy on each page and a speech bubble, with the guys saying things like, "I think we better leave early for the craft fair this Sunday. It might be extra busy with the Super Bowl on."

It's cute because it's classy, yet fits with the theme. I saw on Barnes and Noble that there's also a Porn for Brides, by the same publisher. It looks cute, too.

evey year i look forward to the new PFW calendar.

[Kevin]

There should be two showers in your life and two showers only: baby showers and wedding showers.

Anything else is excessive. If you're a proud parent, throw a reception. Many of my wife's students' parents throw receptions when they graduate HS. I never have seen a dorm shower and wouldn't go to one if invited. It seems tacky.

[thetalady]

If you do attend, nothing says that you have to bring a gift off the approved list. When my youngest
sister went to school, I bought her a pretty pink tool box. I filled it with sample sizes of Tylenol,
Benedryl, Neosporin, Alka Seltzer, alcohol swabs, Q Tips, condoms, Band Aids, Vit C, toothpaste, etc.
All the stuff you used to raid from your parent's medicine cabinet when you were't feeling good,
except maybe for the condoms! Decorated it with silly medical stickers

[DubaiSis]

I think dollar dances are horrifying. I had one at my own wedding, but the money raised was not worth the embarrassment of the grubbing for money.

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I think dollar dances are horrifying. I had one at my own wedding, but the money raised was not worth the embarrassment of the grubbing for money.

Agreed.

When my husband and I were planning our wedding, I lurked on alt.wedding (raise your hand if you remember Usenet - LOL), and the topic of dollar dances came up from time to time. The general consensus was that it was tacky. My take on it was, "Guests pay a dollar to dance with me? What am I, a bride or a cheap whore?" I danced with several of our male guests (I even danced with my mom, since my dad is a stick in the mud and refused to do a father-daughter dance) - why? - because they were our guests. Our guests had already bought us gifts, and, in many cases, had spent quite a bit of money to be there on our wedding day. To ask them for additional money to dance with the bride or groom just struck us as ... tacky.