Considering to Rush Again

[greekdee]

Originally Posted by rock5060

Why is that?

Hey -- not speaking for DeltaBetaBaby, and not judging you because I don't know the specific circumstances, but it struck me as strange that you didn't attend the funeral of someone you called a "close friend" and a "second brother." The reason you gave -- had to get back to school -- sounds weak since it is commonplace for people to rearrange plans and miss a day of school or work to attend a funeral, even for someone they wouldn't describe as a close friend. There may be a perfectly understandable and unavoidable reason for why you had to get back to school at that particular time, but without knowing why, it could make one wonder how much value you really put on the relationship with that person, or just how close you actually were. During recruitment, you can tell your story without mentioning missing the funeral. So -- don't risk being misunderstood. Just leave that part out.

[rock5060]

Originally Posted by greekdee

Hey -- not speaking for DeltaBetaBaby, and not judging you because I don't know the specific circumstances, but it struck me as strange that you didn't attend the funeral of someone you called a "close friend" and a "second brother." The reason you gave -- had to get back to school -- sounds weak since it is commonplace for people to rearrange plans and miss a day of school or work to attend a funeral, even for someone they wouldn't describe as a close friend. There may be a perfectly understandable and unavoidable reason for why you had to get back to school at that particular time, but without knowing why, it could make one wonder how much value you really put on the relationship with that person, or just how close you actually were. During recruitment, you can tell your story without mentioning missing the funeral. So -- don't risk being misunderstood. Just leave that part out.

I wanted to delay another day to attend the funeral, but he would've been pissed if I skipped school for any reason on his deathbed and fulfilled his wish. He even said that to classmates (who knew about his health situation) out on the West Coast. To make up for it, I spent the whole Spring Break comforting teammates who were with him on his deathbed. (My late friend stayed local and I was the only teammate who moved the farthest...275 miles). I won't mention this at all about missing the funeral but that was he said and I fulfilled his wish. The guy was brother/sister to all of us and a positive role model to the entire community. Whenever we had a problem, he was there for us. News of his death was like Magic Johnson announcing the world he had HIV.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by rock5060

I wanted to delay another day to attend the funeral, but he would've been pissed if I skipped school for any reason on his deathbed and fulfilled his wish. He even said that to classmates (who knew about his health situation) out on the West Coast. To make up for it, I spent the whole Spring Break comforting teammates who were with him on his deathbed. (My late friend stayed local and I was the only teammate who moved the farthest...275 miles). I won't mention this at all about missing the funeral but that was he said and I fulfilled his wish. The guy was brother/sister to all of us and a positive role model to the entire community. Whenever we had a problem, he was there for us. News of his death was like Magic Johnson announcing the world he had HIV.

Really? Sounds like you have an issue with conflating things to epic, sports proportions. Try to bring things down to a personal level. Not everything in life has to have a connection to someone famous or something important. It's okay to express your emotions and be just you and mundane. It seems more real. Using Joe Paterno instead of someone you know IRL seemed contrived as the person that had the most influence in your life just like this statement is so over the top. Was this guy even your friend or was he a popular guy on campus you want to claim? Or was it a huge blow to you that you can't express? Either way, it works much better if you drop the overblown sports metaphors and just say what you really mean.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Everyone started wearing condoms?

LOL. I was going to say they realized straight people really could get HIV.

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

Really? Sounds like you have an issue with conflating things to epic, sports proportions. Try to bring things down to a personal level.

Especially given that Magic Johnson announced he is HIV positive in 1991. If the OP is in college now, I'm guessing he has no memory of that announcement or what it was like when the announcement was made -- just what he's heard about it since then.

I do remember that announcement. While it was certainly a major news story and a shock to many people, I wouldn't put it anywhere near the same league as hearing of the death of a friend.

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by rock5060

When the question was asked, my first reaction was "oh no" because Paterno was now a controversial figure. Although I don't attend the university, I come from a community full of Penn State football fans and I learned many life lessons from the late coach. His quotes taught me the importance of confidence, studying hard to my full potential, and working together as a team. My parents, friends, and teachers all helped me influence my life in someway, but Paterno's influence connected all cylinders together. Although I feel betrayed after the scandal, I still credit him for bringing me where I am at today.

>>Did you ever meet the man? I still find it really odd for your to claim such positive influence from someone you've never met and who has been accused of covering up for someone who committed years of sexual abuse.

This may also seem strange...but the main motive of me rushing again is because of the death of my close friend back home during Spring Break and was unable to attend his funeral since I had to get back to school that day.


>>Why do stories like this always come up after the OP received answers he/she didn't want to hear?
Reflecting on his life and how he was a second brother to me and my football teammates made me miss the brotherhood developed during the rough times we faced. He also left a lasting legacy to the school because he treated everyone like a brother/sister. Because he taught me the importance of brotherhood, I want to do something to continue his legacy. The Rugby team doesn't have that brotherhood while many fraternities do on my campus.

>>So this just happened over spring break, and two weeks later, away at college where this friend didn't even attend, there is a palpable difference in the level of brotherhood in your life?

Originally Posted by rock5060

I wanted to delay another day to attend the funeral, but he would've been pissed if I skipped school for any reason on his deathbed and fulfilled his wish. He even said that to classmates (who knew about his health situation) out on the West Coast.

>>Yet others didn't follow this "wish" and attended anyway?

To make up for it, I spent the whole Spring Break comforting teammates who were with him on his deathbed.

>>I thought you said that he died during break? Now you're saying that you spent "The whole spring break" comforting teammates. If I'm misunderstanding the story, I apologize. I also am sorry for your loss, but this story is getting odder and odder.

(My late friend stayed local and I was the only teammate who moved the farthest...275 miles). I won't mention this at all about missing the funeral but that was he said and I fulfilled his wish.

>>Why are you the only person "fulfilling his wish"?

The guy was brother/sister to all of us and a positive role model to the entire community. Whenever we had a problem, he was there for us. News of his death was like Magic Johnson announcing the world he had HIV.

>>I'm not sure what that means. Do you mean he was known by millions of people?

All of this aside, there is nothing stopping you from rushing another fraternity. Like others said, you might work on your communication skills. Good luck whatever happens.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by rock5060

News of his death was like Magic Johnson announcing the world he had HIV.

Everyone started wearing condoms?