Domestic Violence

[squirrely girl]

Originally Posted by Cleveland

Honestly I don't like either of them but I feel the excessive risk they both have caused the house should give just cause for banning them both.

I'd point out this young woman, at least per what you've shared, doesn't appear to be the one doing anything to cause excessive risk to your chapter... well, other than existing. Victims of DV aren't doing something to cause the violence.

[DubaiSis]

Originally Posted by squirrely girl

I'd point out this young woman, at least per what you've shared, doesn't appear to be the one doing anything to cause excessive risk to your chapter... well, other than existing. Victims of DV aren't doing something to cause the violence.

While she may be the victim, if she's going to continue allowing it to happen (and the fool me once axiom will come into play here), she shouldn't be allowed in the house where her presence makes inherent risk of violence happening again and thus opening the chapter to risk as well. If she's going to allow it to happen, the house has to minimize their risk.

The chapter should be ashamed of themselves but 18-22 year old boys can REALLY be stupid about violence and what is/is not cool with girls. And THIS is why the collegiate chapters need advisors. Make sure the advisors know what's going on and if they don't react correctly (and bringing the hammer down is the appropriate response if what you've said is completely true), then it's time to talk to the authorities. Risk has a tendency to run downhill and if this girl should end up dead (and yes, that can be the end result of domestic abuse), or if she ends up suing the house for millions of dollars, do you know how many guys in the house could end up in deep water? ALL OF YOU.

[squirrely girl]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

While she may be the victim, if she's going to continue allowing it to happen (and the fool me once axiom will come into play here), she shouldn't be allowed in the house where her presence makes inherent risk of violence happening again and thus opening the chapter to risk as well. If she's going to allow it to happen, the house has to minimize their risk.

Her presence doesn't increase the risk of violence... the presence of the ABUSER increases the risk of violence. She's not abusing herself.

Without writing a thesis here I'll just say that by the time an abuser actually starts physically abusing within a relationship, the psychological ability for the person being abused to just leave has been so damaged it's often so profoundly difficult most non-abused folks will just never understand.