Decided to rush last minute- a couple of questions

[honeychile]

Alpha Delta Pi used to have that rule, but I think it's been removed.

As for the bucks, look at it this way: what if a bid is given to someone who truly cannot afford it? Maybe it's literally thousands of dollars, by the time housing, dues, parlor fees, etc are all counted. There may be some people better prepared to pay for the sorority experience.

And if you only knew how much I hate, hate, hate writing that, but it's a reality. Even on my campus, there was one house that was so much more expensive than the others that they basically only took legacies and the rich girls!

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by honeychile

As for the bucks, look at it this way: what if a bid is given to someone who truly cannot afford it? Maybe it's literally thousands of dollars, by the time housing, dues, parlor fees, etc are all counted. There may be some people better prepared to pay for the sorority experience.

I agree, but this is better probed in a different manner (e.g. presenting financial info and asking about any questions/concerns).

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I agree, but this is better probed in a different manner (e.g. presenting financial info and asking about any questions/concerns).

This!

Originally Posted by GeorgiaGreek

I've never thought of it as a weird question to ask. I know other people think it's tacky/taboo, and I avoid doing it myself, but I don't get offended when people ask what my parents do.

Originally Posted by honeychile

Alpha Delta Pi used to have that rule, but I think it's been removed.

As for the bucks, look at it this way: what if a bid is given to someone who truly cannot afford it? Maybe it's literally thousands of dollars, by the time housing, dues, parlor fees, etc are all counted. There may be some people better prepared to pay for the sorority experience.

And if you only knew how much I hate, hate, hate writing that, but it's a reality. Even on my campus, there was one house that was so much more expensive than the others that they basically only took legacies and the rich girls!

To ask what someone's parents do in order to find out how much money the PNM has is a flawed system. Maybe the PNM's parents have all the money in the world, but they don't intend to hand over thousands to their daughter.. or maybe the parents don't have the best jobs, but the PNM has been saving her money since the tooth fairy first left her a dollar under her pillow.. or maybe you can't really tell from their profession how much they make. Using my dad as an example - if I told you what he did for a living, you'd probably think he didn't make much money at all. But he's been with the same company for 40 years, and they definitely take care of their employees. He does VERY well. But at the same time, it's not as though he hands over any money to me.

And aside from the financial aspects, I think it's weird to bring up parents in any way, shape, or form nowadays. The nuclear family is no longer the norm. The Huxtables and Cleavers are in many ways a thing of the past. What if someone asked you what your father does, but your father ran out on you and your mother after you were born? Or what if you were asked about your mother, but she had passed away a year earlier from cancer? Or what if both of your parents just got divorced? Or what if one of them was just laid off? Or what if you were asked what your father does, but you actually have two mothers?

In addition, some people simply don't have a good a good relationship with their parents. I've had sisters that cringe at the mention of their parents. I knew of one sorority member whose father physically abused her. I had one sister whose parents tried to control everything she did, and they didn't show up to her wedding and objected to the whole thing because they didn't like her husband.. for no flippin' reason. I feel like parents/family is a topic to stay away from unless the PNM brings it up.

[SoCalGirl]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Boys, booze, bible, and bank account.

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Just go with "ballots."

We also included business (chapter business). It covered everything from "how do you pick your members?" to "Why are there more girls in the other chapters?"

[CautiousSenior]

Well, last night was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

I contacted the office of Greek life earlier in the afternoon to inquire if my marital status would be an issue. They contacted the chapter and let me know it was not an issue

So last night I ran into the arms of my sisters and had an amazing evening.

I hope you don't mind that I'm not planning on revealing my affiliation- internet privacy hyper-vigilance... it's pretty easy to figure out my school based on dates, and there aren't too many married new members running around

Thank you all for your encouragement, advice, and well wishes! I'm very excited to be part of the panhellenic community, and I am very excited to really get involved in not only the service, but in the sisterhood!

[chi-o_cat]

Congratulations! I'm so happy it worked out for you. I hope you enjoy your experience.

[KillarneyRose]

Congratulations!

[naraht]

Originally Posted by CautiousSenior

Well, last night was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

I contacted the office of Greek life earlier in the afternoon to inquire if my marital status would be an issue. They contacted the chapter and let me know it was not an issue

So last night I ran into the arms of my sisters and had an amazing evening.

I hope you don't mind that I'm not planning on revealing my affiliation- internet privacy hyper-vigilance... it's pretty easy to figure out my school based on dates, and there aren't too many married new members running around

Thank you all for your encouragement, advice, and well wishes! I'm very excited to be part of the panhellenic community, and I am very excited to really get involved in not only the service, but in the sisterhood!

Congrats!

I hope that you don't mind that your thread turned into a discussion of what not to discuss.

[CautiousSenior]

Originally Posted by naraht

Congrats!

I hope that you don't mind that your thread turned into a discussion of what not to discuss.

Not at all- it's a forum. Lane swerving and derailing the thought train are par for the course!

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by CautiousSenior

Well, last night was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

I contacted the office of Greek life earlier in the afternoon to inquire if my marital status would be an issue. They contacted the chapter and let me know it was not an issue

So last night I ran into the arms of my sisters and had an amazing evening.

I hope you don't mind that I'm not planning on revealing my affiliation- internet privacy hyper-vigilance... it's pretty easy to figure out my school based on dates, and there aren't too many married new members running around

Thank you all for your encouragement, advice, and well wishes! I'm very excited to be part of the panhellenic community, and I am very excited to really get involved in not only the service, but in the sisterhood!

Perhaps you can come back with a new username and join us. It would only be obvious to a very small number of readers, and more importantly, nobody would be able to make the connection via search.

[etadrisophila]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Perhaps you can come back with a new username and join us. It would only be obvious to a very small number of readers, and more importantly, nobody would be able to make the connection via search.

co-sign

[agzg]

Originally Posted by CautiousSenior

Not at all- it's a forum. Lane swerving and derailing the thought train are par for the course!

Finally SOMEONE gets this!

Originally Posted by CautiousSenior

Well, last night was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

I contacted the office of Greek life earlier in the afternoon to inquire if my marital status would be an issue. They contacted the chapter and let me know it was not an issue

So last night I ran into the arms of my sisters and had an amazing evening.

I hope you don't mind that I'm not planning on revealing my affiliation- internet privacy hyper-vigilance... it's pretty easy to figure out my school based on dates, and there aren't too many married new members running around

Thank you all for your encouragement, advice, and well wishes! I'm very excited to be part of the panhellenic community, and I am very excited to really get involved in not only the service, but in the sisterhood!

Congratulations to you!