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I think in the cases where they separate students at lunch they allow their friends to sit with them if they don't have peanut products. It's not like there are 5 kids at a cafeteria table by themselves eating their lunch while the rest of the cafeteria buzzes with chatter about recess. I've seen parents making sure their kid has a lunch buddy, usually one of their kid's friends.
I know when I was in elementary that the school cafeteria's offered SWAK (sealed with a kiss) as a lunch option. It was usually a pb&j with an apple or celery sticks with peanut butter and a hershey kiss. It was awesome for me because cafeteria food never resembled what it was supposed to be and I knew that it wouldn't be overcooked or seasoned with tons of salt. I never understood kids fascinations with the mashed potatoes that were perfectly round from an ice cream scoop.
Schools need to take a proactive approach in making sure students are protected but also ensure they aren't alienating or separating students from positive social interaction. An outright ban doesn't seem smart, but you can find some middle ground. It goes down to educating the students, just like students who have asthma and carry an inhaler, or students who are diabetic and need to eat a snack in the afternoon. Stop keeping your students in the dark.
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