It's so great to hear all these wonderful comments from you GCers! Breakup ended up being very rough in the end, but definitely opened my eyes to what kind of people we both were. Treated myself to an Alex & Ani bracelet for a new start!
And now onto more of the story!
BID DAY
So all of us hopeful PNMs ran back to our dorms to change from our preference outfits to something more comfortable before the three-hour long wait for bids. The way it's done at my school is that all the PNMs who sign a preference card go to the alumni house to do homework, chat, read, go online, whatever until bids are distributed. The small group of us sat downstairs in the alumni house and chatted… it seemed quite a few girls I talked to suicide-bid, mostly for
Sperry's and then
Steve Madden. Immature Ditzy girl was one of them, along with another girl I had befriended. We all sat around, doing homework or watching Youtube videos or otherwise chatting. And somehow, I just couldn't get this nagging, anxious feeling out of my chest.
It's fairly close to five or six when a rho chi enters the room and says she needs to talk to a couple girls. I know what's going to happen next. I'm sure of it. I'm somehow grateful for all the tent talk that's occurred during the week, because the last thing I'd want to feel right now is clueless. She calls out a couple girls by their first names… and of course I hear mine. But wait! There is another girl who has my first name that stands up! (She had suicide-bid
Steve Madden.) I'm off the hook!
But just to be sure, I pipe up, "Wait, she and I have the same name. Which of us is it?"
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And the rho chi says my name.
I'm screwed. Of course, the rho chi leads me and two other girls (one of who knew exactly what was going to happen as well) upstairs to where the Greek Dean of students is waiting, and he informs me that I did not receive a bid to any (meaning one) of the houses I preffed. However, I did have an open bid to
Converse, should I chose to accept it. I can also go through COB and am eligible for snap bidding after 24 hours.
Honestly, the open bid from
Converse was, in my opinion, awkward and even kind of insulting. Not on the part of the dean, but the fact that those girls didn't really know who I was, but yet were willing to make me a part of their sisterhood. I easily declined and left -- why would I chose to be a part of a group that I didn't like from the beginning just to be in a sorority? I had to pass by the room full of new sorority sisters, holding back my tears as it was the only way out of the room.
I sat alone for a while outside in a secluded part of campus and cried. I couldn't believe it had actually happened. I felt so disappointed, like I had failed in some way to make it so far. I knew it had been a risk, but so many other girls had suicide-bid… what made them better than me? Better yet, why had Immature Ditzy Girl gotten a bid to that house?! I was almost more upset about that than not getting a bid! Why her over me? Was it the blonde streaks in my hair? Was I too awkward? Was my major too unusual for a sorority girl?
I don't really remember most of that night. My Steve Madden mentor had texted me saying she had heard what happened from Rho Chi's sister (who received a bid from Steve Madden) and was so sad that she didn't see me at pref and that I was welcome to come to their open recruitment events. I was open to it at this point… maybe I'd get to know the sisters better this way. Maybe right now wasn't the time for me to be a sorority girl.
Or maybe I just wasn't meant to be one.
SO WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?! How do I end up in Alpha Gamma Delta? Did the system make a mistake? Was the other girl supposed to be left bidless and not me? Did Immature Ditzy Girl eat my bid card?! Time will only tell...
Threaded Mode
