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  #11  
Old 06-30-2002, 06:06 PM
neicy81 neicy81 is offline
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 135
Quote:
Originally posted by Sugar_N_Spice


I agree that sex should not be the primary, utmost defining factor in a relationship, and that people do not "NEED" sex. It is possible to remain celibate--I have. But, you have to respect the ideals of others. If a man says he needs sex for the relationship to be fulfilling, then that's his opinion and instead of being upset or angry the woman should not try to change him--she should move on. Neicy, what you just said, turned around, could be used to justify a man's asking for sex. The way you are putting it trivializes some people's views about sex. Not everyone views sex as an act to satisfy their impulses. Many people view sex as an intergral part of a romantic relationship, an act that brings both people in the relationship closer together--and thus not a trivial act bestowed upon any old person walking down the street.

But ask yourself why are YOU having sex.No need to throw in a standard definition of sex.When you are feeling hot and bothered, you definitely aren't thinking "I really want this act of becoming one with another". "I want to become one with her".When you are in the act are you thinking "I am becoming one with her"?I don't think so.



I commend you on being able to respect the woman's decision. There aren't enough men in the world like you. However, not every person feels the way you do about sex. Therefore, it is foolish to presume that one can change a person or persuade them to agree with how they feel about sex. Your argument about sex, can be used to support the opposing side of the issue. Let's say, for example, that you wanted to have sex and your girlfriend did not. You could say that your girlfriend is not respecting your feelings/beliefs.

It's a matter of what Swamp Thing has stated: Look for a person that is compatible with your beliefs and practices, and respect one another's decisions. I would respect a man if they did as Swanp Thing would and straight out said that we should just be friends and respected my decison, rather than attempting to force me to change. As you said, "every good thing is worth waiting for", so if a person's partner wnats to have sex and you don't, for example, then that person needs to "wait on God" to bring them the person who is right for them. [/B]
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