Should we change the way PNMs think of Recruitment?

[AUAZD2001]

Originally Posted by ElieM

eta: KSUViolet bumped the thread I was thinking about. Having the PNMs rank "back-ups" or "alternates" instead of cutting could help some of the misconceptions about rush if I understand correctly

This seems a lot like how high school students apply so multiple colleges ranging from their dream campus to "safety schools." I have a feeling a HIGH percentage (95%+?) of students who don't get accepted to their first (or even second or third) choice still go on to college SOMEWHERE and have a pretty great experience.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by AUAZD2001

This seems a lot like how high school students apply so multiple colleges ranging from their dream campus to "safety schools." I have a feeling a HIGH percentage (95%+?) of students who don't get accepted to their first (or even second or third) choice still go on to college SOMEWHERE and have a pretty great experience.

This makes me wonder about a lot of things. At the majority of schools, the sorority experience is pretty much the same in all the chapters, so it's not as if your experience is going to be sub-par whether you receive a bid to your #1, #2, or #3 choice in the end.

That's why the phrase "I don't feel like I fit" rubs me the wrong way. Especially when a PNM is at a school where the chapters are averaging over 150 women. How does one "not fit" with a group of 150 people? I think the same could be said for a chapter that large saying a particular PNM "doesn't fit."

[carnation]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I think the same could be said for a chapter that large saying a particular PNM "doesn't fit."

That's why I get angry about women telling PNMs, especially at large schools, "you'll end up where you're meant to". No doubt there are people on GC for whom that happened but I can tell you of many others for whom "the system" didn't work.

I don't have a solution for it. I just want to cry when I hear people spouting that off and watch the eager PNMs believing that there's a magic and perfect sorting hat (I wish).

[melindawarren]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

That's why the phrase "I don't feel like I fit" rubs me the wrong way. Especially when a PNM is at a school where the chapters are averaging over 150 women. How does one "not fit" with a group of 150 people? I think the same could be said for a chapter that large saying a particular PNM "doesn't fit."

I mean, I can think of a few explanations:

1. You're a new freshman, homesick as it gets and you don't put yourself out there to bond with the girls. Of course you don't fit! You're crying in your dorm room all the time.

2. You're a new freshman and you legitimately don't fit in at your school. This happens, and it may be joining the sorority that makes you realize that you do have a place--or that reinforces your discomfort.

3. You're a little bit older and joined for social reasons, but you realize that you don't want to be part of the insanity of pledging and you don't fit with the group's expectations for a new member.

4. There are people you'd bond with, if you ever actually met them. It can be hard in big chapters to find someone you click with. Or maybe someone rubbed you the wrong way early on and you think they're all like that.

All problems that can be fixed, but ideas why a girl might not fit.