Family Letters

[33girl]

Might I ask why you never knew this until recently?

I mean, if you only found it out now, it's telling me that the fraternity wasn't a big part of his life as the years went on. My friends' kids are all going to know that "Uncle" Tom and Joe and so on were their dad's fraternity brothers...no matter what (God forbid) should happen.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I would investigate further (i.e. ask your mom and his friends) before doing anything.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Might I ask why you never knew this until recently?

I mean, if you only found it out now, it's telling me that the fraternity wasn't a big part of his life as the years went on.

I thought many NPC and NIC members think their GLO is only a college thing.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I thought many NPC and NIC members think their GLO is only a college thing.

There are people who stay involved at all levels (as in being national volunteers, active in alum chapters, etc) throughout their lives.

Then there are people who don't do anything official with the fraternity, but the majority of their close friends (for long after college) are their brothers/sisters.

Then there are people who think the whole thing was just for college, walk away at graduation, and never do anything with the GLO OR the people they met in it again.

I'm saying if she never knew until now, it kind of makes me think he was example 3, not example 1 or 2.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by 33girl

There are people who stay involved at all levels (as in being national volunteers, active in alum chapters, etc) throughout their lives.

Then there are people who don't do anything official with the fraternity, but the majority of their close friends (for long after college) are their brothers/sisters.

Then there are people who think the whole thing was just for college, walk away at graduation, and never do anything with the GLO OR the people they met in it again.

I'm saying if she never knew until now, it kind of makes me think he was example 3, not example 1 or 2.

Yeah but, even if she could find out which one her father was, does it really matter for what she wants to do?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Yeah but, even if she could find out which one her father was, does it really matter for what she wants to do?

I personally would feel really silly if I found my dad's fraternity pin, got all verklempt about it and got a lavalier and was proudly talking about our bond, and then found out that he got kicked out of the fraternity 6 months after he initiated and never gave back the pin.

If mom would be negative about it at this point in time, and lie to the daughter about it, that's just lousy. Let her suck it up and tell her daughter the real story.

(Oh, and anyone who's cleaned out their parents' house and found a couple surprises knows exactly why I'm saying it's bad to assume.)

[NutBrnHair]

My Dad was President of his fraternity, but I was unaware of this fact until long after his death. He died when I was 13 -- I never remember him mentioning anything about Greek life. This could have been because the fraternity became defunct -- or actually some chapters became Pi Kappa Alpha, some TKE, etc.

Anyway, I found his fraternity pin quite a few years ago and have worn it on my charm bracelet ever since. It's a very neat connection to have, since I too served as President of my fraternity, and it makes me smile when I wear the bracelet.