Worst Wedding You've Ever Attended

[SWTXBelle]

Yes, it's a year later - but I thought I'd mention (for Mystic Cat) that my Anglican-Use Roman Catholic parish does still publish the banns. I love the banns.

AND I can't believe I forgot my brother's wedding. My mother was on a jury the week before the wedding and really freaking out that she wouldn't be finished in time to have any time to do what she needed to get done. She got out one day early. The bride was nominally Roman Catholic. I was a bridesmaid, and during the rehearsal the priest told me not to bow my head "so much" at the altar. I told him I usually genuflect. THEN - my family is Episcopalian and we had been told their would be no communion. SURPRISE - we are going to have communion, which my brother cannot have. I now know that communion is standard, but we were told this at the rehearsal the night before. My daughters, then 2 and 4, were flower girls. Adorable, yes - wearing beautiful black velvet bodiced dresses with white damasked taffeta skirts we got at Neiman-Marcus. (As an aside - I had Cinderella, my youngest, in a stroller when we went to pick up the dresses. She had a corn cob on a stick and was waving it about wildly. Mind you, I made sure we were nowhere near any stock, but it was amusing to see sales clerks on the verge of tears as we winded our way through the store) but TOO YOUNG to sit through an hour and a half service. Upon seeing the bride in her very 90s gown the 2 year old started saying "Cinda-ella! Cinda-ella!" Again, cute. But midway through the interminable service, just as we were all about to lose our minds, Cinderella starts to take off her shoes. First one, then the other. She then sits down, plays with her skirt, etc., etc. Meanwhile, the photographer is everywhere - this surprises me, since my church at the time and now both allow only non-intrusive non-flash pictures. It takes FOREVER. By the time we get to the reception at a Lake Jackson yacht club (if you are from TX you know why that is funny) where there IS NO FOOD LEFT. I am starving - no food. Where are the bride and groom? They are off getting pictures taken in front of random yachts. We didn't get to spend time with them - they finally came in, got the all important pictures, and left. It wasn't a wedding; it was a photo op.

Gypsyboots is eloping in January. We are working on a reception later in the spring. THERE WILL BE ENOUGH FOOD.

[naraht]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Yes, it's a year later - but I thought I'd mention (for Mystic Cat) that my Anglican-Use Roman Catholic parish does still publish the banns. I love the banns.

I still find it bizarre that in Canada, one of the things that led to Gay Marriage in the country was that Ontario Law basically says that if banns are posted and nobody objects then the couple is married. Two men did that and nobody who objected to Gay Marriage objected in time...

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Yes, it's a year later - but I thought I'd mention (for Mystic Cat) that my Anglican-Use Roman Catholic parish does still publish the banns. I love the banns.

That is cool considering even most Episcopal parishes don't use them any more.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I was in a sister's Catholic wedding and the priest made a point to tell us at the rehearsal that if we didn't want a blessing or communion (I did not as I'm not Catholic), to place one finger over our mouths to indicate to that when it was our turn. Problem solved. I assumed that all Catholic churches did that (or the folded arms thing) and that was the universal symbol for "do not want."

Hmmm...the last Catholic church I attended had the following rules:

I want communion = outstretched hands
Just a blessing = folded arms
I don't want either = "reverently walk by"

When I attended mass with my aunt, she told me to just stay in my seat. I didn't know the finger over the mouth was a universal symbol for anything other than "Shhh be quiet" unless I'm doing it wrong in my head. Well, at least the priest told you ahead of time because a lot of them in this thread seemed to not have done that!

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

Hmmm...the last Catholic church I attended had the following rules:

I want communion = outstretched hands
Just a blessing = folded arms
I don't want either = "reverently walk by"

Interesting. I've never heard the "reverently walk by" except for situations where both bread and wine are offered and you choose to receive bread and not wine. (You only have to get one or the other, but if both are offered, some people opt for both.)

In the Catholic parish where I grew up, the practice was as follows:

I want a Communion wafer = outstretched hands, or hands by your sides or folded in prayer, say "Amen" when the priest says "The body of Christ", and then open your mouth and stick out your tongue slightly (the priest or eucharistic minister then places the wafer on your tongue).
Just a blessing = folded arms
I don't want either = stay seated, although you may have to stand and step aside to let people farther down the pew to get out and get in line

The parish seldom offered wine. When they did, you would receive and swallow your wafer and then either queue for wine or "reverently walk by" and go back to your pew.

Non-Catholics (whether or not they belong to another Christian denomination) are ineligible to receive Communion, as is anyone conscious of having committed a mortal sin.

I've been to a Nuptial Mass once since I converted to Judaism. I just kept my butt in my chair and said a silent prayer for the couple's happiness.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by honeychile

Wine in a Presbyterian Church?!?!??!?

LOL. What I meant was arms folded across the chest means receiving a blessing rather than receiving the elements.

That said, yes, you will find wine in many Presbyterian churches. (The requirement is that if wine is used, non-alcoholic grape juice must also be available for those who cannot or prefer not to drink wine.) You are not likely to find wafers, though. We tend to use loaves that are cut or torn into proper-sized pieces.

Originally Posted by aephi alum

Non-Catholics (whether or not they belong to another Christian denomination) are ineligible to receive Communion . . . .

Not quite. I believe that canon law provides that Orthodox Christians may receive communion in a Catholic church. (Whether Orthodox would be allowed by their own canons to receive is a different matter.) I think canon law also provides that other Christians may, under extraordinary circumstances (including, I think, the permission of the bishop), receive communion in a Catholic church if they are unable for some reason to have access to a minister of their own church and they share the Catholic understanding of the sacrament.

That said, there is a large Catholic church nearby that openly invites Protestants to receive communion. It threw us a bit the first time we were there (for a neighbor's son's First Communion). I'm told the bishop repeatedly told them to stop. I'm also told that since the parish is run by Franciscans not directly under the bishop's authority, they would smile and nod and keep on doing it.

[SWTXBelle]

Interesting hijack! Our parish gives the Eucharist by intinction - the wafer is dipped in the wine and then placed on the tongue (my boys wield a mean paten). So those receiving usually kneel (!) with their hands held together in the traditional prayer position and open their mouths as the priest/deacon approaches. I always go up for a blessing - can't have too many blessings - as I have to get an annulment before I can be a 100 percenter. While I have finished most of my paperwork, current husband hasn't even begun on his, so I'm in an earthly limbo of sorts.

[aephi alum]

While traveling abroad, I once went to a Mass at a parish where the Eucharist was offered by intinction. You went up to the altar rail and knelt, and from there you had two choices. If you extended your hands, the priest said "The body of Christ", you answered "Amen", and the priest put the wafer in your hand. If you held your hands in the prayer position, the priest said "The body and blood of Christ", you answered "Amen" and opened your mouth, and the priest dipped the wafer in wine and placed it on your tongue. I had never seen this practice before, and after Mass I got an explanation out of my father.

So now that we've completely derailed this thread... LOL