Tara,
I understand what you are saying and you are making valid points.
However, when I went through rush, I did not know alumnae from every chapter on my campus. I was able to find some local Alumnae chapters and get in contact with some wonderful women. They did not blindly give me a recommendation by any means. I spoke with them via email, over the telephone, and even went to lunch with them. I had to submit a resume to them, basically tell them my entire life story, and explain my feelings on sorority life, what I was hoping to get out of it, and my reasons for rushing. True, I didn't know these women when I originally contacted them, but I made it a point to get to know them before they wrote me recs.
I don't understand how that could be against the rules, maybe it's only at your school. My school was completely fine with it though.
Like I said before, some schools - particularly those with ultra-competitive recruitments, will REQUIRE that rushees sumbit letters of recommendation in order to advance through the rounds of rush. It all depends on what school you are attending. Colleges with huge greek systems (like SEC schools) put more emphasis on recs than say, schools in California (one of my friends who rushed at a local college didn't even know what recs were - and she did just fine).
Hope this helps!
chantillylace
Threaded Mode