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Bid Day… with a twist!
So, I’ll start with Philanthropy and catch up to Bid Day.
Iced tea: Zoe liked the girls she talked to and thinks the philanthropy is great. Again, like, not love.
BBQ brisket: Zoe was surprised at how much she liked her timewith brisket. She really connected with the two girls who rushed her.
Blue Bell ice cream: She loved Blue Bell, and their philanthropy was her favorite.
Fried okra: This house remained the place where she felt most comfortable, and it remained her favorite.
Breakfast taco: Zoe was surprised to have been asked back to Breakfast taco. She accidentally went to the wrong house first and so wassweaty and nervous when she got there. It didn’t get better from there – just uncomfortable and without a connection.
Fried catfish: Zoe’s second-favorite, Fried catfish was a fun time with a good craft.
Dr. Pepper: Great time here as well.
For Skit Day, Zoe was a little worried after only getting 2 invites back. But she was happy that they were to her 2 favorite houses, Fried okra and Fried catfish… (The more fried, the better, right?)
Fried okra was first. It was the first time throughout the process, except maybe for Breakfast taco the day before, where she thought things didn’t go well. She just felt a disconnect. Fried catfish, though, was awesome, and for the first time it moved solidly into the lead.
Then came the morning of Pref Night…. And the dreaded phone call. Zoe found out that she had been released from recruitment.
Of course, she was devastated. Anyone who says that Rush is no big deal is either lying or doing it wrong, because there’s no way not to get caught up in it, and there’s no way not to take it as a judgment of you – your looks/personality/poise/accomplishments, etc. When you put yourself up to be evaluated like this and it doesn’t work out, it hurts.
She was inconsolable for about two hours. I talked to her on the phone, then her bf came over and he and her roommate made fried pickles (fortunately not in my code!) and margaritas… Yes, at 11 in the morning.
When I called her back, she sounded like a different person. No, she wasn’t completely over it, but she was already making plans for the fall and for the money she won’t have to spend on dues. She had decided to go to Toronto next month to visit her best friend who had moved away the day after hs graduation and whom she hasn’t seen since. She was also able to join a professional society and another philanthropic group that she wouldn’t have had time for. She went and got her books for fall and then went to a theme party at a frat house… after all, they need some girls to show up since everyone is all wrapped up in rush!
I was more proud of her yesterday than I had been throughout the entire process because of how resilient she was and how she handled her disappointment and turned it around into something positive. Although being a sophomore has its drawbacks – and probably played a huge part in her release from the process – it worked for her when it came to moving on. She already had a complete life before Rush and she still did afterwards. I think it is much worse for freshmen who come to campus with no real connection there and few friends yet. If they are released, many of them must feel very lost.
Having said that, I offer this advice: If you are considering going through recruitment, do it as a freshman if at all possible. Zoe found out before Skit Round that two of her favorite houses – Texas sheet cake and Frito pie – had dropped her because they have a different sophomore grade requirement than that for freshmen. Now, Zoe was Salutatorian in her hs class of 775 and graduated with a 4.75, and in her first year at Texas, she earned a 3.4 – not too bad. However, these two groups (and maybe others, idk), require rushing sophs to have a 3.5 instead of a 3.0 like freshmen, and that is non-negotiable. Now, if she could go back and somehow worked harder last year to get that extra .1, would she do it? No. She stressed about grades in hs and doesn’t want to do that in college. Again, it’s a POV that comes with being a little older.
So, that’s it for Zoe’s attempt at Greek life and for my brief foray on GC. As many of you know, it was not a great experience. However, it was worth it because I connected with four women with whom I plan to stay in touch and who have been a great support system. Plus, we have found that we have more to talk about than sororities and Rush, which is what I hope for all of the girls going through recruitment, whether they end up pledging or not.
Finally, for the not-so-nice girls on here: Please remember that while you are anonymous, you are representing sorority girls on this site. Why feed into the negative stereotypes? I have raised my kids (I hope) to believe that it is always better to be nice than not if you have the choice.
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