Shutter Fraternities for Young Women's Good

[DrPhil]

Interesting. I dated, attended social events and still disagree with the literal interpretation of "men are from mars, women are from venus." What it actually boils down to is that Drolefille and I (and those who feel as we do) have a different interpretation of what the biological differences result in.

Sex is biological and gender is social. The "nature versus nurture" debate has never been settled when it comes to gender. A big reason why is that there are no studies to provide solid evidence of the strength of biology over the strength of the social because no one is allowing test subjects who have just gotten out of the womb. One of the closest incidents that lends itself to the emphasis on "nature" is David Reimer whose story was shared in John Colapinto's As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Girl.

What I do know is there are people who have raised their own children to be gender neutral and relatively androgynous. Beyond some differences in hormones and bodies (and having to deal with people's stupid "what are you" taunts), there were fewer differences between the sons and daughters than there traditionally is when socialization is gendered.

I posit that the differences between the biological sexes has been exaggerated. For instance, girls and boys aren't born liking pink and blue or dolls and toy cars. Families decorate baby rooms with those things and therefore that becomes the first things the kids learn. Then that applies to how girls are taught to sit calmly and play with dolls while the boys can roar around with toy cars. Would those boys and girls do that if adults didn't teach and permit that? Females like myself who were raised both playing with dolls and toy cars; and jumping from trees "like the boys" are called "tomboys." People hope we'll grow out of it and it frightens parents when we don't. Then people wonder if kids who defy gender stereotypes will be homosexual or "will the young ladies ever stop being so aggressive like the men" or "will she ever be able to get married."

With allllll of that said, no, I'm not buying that men and women are just so darn different; and that these differences are innate or inevitable. I refuse to believe that men have these crazy penises and sexual urges that can't be stopped. That keeps men in the state of boys who are having their first wet dream. And I still don't see why the topic of sexual assault and rape has to be rooted in the presumed differences between men and women in the first place.

/damn this was a long post