Greek Romantic Troubles.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by jhawk2817

classic case of taking-greek-life-too-seriously.

I am third gen Pike, with two of my uncles AND 4 cousins + my own brother joining Pikes in 11 different schools. So trust me when I say it gets old. Dont get me wrong, I like the tradition and all, but introducing heartaches in relationships on silly premises and traditions suitable for teens is just a tad too much.

Plus, it is not his fault that you were not close to any guy before you met him. How do you expect him to wait for you (retrospectively) in the past while he had a chance of meeting people. Solution: There is none, because I dont see a legitimate problem here.

WTF? Why does this even matter? Your uncles' experience gives you more credibility somehow?

Way to bump a thread where the OP got her vent out and came to a good conclusion just so that you could give a (now irrelevant to the OP's situation, I would assume) stupid opinion with a good dash of "Well I know because I am related to 7,000 Pikes" even though that doesn't matter.

RE: Other people's opinions on lavaliering, I tend to be with 33girl. For me, it was just never something I wanted, but that doesn't mean some of my sisters who eventually were lavaliered by their boyfriends didn't see it as significant evolution in their relationships. I do think that most of the women I know who were lavaliered did end up marrying their college boyfriends and they seem to be doing fine. It might not matter after college but there are a crap ton of things that don't matter after college.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by agzg

RE: Other people's opinions on lavaliering, I tend to be with 33girl. For me, it was just never something I wanted, but that doesn't mean some of my sisters who eventually were lavaliered by their boyfriends didn't see it as significant evolution in their relationships. I do think that most of the women I know who were lavaliered did end up marrying their college boyfriends and they seem to be doing fine. It might not matter after college but there are a crap ton of things that don't matter after college.

I don't know a single person who was lavaliered; I've heard about it secondhand through friends and GC. I'm sure it has to do with where I went to college, as well as the fact that before college, most of the Greeks I knew were NPHC members. I know it's important to some people, it's just not that important to me.

I do think that it can lead to a lot of insecurity (or even false security) among young women about their relationships. I know of chapters where it was almost a competition to see who was going to get lavaliered first and girls were upset when a friend who hadn't been in a relationship as long got lavaliered. It sounds silly but these things can totally be the end of the world when you're 21.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

Lavaliering is a status symbol. He's already thinking about engagement. I think that says a lot more than a stupid letter drop.

I don't agree with this at all - that it's only a status symbol - and calling lavaliering "stupid" is pretty whack.

If lavaliering in your experience has been lame, sorry, but that's not everyone's experience and no reason to trash it.

[katydidKD]

Some rainbows: I know of two girls that were lavaliered and the guy is now married to someone else. Their spouse was not lavaliered because of the one-person rule. He just made a mistake, but it'll still work out

[PiKA2001]

Originally Posted by katydidKD

Their spouse was not lavaliered because of the one-person rule.

Waitaminute...what..uhhh...?

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by katydidKD

Some rainbows: I know of two girls that were lavaliered and the guy is now married to someone else. Their spouse was not lavaliered because of the one-person rule. He just made a mistake, but it'll still work out

I was lavaliered, and we ended up breaking up (for which I'm glad because he did intend it to be a precursor to engagement, and we did not need to be married). It was important at the time, and I was very happy since at that time I was leaning towards engagement. However I took a little crap because a couple of other girls had been in relationships with their boyfriends longer and weren't happy he did it before they did. Which soured me a little bit on the whole experience...I think it's a sweet tradition, and it's cute, but it shouldn't be taken so damn seriously.

[jhawk2817]

agzg,

First off all, it was relevant because I was pointing out how most people take greek life too seriously, and me being related to so many would mean I would be the epitomy of this; which I am not.

Secondly, the same [now in bold] text of your reply says that it is childish (its just a shirt) and is not expected of someone who is not 18, like OP here. I gave my letters to a girl i didn't even like.

If you don't like what I am posting, just shut up and give your own opinions. Then leave.

I don't recall checking an accept box where it said I had to point out which lines of my answer corresponded to which part of the OP's question and how.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by jhawk2817

agzg,

First off all, it was relevant because I was pointing out how most people take greek life too seriously, and me being related to so many would mean I would be the epitomy of this; which I am not.

Secondly, the same [now in bold] text of your reply says that it is childish (its just a shirt) and is not expected of someone who is not 18, like OP here. I gave my letters to a girl i didn't even like.

If you don't like what I am posting, just shut up and give your own opinions. Then leave.

I don't recall checking an accept box where it said I had to point out which lines of my answer corresponded to which part of the OP's question and how.

Bite me, asshat.

All of us know thousands of Greeks. Regardless of whether we're related to them, I think all of us have a lot of experience with this (particularly old-heads who have been contributing alumni members for decades - love you guys!)

You had nothing new to add, a bunch of other people now have nothing new to add. You can thank yourself for making GreekChat just a little bit dumber with every post.

[jhawk2817]

wow. I don't understand why you have a problem with me saying something.

And btw, there is a difference between knowing greeks in college and growing up with almost all male members talking about the same thing with the same greek memorabilia all around, throughout your life. Regardless, I am not trying to please you with my answers.

I am done. Please go policing comments somewhere else. I think I saw a sentence someone typed in the hazing section that was a bit off topic. You should definitely check it out and let them have it.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by jhawk2817

wow. I don't understand why you have a problem with me saying something.

And btw, there is a difference between knowing greeks in college and growing up with almost all male members talking about the same thing with the same greek memorabilia all around, throughout your life. Regardless, I am not trying to please you with my answers.

I am done. Please go policing comments somewhere else. I think I saw a sentence someone typed in the hazing section that was a bit off topic. You should definitely check it out and let them have it.

[katydidKD]

You can only lavaliere one person, or at least in every chapter that I've ever known of.

[thetaj]

^ Agreed. It doesn't seem to happen much at my campus, and when it does, it means it's a serious relationship but it's more of a sweet than a very serious thing. We do candle passes for engagements and when a girl is lavaliered, and we've only had one girl be lavaliered. It was very sweet when she blew out her candle because we were all SHOCKED and SUPER excited and she was like, "Don't freak out I'm not engaged!!! But he gave me his lavaliere and a key to his place!" and it was cute

[ElieM]

You know - I love Greeks for the continued and ongoing use of the word lavaliere. It just doesn't get a work out like it used to.

[KSig RC]

This thread is the very definition of "First-World Problem"

[ElieM]

Originally Posted by Jen

I have to say, every time I hear it, my mind goes straight to Sweet Valley High. That was the ONLY place I'd ever heard the word lavaliere before GC lol.

lol - I think of Chicago

ROXIE: And I'll appear in a lavaliere
That goes all the way down to my waist.