Needing motivation for myself and chapter!

[ASTalumna06]

Hey there, sister!

Originally Posted by kt8319

Hey sisters,
I am a new member this year, and our chapter is quite small (17 members), and made up mostly of new members. I haven't been feeling a real connection to most of my sisters, and I feel that we are all very separated, even though we have sisterhoods at least once a week. We have already had four girls disaffiliate, and morale is low. Honestly, I feel quite disconnected to my chapter and I'm having a hard time staying motivated. I really want to feel like a true sister and I just don't feel like that's happening. Does anyone have any ideas on feeling more fulfilled in your sisterhood and unifying a somewhat disconnected chapter, especially a small one? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

I was also in a small chapter, so hopefully I'll be able to help you out some.

Now, before I ask some of the questions I have...

..being in a smaller chapter is always a little challenging.. especially if most of you are new members. As you start to get more involved, you realize that there are A LOT of positions to fill. At one point, I was holding 3 positions - Secretary (there weren't enough people to separate the position into Corresponding and Recording), By-laws, Collegiate-Alum Liaison... and I was also the President of Panhellenic. Try to understand that the active sisters probably have a lot on their plate.

The good news for you - this gives you the perfect opportunity to get involved. While there may not be enough members to have committees, you can still help out with positions. Approach the President and ask if there are any sisters who might need some assistance. Maybe even the President herself could use an extra hand. Is there a huge event approaching that a sister needs help planning? Be the person to step up and offer to do whatever you can. You might even want to suggest to your fellow new members that all of you shadow an active sister and help them with their duties/projects/programming.

Have you made an effort to hang out with the other new members? Do you girls do things outside of these weekly sisterhood events? If social events ALWAYS feel forced, people will no longer find them fun. One day, ask some of the new members if they want to go out after one of your meetings.

I know that you're pretty new to the chapter, but you might want to throw this idea out to the group: Secret Sisters. If you don't do this already or know what it is, it's just like Secret Santa, except it lasts all semester. Everyone chooses a sister's name out of a hat, and throughout the semester, you randomly do something nice for your secret sister. It could be something as simple as sending them a card to brighten their day. We always had a limit on how much we could spend for the semester, and we each made Secret Sister info sheets (containing small pieces of information about ourselves.. for example, favorites: food, color, music) that were found in a central location online - they would provide everyone with some facts about their secret sister if they didn't know them that well. At the end of the semester we'd have a small get-together, and everyone would reveal their secret sisters and exchange small gifts.


Now, saying all of that, a few questions:

1) Why is morale low?

2) Why did the 4 girls disaffiliate (without going into too much detail)?

3) Why are you feeling disconnected? Is this causing you to feel apathetic, and in turn, unmotivated?

[kt8319]

ASTalumna06,
To answer your questions:
1) Why is morale low?
Because we haven't been making much progress and keep losing members.
2) Why did the 4 girls disaffiliate (without going into too much detail)?
They felt that sorority life wasn't right for them/AST was not a good fit.
3) Why are you feeling disconnected? Is this causing you to feel apathetic, and in turn, unmotivated?
I feel that I am not close to any of my sisters, except one, even though I have reached out to other sisters. And actually, I am feeling even more motivated. I was given the position of Recruitment Director and I'm working hard to make sure our informal spring recruitment goes well.

To answer other questions about sisterhoods:
Ours are pretty somewhat structured: tie-dying AST shirts, a trip to a cider mill, etc. I guess we have to have a more relaxed plan so we can actually get to know each other!

Thanks for the advice everyone!

[victoriana]

Hey sister!! I'm in a fairly small chapter too, it's about 35 girls. During the beginning of my new member period (earlier this year) I kinda felt the same way, like I wasn't connecting with all the girls. We ended up really bonding as a group through activities like sleepovers, planning fundraisers, hanging out after meetings, and getting together at the house for sisterhoods. Have you guys tried spending a longer amount of time together as a new member class? I know the sleepover was the thing that really helped us, because our sisterhoods were never longer than 2 or 3 hours, so that was the longest we would see each other. Having to spend 12+ hours together really gave us more time to get to know each other and it was tons of fun! After that, we started making plans more casually outside of sorority events, and our friendships just grew from there. I really hope that the new semester brings higher morale and lots of new girls for you!!

[33girl]

Originally Posted by kt8319

ASTalumna06,
2) Why did the 4 girls disaffiliate (without going into too much detail)?
They felt that sorority life wasn't right for them/AST was not a good fit.

In other words, they said "it's not you, it's me." It really is true in this case. Just move on. The absolute worst thing for a small chapter is people who aren't into it. 4 blah people in a chapter of 100 is not really a biggie, 4 blah people in a chapter of 17 can bring everything down all the time.

Try having a lock-in or a retreat (if you don't have a house, see if someone has a cabin or even if you could have it in the student center). You can plan some things that are LIGHTLY structured, but honestly the best thing is just to get a couple of dumb movies and sit around laughing with each other. Those are the best times.