Why are so many people in their 20s taking so long to grow up?

[aephi alum]

There is a difference between moving back in with your parents because you have to (you can't find a job that pays enough for rent, food, and other necessities - or you can't find a job at all - despite your best efforts) and moving back in with your parents because you don't want to have to work.

epchick, you're in the former situation, and you and your parents are no doubt expecting that you'll get back on your feet financially and move out at some point in the future - and that is perfectly fine.

I think Dee is talking about the latter situation, where parents say, "Sure, kid, come and live with us indefinitely," knowing that their child is not really motivated to get a job and be financially independent. Next thing you know, the "kid" is in his 50s or 60s and still living with - and mooching off - mom and dad.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by aephi alum

I think Dee is talking about the latter situation, where parents say, "Sure, kid, come and live with us indefinitely," knowing that their child is not really motivated to get a job and be financially independent. Next thing you know, the "kid" is in his 50s or 60s and still living with - and mooching off - mom and dad.

Sounds like my college ex-boyfriend. We're still good friends--and knowing how he lives now, I never wonder "what if."

I don't know how I felt about that article...I'm 29, single, and secure in my education and career. I'm not slacking, and I was pretty lucky to find a well-paying dream job at 24. That said, I'm ready for The Next Thing--marriage and a family--and it doesn't seem like anyone my age is really up for that. Very few of my friends have gotten married, and of those, none of them intend on having kids for a while.

[33girl]

I moved back in with my parents after graduation for a few years. I was working full time retail at the time. My mother was partially disabled by that time, so I also did a lot of things concerning my grandparents (her parents) that she couldn't do.

Some people think I was "spoiled" because I came back there and lived rent free but they have no idea what my day to day was like. I'd wager to say that among these "refusing to grow up" kids, there are probably some similar stories.

Out of my college and HS friends who married right after HS/college, the percentage of people who are actually still with that first spouse is about 50/50.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Some people think I was "spoiled" because I came back there and lived rent free but they have no idea what my day to day was like. I'd wager to say that among these "refusing to grow up" kids, there are probably some similar stories.

Yes, one of my best girlfriends moved home right after graduation because her father had died earlier that year, and her grandmother about a year before that, and she was the only child of an only child and had to do a lot of estate stuff with her mom. It was definitely not a "fun" time for her.