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06-30-2010, 11:10 AM
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Quote:
So what does it say about a mother who would let a monster like this around her children? Something like this is usually not an isolated incident.
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Yes, there's a lot of truth in what you say. But I'd also ask, where were these little girls' own fathers? When the fathers stick around, there is no room for a stepfather. Statistically, stepfathers and mothers' boyfriends are far greater dangers to children than biological fathers.
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Last edited by Low C Sharp; 09-20-2011 at 05:15 PM.
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06-30-2010, 12:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Low C Sharp
Yes, there's a lot of truth in what you say. But I'd also ask, where were these little girls' own fathers? When the fathers stick around, there is no room for a stepfather. Statistically, stepfathers and mothers' boyfriends are far greater dangers to children than biological fathers.
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Do you have a report to back this up? I'd be interested in reading it.
It seems to me that someone depraved enough to cause significant harm to a child would do it whether or not it was his/her biological child.
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06-30-2010, 12:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by agzg
Do you have a report to back this up? I'd be interested in reading it.
It seems to me that someone depraved enough to cause significant harm to a child would do it whether or not it was his/her biological child.
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Google gave me this
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Killings of children less than five years of age by stepfathers versus (putative) genetic fathers are compared on the basis of Canadian and British national archives of homicides. In addition to previously reported differences in gross rates, the two categories of killings differed in their attributes. Beatings constituted a relatively large proportion of steppatemal homicides, whereas genetic fathers were relatively likely to shoot or asphyxiate their victims. A substantial proportion of killings by genetic fathers, but almost none of those by stepfathers, were accompanied by suicide and/or uxoricide. These contrasts lend support to the hypothesis that the differential risks incurred by children in different household types reflect the differential parental solicitude that is predictable from an evolutionary model of parental motivation.
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07-01-2010, 12:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Low C Sharp
When the fathers stick around, there is no room for a stepfather.
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How so? I know plenty of people who very involved fathers and stepfathers. Why would a child not be able to have both?
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07-01-2010, 02:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Low C Sharp
But I'd also ask, where were these little girls' own fathers? When the fathers stick around, there is no room for a stepfather.
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If the 'mother' gets remarried, wouldn't that automatically make her husband a 'stepfather' regardless of whether the biological father sticks around?
I'm so glad that my stepfather stepped up and took the "father" role that my sperm donor was too chicken-shitted to take. I wouldn't have it any other way.
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Last edited by epchick; 07-01-2010 at 02:41 PM.
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07-01-2010, 02:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by epchick
If the 'mother' gets remarried, wouldn't that automatically make her husband a 'stepfather' regardless of whether the biological father sticks around?
I'm so glad that my stepfather stepped up and took the "father" role that my sperm donor was too chicken-shitted to take. I wouldn't have it any other way.
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Of course. There is room for as many INVOLVED and POSITIVE parenting figures in a kids' life as there are people willing to fill the role. A kid cannot have too many loving positive role models in their lives. I would welcome a step-mother into my kids' lives as long as she wasn't a dysfunctional mess. I am secure enough in my role as their mother to be completely fine with my ex remarrying and bringing a woman into their lives. I suspect she and I would become friends too.
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07-01-2010, 02:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Low C Sharp
When the fathers stick around, there is no room for a stepfather.
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I think this is extremely narrow-minded of you. I've known several people who have been fortunate enough to be loved and supported by both their biological parents and their step-parents.
ETA: I totally agree with what Dee said above.
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