Discipline: Spanking

[DrPhil]

Alumiyum, I stand behind my comments. Parents need to figure out whatever they need to figure out for their children and whatever works for their kids. Parenting is difficult but it isn't impossible. It is your cousin's job to figure out her child. If that means they won't go out in public because nothing works for the annoying child then that's completely on them and, depending on who you ask (including some child experts), that reflects more on the parents than the child. If the child has special needs then the needs must be learned to the best of their ability. If the child is The Omen then...I dunno.

This isn't a "how to" thread for parenting. Everything that I have said can be applied however parents see fit. If parents want to stay at home, get take-out, or leave everytime their child acts up (often because they didn't fix the problem the first two times their child acted up in public...not every badass child has "special needs") then that's fine for them. I hope the parents don't end up miserable or their child never feels that he or she is in charge of their household. If that happens, they shouldn't really wonder why.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Alumiyum, I stand behind my comments. Parents need to figure out whatever they need to figure out for their children and whatever works for their kids. Parenting is difficult but it isn't impossible. It is your cousin's job to figure out her child. If that means they won't go out in public because nothing works for the annoying child then that's completely on them and, depending on who you ask (including some child experts), that reflects more on the parents than the child. If the child has special needs then the needs must be learned to the best of their ability. If the child is The Omen then...I dunno.

This isn't a "how to" thread for parenting. Everything that I have said can be applied however parents see fit. If parents want to stay at home, get take-out, or leave everytime their child acts up (often because they didn't fix the problem the first two times their child acted up in public...not every badass child has "special needs") then that's fine for them. I hope the parents don't end up miserable or their child never feels that he or she is in charge of their household. If that happens, they shouldn't really wonder why.

Simply put, I stand by what I said as well. Children, like dogs, are not robots and it is not always possible to simply input a certain program to get a certain result. Sometimes they will do as they please, regardless of the consequences.

I am simply observing that in some cases, my cousins included, this is absolutely not a case of the child acting up repeatedly and being allowed to escalate. The child experts they have consulted-yes, more than one- have found no special needs and all the creative disciplining advice they've been given they've tried (aside from spanking) so the result is that they just leave when she pulls this crap and discipline her at home. I don't understand the need to look down upon this action. Good parents do not subject the restaurant to a screaming child. And even the best parents will not get exactly the behavior they want out of their child 100% of the time.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Forrealdoe?!

All of my posts said this.

My response was mostly colored by what I perceive to be a disdain for parents who remove their child from the situation because of the assumption that this means they are not effective at disciplining at home. Because that is an assumption.