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I don't know about other chapters, but what we were told as AXDs was that active, undergrad members may not drink in their letters but alumnae can (presuming of course that they are of age to drink legally). I've seen alums in their Quills have a glass of wine, for example.
That leads me to believe the primary reason for us not drinking in our letters is to avoid looking bad - lots of people would see a legal undergrad drinking responsibly in letters and assume she was underage. And of course we don't all drink responsibly, so at least it isn't being associated with our chapter. (Although people will probably know what chapter you're in out of letters too.)
But a 50-year old having a glass of wine doesn't look bad. The assumption, which may not always be true, is that alums have the wisdom to decide whether or not having that drink would reflect poorly on Alpha Xi Delta.
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Alpha Xi Delta
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