The Hard Days

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I find that tension in a sorority builds in a certain pattern over the year.

Beginning of the school year (around August or so): Happy happy joy joy. Everyone has just moved into the house. Everone just LOVES each other and is super excited.

First month of school/recruitment prep time: People are still loving each other, but small disagreements starting to pop up. It's still early in the year so everyone sings "kumbaya" and gets over it.

Recruitment: Stress and drama start to build. The "kumbaya" is starting to lose its power. You're kind of tired of looking at these people every day and night for a week.

Bid Day (mid sept): Any building disagreements are put aside because YAY NEW MEMBERS.

Homecoming (Octoberish-Novemberish): The disagreements are back. The drama that started during recruitment is back because the "yay new members" has worn off. House girls are starting to annoy each other with their annoying habits. The selection of NM bigs may also occur during this time. This may flat out pit 2 sisters against each other. Sides may or may not be taken. The "kumbaya" and holding hands singing sorority songs apprach is not working.

Winter break: THANK GOD. Everybody goes home for awhile and all drama is suspended.

Januaryish: Officer election time. Drama that has been building since recruitment has resurfaced for slating/elections. Elections cause complete and total uproar. There may or may not be crying. It is guaranteed that at least 2 people will threaten to quit. lol. House girls annoyance may finally blow up. There may or may not be crying or threatening to move out.

February-March: Fall-out from election drama still exists. Current officers are literally counting down the days til May. Seniors are burned out and wonder why they still have to come around. Cue complianing. New members are now initiated. Cue more complaining from them about drama they didn't even know existed.

April-May: Everyone begins to see the light at the end of tunnel. Drama settles. Seniors start to look back and get nostalgic. They stop complaining. New Members have realized that drama is part of life. Warm and fuzzy activities like formal, senior talks, etc. smooth over the drama. New girls choose to live in house and are OMG SO EXCITED about it and think it's going to be the BEST EVAR. Current house girls look back on year and realize that it was fun, but that they are looking forward to living in their own apts. Seniors graduate. Everyone cries. They all go home. Cycle repeats itself.

Drama in EVERY chapter seems to follow the same pattern. So don't sweat it.

I'm glad to say this wasn't the cycle of my college career, but I guess I see it happening for some people. However...

Originally Posted by Smile_Awhile

You guys know those times, when you want to love your organization, but you are just having issues? I'm there now.

I love all that AXO stands for. I love my sisters. I put a LOT of time into my chapter, I attend every event that doesn't directly conflict with anything that involves my future (i.e. auditions, classes), and that is the vast majority of events. But I'm not getting anything back from it right now. And as selfish as that sounds, it's really hard to be excited about wearing my letters and living my ritual when I'm not feeling others reciprocating and giving back too.

So... what do you do? What kept you going even on those hard days?

If this "not feeling others reciprocating and giving back, too" is what's really bothering you, I can tell you that I DEFINTELY felt that during my last semester (and a little bit before that). I come from a very small chapter (at least, it used to be). When there are only 10 girls starting out in the fall, and half of them are apathetic, it makes it very hard to get anything done.

But... I look back now and I think I loved my last semester more than anything... Because I had some of the best times with the sisters who I know truly loved the sorority and wanted to do everything possible to make sure that we survived.

I graduated in December, and the summer before that I had attended Convention and my chapter won the Outstanding Chapter Award (basically the highest award a chapter can get.. along with $2,000) and it felt amazing. Knowing that a group of 10-15 girls accomplished that was awesome. And knowing that I somehow contributed to that was even better. Everyone always encourages you to look forward and to forget about the past, but some days, it was the one thing that kept me going.

There will definitely be hard times (as with anything that you're committed to for life!), but as they say in my favorite movie of all time, 'Good Will Hunting'... "You'll have bad times... but they'll always wake you up to the good stuff you weren't paying attention to."