Food-Stealing Roommates

[violetpretty]

[chickenoodle]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I guess kindly talking to them and then threatening to whoop ass hasn't worked. Good grief.

Two ideas:
1) Keep the unrefrigerated foods in a plastic bin under his bed.
Get a bedroom minifridge with a lock--I think that's possible. LOL

2) Keep the food in the main kitchen and put his name on it. Then put cat piss in the milk (or Mr Bubbles to be nice) and stuff the cereal boxes with styrofoam. Punk asses.

(If he chooses #2, make sure he has his own nonpiss and nonstyrofoam stash of food somewhere and he doesn't forget that the kitchen food is pissed off when he's trying to feed himself or guests.)

This was my first thought upon reading the OP. I fully endorse #1 and as hilarious it would be to do #2, I strongly suggest talking to the RA or equivalent. File a formal complaint then sit down and do the mediation. If they pull this shit again, then do #2 in a big way. At least you'll have a record of trying to work it out, and there will be proof of the roommate's douchebaggery (their complaints about the piss and packing peanuts).

Originally Posted by violetpretty

ROFL!! Those Kanye jokes will never get old to me.

[VandalSquirrel]

Wasabi fronting as avocado, benefiber in juice/ice tea/punch, horseradish with sour cream

and so on

[33girl]

Ex lax in brownies.

I take it these are just roomies he ended up with through luck of the draw and not people he actually knows.

Or, maybe your son should go ahead and get a meal plan. Aren't they mandatory anymore?

[carnation]

I'm back on and rolling on the floor at all this, calling all kinds of people to look at the thread, lol. Y'all are hysterical!

I think he has a 5-day meal plan and they have 3? Yes, they were luck of the draw although it turned out that one was a guy he barely knew from his high school.

[honeychile]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Ex lax in brownies.

I take it these are just roomies he ended up with through luck of the draw and not people he actually knows.

Or, maybe your son should go ahead and get a meal plan. Aren't they mandatory anymore?

I admit it - I've made the Exlax brownies. Didn't think I had it in me, did you? Just melt the Exlax, then stir into brownie mix and bake. It helps if you take one brownie out - then everyone thinks they're fair game.

I also posted a sign, "If you ask first, I'll probably let you have it. If you don't, careful what you eat."

[thetygerlily]

Originally Posted by honeychile

I admit it - I've made the Exlax brownies. Didn't think I had it in me, did you? Just melt the Exlax, then stir into brownie mix and bake. It helps if you take one brownie out - then everyone thinks they're fair game.

I also posted a sign, "If you ask first, I'll probably let you have it. If you don't, careful what you eat."

Honeychile, I'm impressed! What pushed you far enough to go there?

Originally Posted by Kappamd

Two thumbs up for the contraband George Foreman, lol. We had to hide our toaster as well.

Ha, we were allowed fridges and nothing else. One of the small upperclassmen dorms had mini-kitchens (basically fridge, microwave, counterspace, and cabinets)... we supplemented with a hot plate and toaster oven. Good thing we had plenty of cabinet space in case an RA dropped in! I distinctly recall baking a whole pumpkin pie and baked yams in that toaster oven... neither of which turned out very well. It worked for most other things! Desperation certainly brings plenty of creativity.

ETA: Regarding food theft, the only thing most people really didn't have was their own freezer (since those mini fridges are less than stellar). When stashing a pint of B&J in the freezer, I always kept it in a paper bag. That drastically reduced theft... it takes too much effort, apparently, to see what's there! Not sure that would work in this case, though, where the guys live in such tight quarters and they all know that your son's food is gold. So, perhaps some good-hearted sabotage is in order.