Caring for elders

[libramunoz]

Although she resists senior activities, try to get her into them. Suggest she be a Foster Grandparent and see if she'd like to become one at the local Elementary school. I think she'd be surprised at the activity that she could and will be able to do.

The resistance is coming from the feeling of the loss of independence. She feels somewhat that this is for "old" people and doesn't want to see herself as an "old" person. By pushing the senior activities, she will see that she isn't "old" and that she can still have vivacious fun, but she has to allow herself to see what the activities are. Try to get her to go for at least 2 days per week. She may find that she'll quite possibly want to go more.

Since you know that your mother does deal with depression, the senior activities will help in keeping her from following into parts of her depression. The Foster Grandparent is the greatest thing in the world!

See if she can be able to get a local senior citizens van to be able to come and pick her up. That's why she doesn't want to give up the driving. You may have to make a deal or slight contract with her for the driving issue. Try having her to call you when she NEEDS and only when she needs to drive herself somewhere. Let her know it's just a buddy system, that way she doesn't feel like she's losing her independence and having to check in with her child like a teenager and the roles have become reversed. If all else fails, talk with her about having a cab pick her up.

Always make sure that in her wallet, she has and ID card of some sort. If you are feeling or believing that she may become a victim of Alzheimers, it is the best thing to make sure that she has ID with ALL phone numbers and information, including her street address and your quickest cell number. Also to help with this, get her the medical alert bracelet that has the same information.

Also look into getting her the Emergency Medical Response necklace (you know, the one you see with C. Everett Koop, the I've fallen and I can't get up commercial). It may seem silly, but when you're at work, and if something does happen, all she will have to do is push this button. You can work with the company itself so that if the button is pushed, they will automatically alert you to the situation.

Also in her room, get a phone that has large enough dials and buttons that can light up at night. And get one that has the memory buttons that she can just push and it dials right away. The first number should always be 911, the second is you. It truly works.

For your peace of mind at night, get the baby monitor. Put one in her room and put one in your room. It can help you to check on her when she's asleep without having to upset her or indirectly wake her up.

As far as the floor, please, please make sure that you get the non skidding rugs and the houseshoes with traction on the bottom! I promise you, it will help her and you. It may be necessary for you to get grab bars in the hallways if you feel this will help her in stabilizing her walk.

The walk in shower is a great idea, but also make sure that they put in faucets that she cannot burn herself with, even if she turns the hot water on all the way. This will require you to change the thermostat on your water heater as well. Also make sure that you get a shower faucet head that has a removeable handle. It helps in being able to reach all places. Also with the walk in shower, make sure that either they build in a seat or that it would be large enough to put in a seat.