Ignored for a COB

[angels&angles]

I think the real lesson to take away from this, is that you shouldn't tell prospective COB girls that you're considering them. If txstategirl's friends hadn't told her that they were considering her, her feelings never would have been hurt. I'm sure they meant well, and they probably genuinely wanted her to join and for whatever reason, it didn't work out. But they probably should have checked before they told her. NMs, something to think about. (txstategirl, it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. Good luck with the rest of college!)

[33girl]

Originally Posted by angels&angles

I think the real lesson to take away from this, is that you shouldn't tell prospective COB girls that you're considering them. If txstategirl's friends hadn't told her that they were considering her, her feelings never would have been hurt. I'm sure they meant well, and they probably genuinely wanted her to join and for whatever reason, it didn't work out. But they probably should have checked before they told her. NMs, something to think about. (txstategirl, it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. Good luck with the rest of college!)

I kind of blame this on the sorority not STRESSING to the new pledges to keep their traps shut, if that is indeed where they got the names from. IMO they shouldn't be going to the pledges anyway, as the pledges know nothing about rating and voting and the standards the group has set. The rush chair should go straight to the Greek office and see who wasn't bid.

[Zillini]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I kind of blame this on the sorority not STRESSING to the new pledges to keep their traps shut, if that is indeed where they got the names from. IMO they shouldn't be going to the pledges anyway, as the pledges know nothing about rating and voting and the standards the group has set. The rush chair should go straight to the Greek office and see who wasn't bid.

Exactly. If a PNM was cut during Formal Recruitment there may have been a reason and that hasn't changed in the few weeks between Recruitment and COB events. It could have been anything from grades to standards issues to "she's dating my ex boyfriend". Obivously the new members who just pledged have no idea what that reason might be.

So while it is good to ask new members to provide names of girls they know to be considered for a COB event invite, they need to know they shouldn't even be implying it's a guaranteed invitation.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Zillini

Exactly. If a PNM was cut during Formal Recruitment there may have been a reason and that hasn't changed in the few weeks between Recruitment and COB events. It could have been anything from grades to standards issues to "she's dating my ex boyfriend". Obivously the new members who just pledged have no idea what that reason might be.

So while it is good to ask new members to provide names of girls they know to be considered for a COB event invite, they need to know they shouldn't even be implying it's a guaranteed invitation.

Very true. As has has been said before, NMs don't even know what goes into getting a bid. They could have mistakenly thought something like "if we invite her, she'll get a bid" which isn't the case.

At any rate, good luck with school and getting involved on campus!