No place for average PNMs?

[APhiAnna]

One situation that may make sense is if her daughter was invited back to all of her top choices in the earliest rounds. Therefore she eliminated the chapters who would have really wanted her, only to maybe make a "flub" or simply fall through the cracks during later rounds causing her to get cut by the chapters she had left, which were much more competitive sororities. I agree that it is extremely rare to get cut by all sororities at many campuses, but this scenario could make it plausible.

To kkgdgmom, I'm sorry if you feel my post was harsh, but I see it as a valid statement. You are doing the very thing that inspired me to write that post: to assume that all the blame for your daughter's recruitment was on the chapters and not on her. In order to grow I think your daughter (if she is even as upset as you are, she may be over it already) should sit down and try to think about what she did and how she can improve that aspect. It can be really hard, and I know it is a painful situation, but a victim mentality is always a hindrance to growth.

[UGAalum94]

Well, the possibility does exist that her daughter didn't do anything wrong, but simply didn't quite make it onto the bid lists at the chapters she went to for third round. Depending on those chapters' return rates, they may not get to pref very many girls. If they assumed she was going to go Kappa, they may have released her in favor of keeping someone they thought had a completely open mind.

We've talked on here before about how it's better sometimes to be cut hard in the early rounds so that you can finish out at the groups that are really interested. It may just be that she fell though the cracks through no real fault of her own.

On the other hand, kkgdgmom, sometimes the rest of the world doesn't see us as quite as amazing as our moms do. Your own evaluation of your daughter's relative strength in the PNM pool may be not be objective. She may not have come across as as interested and sweet as other PNMs. I think every chapter has girls that they liked who they release for one reason or another. As long as they end up with a pledge class they like, it doesn't really mean there's a problem with the whole system. Encourage your daughter to pursue COB if it's available on her campus. Or simply to get involved with other organizations to put her in the best position should she decide to re-rush. Or even just to move on with her life without worrying about being Greek. Life goes on.