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That previous night I wrote down:
Barcelona
Tokyo
And dropped:
New York
Los Angeles
That day I was so exciting for Pref! I just couldn't wait to see what sorority I would be in! There was a group of girls in my Freshman classes that were also going through recruitment. They were all very nervous, and I was the only one that was at least some one upbeat. We left early thanks to our amazing TA to get all dolled up, and then we left to go to the meeting place. I anxiously got my slip of paper from my Rho Gamma and it read:
New York
BREAK
My eyes went huge. I closed it. Then opened it again.
New York
BREAK
How could this happen?! Tears came to my eyes, and I tried my best to keep them from rolling down my cheeks. But soon there was a flood and my Rho Gamma quickly escorted me to the nearest bathroom and tried talking it over with her. I spilled about my legacy to Barcelona and how my mom was super involved. They told us not to use our cell phones after we got our houses for the night, but thankfully my Rho Gamma let me. I called my mom. She was furious. Not at me, at the house. (Typical mom from what I've seen as I've snooped around GC).
My Rho Gamma gave me the option of going to the house or not, but of course highly suggested that I did. I felt that I deserved to give them a chance so I went. They had vans outside to take all the PNM's to the houses since we were all in heels. There was about 10 PNM's left outside waiting for a van. I showed up with my Rho Gamma with my face all puffy and tears still rolling down. The girls looked at me like they wanted to help, but didn't know what to do. Eventually we found out that the vans weren't coming so we had to RUN 5 blocks. It actually felt really good cause I LOVE running.
Needless to say, we got there late and PNM's names were already being called. I stood there with everyone else crying my eyes out and got the same sympathetic looks from people. Everyone else's but mine got called, so they had a sister take me in and sit down with me. We talked and she let me cry. Then they had the president come out and talk to me. I didn't have the dinner there, but finally calmed down enough to join the others during the ceremony. I was still crying slightly and it was excruciatingly embarrassing. Finally they directed us outside, but all the PNM's had a sister to direct them where to go and I didn't. It was awkward but after a while a sister with another PNM picked me up and let me walk with them. By then the party was over.
I couldn't stand crying in front of people anymore and ran to my dorm. My roommate was unfortunately there and gave me sparkling lemonade which was supposed to be for when I pledged. Which just made me cry even more. Then she shoved Oreo's in my mouth which made me sick. And she had people in the room while I just cried in the corner.
My Rho Gamma called and asked if I would be back and I said that I couldn't possibly do it. So she told me to officially withdraw from recruitment at the Panhellenic office the next morning.
more to come...
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