NY Mom kicks kids out of car and drives off.

[BabyPiNK_FL]

I'm going to admit it my dad did this to me when I was very little. But I'd like to point out A) He didn't go very far, just drove away slowly and I could still see him, B) I knew how to get home since I was around the corner from the house (I was still crying terrified though!), and C) I NEVER acted up in the car again (although I don't remember what it was I was doing in the first place-and my mom honestly says I was an angel, especially compared to kids nowadays).

Sometimes when I hear stories like this I feel bad for the parents. There is only so much anyone can take, even if they are supposed to be the "grown up". Where she failed was when the other one got lost and the police had to get involved.

[PM_Mama00]

I hope the other daughter getting "lost" taught her a lesson. While I'm not a mother and I've never gone through the stresses of taking care of a child, I could NEVER see leaving a child somewhere. Those of you saying that it was done to you (though not as extreme) when you were younger... our world was a different place back then, when we could play in the street or go down to the park unsupervised and not having to worry about someone taking us.

Well-off neighborhood or not, you just can't chance something like this. Imagine if that good samaritan was someone who was up to no good and took that little girl. What kind of lesson is learned there?

[I.A.S.K.]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

What lesson have they learned, really?

According to other news sources, she called her town's police from HOME and reported the 10 year-old missing. The 12 year-old ran and caught up to the car. The fact that she managed to get the other kid, GO HOME, and then call the police is beyond the pale.

They should have learned to listen to their mother and know that she's not all talk and no action. They should realize that they are lucky to have a parent who is caring and behaving themselves is not much for their mom to ask in return.

Also, they lived like 3 miles from where the kids were let out. Driving the mom could get home in 3-5 minutes. My guess is that the mom expected both of them to catch up to her together and when they didnt she was alarmed. She may have gone back to the drop off spot to check or not. It makes sense to go home and call the cops if you live 3-5 minutes away and your kid is missing. You drop the 12 year old off at home call the cops and then proceed to search for the 10 year old.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by I.A.S.K.

They should have learned to listen to their mother and know that she's not all talk and no action. They should realize that they are lucky to have a parent who is caring and behaving themselves is not much for their mom to ask in return.

Also, they lived like 3 miles from where the kids were let out. Driving the mom could get home in 3-5 minutes. My guess is that the mom expected both of them to catch up to her together and when they didnt she was alarmed. She may have gone back to the drop off spot to check or not. It makes sense to go home and call the cops if you live 3-5 minutes away and your kid is missing. You drop the 12 year old off at home call the cops and then proceed to search for the 10 year old.

Unfortunately, they've learned that their mother is a hothead who, when faced with the same squabbles that virtually every other parent on this planet faces, risked her children's well-being--and her own career, I might add, to prove a point.

Also, she dropped them off in downtown White Plains. Although it's a pretty well-off town, downtown White Plains is home to a lot of major businesses. There are all sorts of people out there during the day. Anyone could have been there to pick that kid up. How close they were to home isn't an issue either--just look at the high percentage of kids who are abducted and killed within blocks of their homes. She's lucky that someone with only the best intentions got to her daughter before a pedophile or other creep!

[Little32]

I find this hilarious. Bet they stop fighting next time.

[DaemonSeid]

I'm sorry I am still kind of laughing at this:


The report does not say whether the girls had cell phones.

[AGDee]

It's definitely not the worst thing anybody has done to their kids. It's pretty mild, actually. These were 10 and 12 year olds, not 3 and 4 year olds. At 12, you're in 6th or 7th grade and old enough to know you should shut up when you're mom is getting to the end of her rope. At 12, you hang out at the mall with your friends, go to the movies without parents accompanying, come home to an empty house every day after school. 12 is old enough to babysit other kids. 10 is kind of young, but still old enough to know that you should shut up when your mom is near the end of her rope.

I would do this, and I would start to drive away, but then stop and make them get back in the car. I often threaten that I'm going to split the kids up so that when one is with me, the other is with dad and vice versa. That freaks them out and makes them behave for a while. I surely don't think that this one incident would warrant on contact with your kids, especially since I've seen kids who were getting the hell beaten out of them regularly have to stay in the home.

And yes, I'd wager that both girls own cell phones whether they had them with them at the time or not.

[KSig RC]

Downtown White Plains? A 3-mile walk?

How could children ever recover from such a harrowing experience?

Also, I'm no child psychologist, but doesn't the "fake-leave" only reinforce in children that Mom's threats are hollow, kind of like the "fake-grounding" and the "fake-no dinner" moves that are widely panned?

[DaemonSeid]

Originally Posted by KSig RC

Also, I'm no child psychologist, but doesn't the "fake-leave" only reinforce in children that Mom's threats are hollow, kind of like the "fake-grounding" and the "fake-no dinner" moves that are widely panned?

You haven't met my parents....hehe.

[libramunoz]

I'm sorry but I applaude the mother. She was able to show her kids that she meant business.
With some of these children now a days, they have gotten everything or nearly everything that they want and they haven't learned how to value things, like getting a car ride home.
I remember having to walk home from school (1 mile) as well as walking to school when I ws 12 and 11 years old. I had to get to ballet class in the 4th and 5th grade by walking 1 mile to the bus stop, then going to class (around 5pm) and then catching the bus that would take me into Pasadena and wait for my mom to pick me up at the bus stop (around 6:30pm). Hell, at 12, believe me, that kid knew she was pissing off her mother, she knew that she needed to shut up and she knew that she needed to sit her ass down and calm herself down. No, what did she do, she continued to act a fool in the car, squabble with her sister, and drive her mother nuts.
How many times does the Mom have to tell you to shut the f$#%#@ $% up before you get it?
They don't allow the parents to actively discipline the children today and wonder why some children act silly. Then they give them the dx of Autism or ADHD or something else that could easily be solved with a good ass whipping. Sorry, I don't feel bad for this mother, I feel that she did what was right. She was giving the children what they did need, discipline.

[honeychile]

If the mother had enforced what she said 8-10 years ago, she wouldn't have had the problems she has now. My mother (winner of the iron hand in the velvet glove award for several consecutive years) would not have done that, but she most certainly would have pulled the car over and demanded silence before continuing. These little darlings will probably need psychiatric care and/or try to emancipate themselves at any time now.

[DaemonSeid]

Originally Posted by honeychile

If the mother had enforced what she said 8-10 years ago, she wouldn't have had the problems she has now. My mother (winner of the iron hand in the velvet glove award for several consecutive years) would not have done that, but she most certainly would have pulled the car over and demanded silence before continuing. These little darlings will probably need psychiatric care and/or try to emancipate themselves at any time now.

Or better yet, told thenm before they went out the door, "Act like you got some dayum sense and don't embrrass me."

My mom is a certified spankologist

[paulam]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

Or better yet, told thenm before they went out the door, "Act like you got some dayum sense and don't embrrass me."

My mom is a certified spankologist

Discipline must begin right away in a loving way. It must happen immediately so a small child attaches consequences to his behavior. My mother had the "look". I would rather she had beaten me than to get that look that said, "I am so disappointed in you." I tried the look on my boys and they fell on the floor laughing!

Anyway, the disappearing mom put both her daughters in danger, even three miles from her home. Predators travel to nice neighborhoods all the time. She could have separated the girls, moving the older one to the front seat. She could have used a reward system for good behavior. Abandoning them will do nothing for the girls, except make them afraid of their weird mother.

That will be $.02!

Paula M
Sigma Delta Tau
Patrae Multi Spes Una
One hope of Many People

[paulam]

Originally Posted by honeychile

If the mother had enforced what she said 8-10 years ago, she wouldn't have had the problems she has now. My mother (winner of the iron hand in the velvet glove award for several consecutive years) would not have done that, but she most certainly would have pulled the car over and demanded silence before continuing. These little darlings will probably need psychiatric care and/or try to emancipate themselves at any time now.

Many years ago, we were dining in a nice restaurant with our two sons who were about 12 and 10. They always behaved well in restaurants because they loved eating out and knew that the only way they could go the next time, was to behave this time.

There was a family sitting at the next table with two boys a little younger than ours. The boys were just terrible. They yelled and were so disruptive. Then they began running through the restaurant forcing the waiters carrying heavy trays laden with hot food to have to dodge them.

I could picture an incident where one of the waiters dropped his tray and burned one or both of the boys and I vowed that I would be a witness for the restaurant when the parents sued!

I gave the mother the "look" that my mother used to give me if I ever (rarely) misbehaved. Her reaction was to shrug her shoulders and grimace as though there was nothing she could do about her childrens' reprehensible behavior. It was not the fault of these poor kids. The inmates ran that asylum. I wonder what happened to them now that they are grown.

Parents do not their children any favors by bringing them into the world and then throwing them out into society for the rest of us to deal with. There is no owner's manual but there are books and parenting classes and friends and family if a parent doesn't know how to gain control of his or her child while there is still time to mold him or her into a civilized, productive member of society.

So "mommy dearest" is a high powered lawyer. Big deal. She is a total failure as a parent, the most important job she will ever have. How sad.

Paula M.
Sigma Delta Tau
Patrae Multi Spes Una
One Hope of Many People

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by paulam

So "mommy dearest" is a high powered lawyer. Big deal. She is a total failure as a parent, the most important job she will ever have. How sad.

Save the histrionics -- a total failure as a parent she is not.