Advice about engagement

[phisiglindsey]

If you are engaged to someone, you should be able to bring up the issue of finances. 3 years is a long time, but a VERY significant time to get your finances in order. Take the time to sit down with your fiance and figure the issues out. Even though you are unsure of what to do as far as your career, it is never too late to start saving and paying off debt. I wouldn't want to marry into debt.

[AGDee]

I think it's fine to be engaged for a long time if you wait until the finances are stable to get married. I wouldn't be setting a wedding date until both of you are working in your chosen careers.

[Munchkin03]

I'm of the school where you don't even GET engaged without having a talk about financial goals like retirement; also, by the time you're in that serious of a relationship, you should be able to tell for yourself how your significant other is about savings, debt (good and bad), and that sort of thing.

I was on the way to getting engaged, and I saw for myself how my ex was with money (we were both in school before that and didn't see how our financial goals differed), and I ended it without looking back. I didn't want a life of living paycheck-to-paycheck. Also, I realized how his family differed from mine in terms of saving for retirement, the fact that they didn't treat their home equity like an ATM, and all that good stuff. We had completely different values when it came to what we considered a "comfortable lifestyle," and that was too much for me to handle.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

I'm of the school where you don't even GET engaged without having a talk about financial goals like retirement; also, by the time you're in that serious of a relationship, you should be able to tell for yourself how your significant other is about savings, debt (good and bad), and that sort of thing.

This is SO important. So many people ignore this aspect of their relationship, because "they're im love, and money doesn't matter." If you aren't ready to have a serious talk about money, you aren''t ready to get married.

Finances do matter. If you both view finances totally differently, it will most likely cause some problems in your relationship. For example, if your financial goals include saving for a home and for retirement, but your fiance gets payday loans every week and pays his bills whenever he feels like it, that's going to cause alot of conflict in your marriage.