how do sororities decide?

[Zillini]

Originally Posted by alphagamzetagam

More damage is done to a chapter by tent talk than a sister saying hello to a PNM when she's not supposed to.

Isn't that the truth!!!!

[srmom]

And she will have to live with the decision she made. In the future, she may rue the choice, maybe not, who knows.

But, bullying people into making, what for them is, a wrong choice is not going to strengthen a struggling chapter. Unhappy, complaining new pledges - poisoning the entire pledge class - is worse in my opinion.

This gal decided it wasn't for her - so be it.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by srmom

Nowhere in your posts did you say that you felt you were "better" than the house that you dropped, nor did you say that they were "beneath" you.

I believe the phrase "not worth the trouble" is the thing the OP said that stuck in people's craws. It's unquestionably a very dismissive thing to say.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I believe the phrase "not worth the trouble" is the thing the OP said that stuck in people's craws. It's unquestionably a very dismissive thing to say.

Right. I think people were just wondering, how do you know it's not worth the trouble if you don't go?

[LadyLonghorn]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I believe the phrase "not worth the trouble" is the thing the OP said that stuck in people's craws. It's unquestionably a very dismissive thing to say.

Exactly. The other sororities would have been worth the effort of getting out on her bad foot.

[srmom]

I'm sorry, I just have to chuckle at the whole bad foot thing... That just strikes me as funny.

[ThetaDancer]

Originally Posted by srmom

I'm sorry, I just have to chuckle at the whole bad foot thing... That just strikes me as funny.

Same here. Especially since the OP called it an "extreme inconvenience." Please

[Thetagirl218]

Originally Posted by TriDeltaSallie

There is a possibility that seems to have been overlooked. It is possible that the poster is a Christian and was only invited back to one of the predominantly Jewish sororities. If this were the case, it wouldn't make sense for her to return if she felt she could never be comfortable there.

While I don't personally know about being a Christian in a Jewish based sorority; however, I have Theta sisters who are Jewish and being in Theta was never a problem. I am sure there are girls who Christians who also in NPC sororities based off of Jewish principles.

[Low C Sharp]

Oh please. Whenever a PMN comes here complaining about being cut from all chapters except one or two, it's never because they weren't cut from the "top tier/beautiful model/rocket scientist/fraternity favorite/insert your tent talk hyperbole here." It's always because they "don't click/fit in" with the "struggling/smallest/fatty/ugly/lamest/insert your tent talk smash and bash here." They don't want to be one of those.

It's like a secret code that few here want to admit. And it's the reason why struggling chapters continue into a death spiral in spite of RFM.

That's generally true. But I can't see that as evil/bad/wrong. It's not the job of any PNM to do what's best for the struggling chapter or bring them out of their death spiral. It's her job to decide what will be a good use of her limited time and money in college.

The other secret code is that it may not be any fun to be the campus whipping boy (girl?). Yes, every PNM should be encouraged to give it a shot at pref. But I am not going to hold it against any teenager who decides that she doesn't want to spend money to be labeled as struggling/smallest/fatty/ugly/lamest right off the bat in college. Both shallow snots and wonderful human beings may come to that conclusion. The reason for the secret code is that if a PNM actually admitted that on GC, she'd be run out of town on a virtual rail.

[TriDeltaSallie]

Originally Posted by LadyLonghorn

Oh please. Whenever a PMN comes here complaining about being cut from all chapters except one or two, it's never because they weren't cut from the "top tier/beautiful model/rocket scientist/fraternity favorite/insert your tent talk hyperbole here." It's always because they "don't click/fit in" with the "struggling/smallest/fatty/ugly/lamest/insert your tent talk smash and bash here." They don't want to be one of those.

I disagree because this would be making assumptions. While what you are saying may often be true, we can't assume that it is true of every PNM who posts here.

As Greek women we fight stereotypes all the time. We, of all people, should be going out of our way to avoid stereotyping others.

And, no, not everyone who goes through rush wants to be in a top house. There are plenty of women who intuitively know that they would not be a good fit for them for whatever reason.

[UGAalum94]

Originally Posted by Low C Sharp

That's generally true. But I can't see that as evil/bad/wrong. It's not the job of any PNM to do what's best for the struggling chapter or bring them out of their death spiral. It's her job to decide what will be a good use of her limited time and money in college.

The other secret code is that it may not be any fun to be the campus whipping boy (girl?). Yes, every PNM should be encouraged to give it a shot at pref. But I am not going to hold it against any teenager who decides that she doesn't want to spend money to be labeled as struggling/smallest/fatty/ugly/lamest right off the bat in college. Both shallow snots and wonderful human beings may come to that conclusion. The reason for the secret code is that if a PNM actually admitted that on GC, she'd be run out of town on a virtual rail.

I agree with what you are saying generally.

It's just hard to repeatedly hear or read the same stuff without simply wanting people to be more aware. If all the groups but one drop you, perhaps it makes the most sense to look at the one you have left rather than trying to figure out how you can game the system the second time through, especially seeing as you really can't do anything about how the groups do membership selection.

[epchick]

Originally Posted by TriDeltaSallie

As Greek women we fight stereotypes all the time. We, of all people, should be going out of our way to avoid stereotyping others.

Why? We are human, it's human nature to do things like that.

Stop putting "Greek women" on a pedastal, acting like we are these high and might people that need to educate the masses about GLOs.

[UGAalum94]

TriDeltaSallie,

I agree with a lot of what you are saying, but there's a never ending cycle of this stuff. After a while it make you wonder if there could really be that many clueless pnms out there and you start to suspect it's the sassy girls entertaining themselves with sock puppets or random trolls.

If you want to reach out with sympathetic personal messages, more power to you, but no PNM can expect general public support here if she seems to have discounted one or more chapters if thread history is any indication.

And I'll be honest*, it should only take one post of "we can't answer that because it's MS" before a PNM gets the message. This one has been way too persistent about stuff that's not any of her business.

*although I relate to curiosity about the process because even now I find it fascinating and I'm long past the point when it affects me personally

[FrogChick]

I wonder what it would be like if the sororities merely accepted PNM's who wanted to join their sorority (informed PNM's...I mean who attended recruitment) as long as there was space for them. Would it be so hard to imagine?

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by FrogChick

I wonder what it would be like if the sororities merely accepted PNM's who wanted to join their sorority (informed PNM's...I mean who attended recruitment) as long as there was space for them. Would it be so hard to imagine?

Imagine as in desirable?

:::Shudders at the thought:::