Unusual sighting- etiquette of it?

[Tippiechick]

Originally Posted by Scandia

Well guess what- I saw the gentleman wearing it today again.

He came to the reference desk asking for directions to a place. He barely spoke English- so we switched to my native language. Due to his accent, I could tell that he was not originally from the USA- this is probably relevant.

I asked him about his hat- if he had a daughter or friend in the GLO. He said the hat had been given to him. He seemed very confused when I asked him about the letters. I told him that they belonged to a sorority called "Upsilon Upsilon" (not its real name, of course). Transaction went well and he was always very polite- but I could tell that he had been given the hat as a clothing donation.

I know you probably don't realize this... BUT... You just may have embarrassed him for no good reason.

Are you just an idiot or a bitch? Because, you had a WHOLE thread of people telling you to LET IT GO. But, did you? NO. Scandia, you HAD to "inform" him of his hat's significance. If you knew he spoke Spanish as a first language, that due to his accent he was most likely NOT even originally from here, AND that it WAS most likely a DONATION -- why did you continue to bother him about it?

Did you think it would make the world better to inform him of his faux pas?

What is it you tried to accomplish? Because, all you really did was to (probably) make him self-conscious of wearing a hat that before had just been a hat. Now, he'll know that every time he wears it, someone may see the letters and confront him.

I SWEAR you have no fucking sense.

[kddani]

Originally Posted by Tippiechick

I know you probably don't realize this... BUT... You just may have embarrassed him for no good reason.

Are you just an idiot or a bitch? Because, you had a WHOLE thread of people telling you to LET IT GO. But, did you? NO. Scandia, you HAD to "inform" him of his hat's significance. If you knew he spoke Spanish as a first language, that due to his accent he was most likely NOT even originally from here, AND that it WAS most likely a DONATION -- why did you continue to bother him about it?

Did you think it would make the world better to inform him of his faux pas?

What is it you tried to accomplish? Because, all you really did was to (probably) make him self-conscious of wearing a hat that before had just been a hat. Now, he'll know that every time he wears it, someone may see the letters and confront him.

I SWEAR you have no fucking sense.

Tippie, my compass points to you!

Originally Posted by kddani

Tippie, my compass points to you!

[Tippiechick]

Originally Posted by kddani

Tippie, my compass points to you!

Bwaaaahhhh. PRICELESS.

[LadyLonghorn]

In honor of sheet cake. To protect and serve.

[icelandelf]

Originally Posted by Tippiechick

Did you think it would make the world better to inform him of his faux pas?

I thought I felt a ripple in the Force today. And now all is well.

I feel safe knowing that the letter police are out and tactfully taking down evildoers everywhere.

[indygphib]

Originally Posted by Tippiechick

I know you probably don't realize this... BUT... You just may have embarrassed him for no good reason.

Are you just an idiot or a bitch? Because, you had a WHOLE thread of people telling you to LET IT GO. But, did you? NO. Scandia, you HAD to "inform" him of his hat's significance. If you knew he spoke Spanish as a first language, that due to his accent he was most likely NOT even originally from here, AND that it WAS most likely a DONATION -- why did you continue to bother him about it?

Did you think it would make the world better to inform him of his faux pas?

What is it you tried to accomplish? Because, all you really did was to (probably) make him self-conscious of wearing a hat that before had just been a hat. Now, he'll know that every time he wears it, someone may see the letters and confront him.

I SWEAR you have no fucking sense.

This thread just got a hell of a lot more interesting. Thanks Tippie!

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by Tippiechick

I know you probably don't realize this... BUT... You just may have embarrassed him for no good reason.

Are you just an idiot or a bitch? Because, you had a WHOLE thread of people telling you to LET IT GO. But, did you? NO. Scandia, you HAD to "inform" him of his hat's significance. If you knew he spoke Spanish as a first language, that due to his accent he was most likely NOT even originally from here, AND that it WAS most likely a DONATION -- why did you continue to bother him about it?

Did you think it would make the world better to inform him of his faux pas?

What is it you tried to accomplish? Because, all you really did was to (probably) make him self-conscious of wearing a hat that before had just been a hat. Now, he'll know that every time he wears it, someone may see the letters and confront him.

I SWEAR you have no fucking sense.

1. Just because Scandia asked for thoughts on the situation did not mean that she had to do what people said to do.

2. Do you think you are representing yourself or any organization you may belong to by ranting like this? Is the profanity really necessary? No wait. A better question is why that kind of language is even allowed on the
board.

3. I think you all are making too big of a deal about what she did. It didn't sound like she humiliated him. It sounded more like they had a conversation and she simply told him what the significance was of the letters on the hat. So what? That wouldn't be the first time that someone informed someone who wasn't from this country about what something means.

[icelandelf]

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

1. Just because Scandia asked for thoughts on the situation did not mean that she had to do what people said to do.

2. Do you think you are representing yourself or any organization you may belong to by ranting like this? Is the profanity really necessary? No wait. A better question is why that kind of language is even allowed on the
board.

3. I think you all are making too big of a deal about what she did. It didn't sound like she humiliated him. It sounded more like they had a conversation and she simply told him what the significance was of the letters on the hat. So what? That wouldn't be the first time that someone informed someone who wasn't from this country about what something means.

ha ha ha ha

ETA: one more Ha

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by icelandelf

ha ha ha ha

ETA: one more Ha

What my sister said. Plus one. Ha!

[Xidelt]

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

1. Just because Scandia asked for thoughts on the situation did not mean that she had to do what people said to do.

2. Do you think you are representing yourself or any organization you may belong to by ranting like this? Is the profanity really necessary? No wait. A better question is why that kind of language is even allowed on the
board.

3. I think you all are making too big of a deal about what she did. It didn't sound like she humiliated him. It sounded more like they had a conversation and she simply told him what the significance was of the letters on the hat. So what? That wouldn't be the first time that someone informed someone who wasn't from this country about what something means.

Isn't there somebody out perping your org that you need to go get all upset about?

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

You need a hobby.

WOW, KSUV got snarky! I need to play the numbers tomorrow!

Originally Posted by Tippiechick

She has one... Remember the cosplay/doll thing she does... She just needs a life.

Gross-a-roo......

Originally Posted by LadyLonghorn

What a great way to snatch away the dignity of an already downtrodden person in the name of petty personal interests. This poor man was given the hat out of kindness and for all you know could be the only one he owns. Thanks to you he gets to be self conscious about wearing it. Since he was polite in what was the undoubtedly uncomfortable situation you placed him in, it's good to see that one person in this "transaction" has an understanding of etiquette. I hope you are proud of yourself.

One of my former students wore a HUGE Kappa Alpha Psi quilted jacket to a parent meeting one day. I though to myself "Self, that's something you don't see every day. A Latino Kappa in his 40s. I wonder where he went to school. Wow, and he doesn't speak English.... oh wait, he's not a Kappa. Awwww " And that's where it ended.

If I had another, better coat to give him, I would have traded him for it JUST to avoid him having embarrassing or potentially threatening situations because of it. But I didn't, so I minded my business.

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

I guess my only issue is that since you're a public librarian (and regardless of GLO clothing), if he feels uncomfortable because you pointed out he has womens clothing on he may not come back to the library out of shame and he may need the resources a public library has to offer. If he is not a person with English as a first language and different cultural attitudes, that sort of nosiness may actually hinder what you try to accomplish as a librarian. My understanding is that you're supposed to help people, even if you're not a fan of what they want to kn ow or their choice in research, and send them on their merry way with warm librarian fuzzies.

So I guess this can also extend to someone who is questioning their gender, or in the midst of changing their gender, or is transgendered, and if they are coming to a public library with alleged equal access for all, it can be a huge problem. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE judging people (especially those with Goach bags or fugly crocs), but there is a time and place and I really think it goes against librarian ethics to ask him, especially once you realized English was not his first language. Maybe you disagree with say, premarital sex, but if a patron asks you for information, you're supposed to do it without judgment or comment.

Who's the librarian police, Nancy Pearl?

I really like you.

Originally Posted by Xidelt

Isn't there somebody out perping your org that you need to go get all upset about?

FTW, with an assist:

Originally Posted by Senusret I

WOW, KSUV got snarky!

I thought that too. I wanted to run up and down the street and celebrate.

FTW, with an assist:

FTW INDEED.

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by nittanyalum

And all I can say is, WOW, if KSUViolet's even in here talking smack, that's sayin' somethin!

(and by the way, keep it up, KSUV, I love that side of you! )

Originally Posted by OTW

I thought that too. I wanted to run up and down the street and celebrate.

It always starts with one snarky comment. 18 months later, she'll be the female version of me and everyone will wonder what went wrong.

Welcome to the dark side, KSUV.

[DrPhil]

I don't think I would've said anything to him. However, I have given polite and even jokingly serious advice to people who unknowingly, or knowingly, wore an organization's letters. I'd rather I neutrally say something than for them to run across a lunatic member.

This is not one of those instances. Similarly, years ago, we were doing service at a food bank and a homeless man saw our lettered tshirts and took off his jacket to show us that he had on our symbols. We stopped and stared at him because it took us off guard. But when he got in line for his pancakes and sausages, we didn't say anything to him. Not knowing this man's education level or story (since there are homeless people with degrees and who are members of sororities and fraternities), we assumed that he knows where he got the shirt from and knows that the shirt probably belonged to something he 1) may know nothing about and 2) obviously isn't a member of. No point in going any further.

We have been laughing at that story for 10 years.

I do think that some people are overreacting to Scandia. And she's silly for giving you all an update. LOL.