Help!!!

[ASTCutie]

Hey...Thanks for all of your help. Its an issue because I have tried to give the letters back many times and he wont take them back. He is like I would rather you burn them then give them back to me but of course I do not want to do that. I have decided to keep them in a box with some of my other sorority stuff and just not wear them ever again. That way I still have the memories from them but wear the letters of my fiance. Thanks for all of your help!!!

[Kansas City]

Originally Posted by ASTCutie

Hey...Thanks for all of your help. Its an issue because I have tried to give the letters back many times and he wont take them back. He is like I would rather you burn them then give them back to me but of course I do not want to do that. I have decided to keep them in a box with some of my other sorority stuff and just not wear them ever again. That way I still have the memories from them but wear the letters of my fiance. Thanks for all of your help!!!

Have you thought about returning them to his fraternity house or HQ? I personally think that it would be kind of creepy to keep such a memento from a past relationship. I mean ... really ... it is just a piece of jewelry.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Kansas City

Have you thought about returning them to his fraternity house or HQ? I personally think that it would be kind of creepy to keep such a memento from a past relationship. I mean ... really ... it is just a piece of jewelry.

I would disagree. I was never lavaliered, but I do have certain things that ex's have given to me (I try to keep to to 2 things or less), and they kinda just come with me. My current boyfriend and I moved in together, and he gets that he was not my first relationship, and is ok with the fact that I have 1 or 2 things from former relationships that just kinda hang around. I don't point out that I have them, we don't talk about who gave me this or that, in fact, a lot of the things that I have he is unaware that another boyfriend gave them to me. I do know, too, that he has a couple of things former girlfriends have given him. I'm ok with that, I was the one he chose to move in with.

Keeping mementos is a natural thing. It might be harder to hide letters to ex-bf's fraternity, but if she keeps them away and not displayed all over the place, I don't see a problem with it unless her current boyfriend (and hopefully, future fiance!) has a problem with it. That's really something she'll have to talk to him about.

ETA: I keep all my sorority stuff in the spare bedroom, along with things that are "just mine." I felt like current bf, because he was a GDI, may not be comfortable with paddles on the wall, pictures of me and sisters on the wall, a big 'ole pillow with Alpha Gam letters on it. He calls it "sorority land."

[33girl]

It's inappropriate to drag his whole fraternity into it. The fraternity didn't lavalier her, he did. If he won't accept her trying to return stuff, packing it away is really the best solution.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by 33girl

It's inappropriate to drag his whole fraternity into it. The fraternity didn't lavalier her, he did. If he won't accept her trying to return stuff, packing it away is really the best solution.

Especially because there's the whole embarrassment factor added in with taking stuff back to the house. There were a few couples on my campus where the girl had to take back all the stuff and all she got was heckled. So much for the fraternity loving her!

[Kansas City]

Originally Posted by alphagamzetagam

Especially because there's the whole embarrassment factor added in with taking stuff back to the house. There were a few couples on my campus where the girl had to take back all the stuff and all she got was heckled. So much for the fraternity loving her!

Plain brown envelope addressed to HQ or campus house, an explanation note is not necessary. There is no reason to create drama by personally returning it.