Why Haze!!

[ASTalumna06]

It just makes me laugh that you say that because I haven’t experienced it, I don’t understand. I understand plenty of what I haven’t experienced. And if you’re telling me that people ONLY learn through experience, then you’re sadly mistaken. Because I can tell you that to get stabbed is bad, I can tell you that if you jump out of an airplane, you will fall very quickly to the ground, and I can tell you that if you taunt a barracuda, there’s a pretty good chance he’ll bite your sorry ass. But I’ve never done any of those things.

You talk to me as if I have never heard a story about what other chapters do for hazing. I have heard first hand what some people do. And for some, running around campus, being covered in eggs, doing 500 push-ups, doing laundry for your big, and being otherwise belittled by the people who are supposed to be your “brothers”, etc., etc., etc., isn’t something that they’re willing to do to be part of an organization. And personally, I commend them for it.

Because I KNOW I wouldn’t want that done to me. And that’s not me being naïve because I haven’t experienced it. That’s not me not being able to handle it. That’s me making a personal choice based on the fact that I know those things suck. And I don’t have to prove myself to anyone by having them embarrass me and do things that may scar me emotionally.

I don’t haze anyone because I don’t pretend to know anyone. I don’t pretend to think that everyone is mentally healthy. Because THAT would be naïve. And I don’t pretend that nothing happens to anyone, ever.

Example: The mother of one of my sisters died last semester. This girl is a little more emotional than others in general, so when this happened, it took her a long time to even be able to come around the chapter because everyone was having a good time. SHE HAD A HARD TIME ENJOYING HERSELF because she almost thought she shouldn’t be happy. A lot of people do that when they lose a loved one, and if that happened to one of your pledges and you weren’t having fun, but instead were harassing him, I guarantee there’s a pretty good chance you could permanently push him away.

The only advice I can give you is not to assume that everyone is as “perfect” as you are. Everyone has their own issues to deal with, and everyone has pasts that you know nothing about. So to assume that you are above those who don’t want to be humiliated is rather pathetic in my opinion.

[MysticCat]

^^^ Why are you arguing with an idiot? If you really need to get it out of your system, you'd have more luck with a brick wall.

Some posters really are best ignored.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

^^^ Why are you arguing with an idiot? If you really need to get it out of your system, you'd have more luck with a brick wall.

Some posters really are best ignored.

Amen.

That viewpoint may very well be why his small town fraternity is in need of help.

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

Amen.

That viewpoint may very well be why his small town fraternity is in need of help.

And yes, I just found that. It was him. I even commented on that post to try and help him. haha

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

^^^ Why are you arguing with an idiot? If you really need to get it out of your system, you'd have more luck with a brick wall.

Some posters really are best ignored.

Yes, but I enjoy looking intelligent

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

Yes, but I enjoy looking intelligent

Arguing with a brick wall doesn't make you look intelligent.

[ASTalumna06]

Hm... yea, yelling at brick walls would probably make me look crazy

Funny thing is, in the middle of me typing that last post, he sent me a PM begging me to respond to his post.

He begs for attention, says that I don't know that getting stabbed is bad because I haven't experienced it, asks for recruitment help in another thread because their chapter has 3 members, and then wonders why people tell him not to haze.

damn.

[one800thekiller]

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

It just makes me laugh that you say that because I haven’t experienced it, I don’t understand. I understand plenty of what I haven’t experienced. And if you’re telling me that people ONLY learn through experience, then you’re sadly mistaken. Because I can tell you that to get stabbed is bad, I can tell you that if you jump out of an airplane, you will fall very quickly to the ground, and I can tell you that if you taunt a barracuda, there’s a pretty good chance he’ll bite your sorry ass. But I’ve never done any of those things.

You talk to me as if I have never heard a story about what other chapters do for hazing. I have heard first hand what some people do. And for some, running around campus, being covered in eggs, doing 500 push-ups, doing laundry for your big, and being otherwise belittled by the people who are supposed to be your “brothers”, etc., etc., etc., isn’t something that they’re willing to do to be part of an organization. And personally, I commend them for it.

Because I KNOW I wouldn’t want that done to me. And that’s not me being naïve because I haven’t experienced it. That’s not me not being able to handle it. That’s me making a personal choice based on the fact that I know those things suck. And I don’t have to prove myself to anyone by having them embarrass me and do things that may scar me emotionally.

I don’t haze anyone because I don’t pretend to know anyone. I don’t pretend to think that everyone is mentally healthy. Because THAT would be naïve. And I don’t pretend that nothing happens to anyone, ever.

Example: The mother of one of my sisters died last semester. This girl is a little more emotional than others in general, so when this happened, it took her a long time to even be able to come around the chapter because everyone was having a good time. SHE HAD A HARD TIME ENJOYING HERSELF because she almost thought she shouldn’t be happy. A lot of people do that when they lose a loved one, and if that happened to one of your pledges and you weren’t having fun, but instead were harassing him, I guarantee there’s a pretty good chance you could permanently push him away.

The only advice I can give you is not to assume that everyone is as “perfect” as you are. Everyone has their own issues to deal with, and everyone has pasts that you know nothing about. So to assume that you are above those who don’t want to be humiliated is rather pathetic in my opinion.

AS i said, i'm not one to say that doing laundry, or pushups, or being covered with eggs serves a higher purpose, because it doesn't........at least not to my knowledge?

I am just stating that it is an assumption on your part that all hazing is bad.
That is all. I am not saying anything about learning simply by doing. I am saying that unless you have experienced something like hazing first hand, you are putting a certain amount of trust in someone else, in that everything they are telling you is true and accurate.

As far as not knowing a pledges past, and therefor they could be mentally unstable......we are a small enough organization that we get to know the potentials long before even the rush party.

In reference to your concern for pushing pledges away because of how we treat them, i agree.

In pledging it is a constant push-pull system

you pull them in, and then you push them away, and then you pull them in again..thats just how it happens

If a major issue has happened in a pledges life, i'm aware of it as soon as it happens, and i will deal with it appropriately.

That is what most people don't understand. Yes, there might be hazing in certain organizations, but as soon as a brother(or eve a pledge) is going through a tough time, EVERY MEMBER is right there with them, ready to help in ANY way possible. I do take care of my pledges, and I do take care of my brothers.

My fraternity isn't nearly as concerned with quantity as we are quality...
I would rather have 3 pledges make it through..and them be the ones that worked their asses of and put there heart and soul into the process..and their trust into the brotherhood than i would 15 people who half assed an easier less demanding process