Retro Recruitment:: a brutally honest story

[tangelo212]

Originally Posted by aprocess

I basically would only do Marissa and Ryan. No chance for anyone else. I hyped myself up for it. I went through my entire cloet finding things that Marissa and Ryan would like. I amped myself up like crazy. So excited!!!!

I figured since this is a retro thread that you were trying to set up the storyline....
20/20 hindsight definitely makes a story read quite differently than a live one!

And you ARE being brutally honest.

[aprocess]

Originally Posted by tangelo212

I figured since this is a retro thread that you were trying to set up the storyline....
20/20 hindsight definitely makes a story read quite differently than a live one!

And you ARE being brutally honest.

I hope my honest recollection will help PNM's

My entire freshman year I heard tons of stereotypes of the different sororities.

Here were the sorority tiers (each person was definitely biased, so again take this info with a grain of salt). I am saying the tiers to prove a point. If you would like to know why it was tiered this way, PM me and i will write you.

Top
Jenny and Ryan
Serena
Dan
Vanessa
Blair

Bottom
Marissa and Nate
Summer
Seth
Chuck


HERE ARE THINGS I HAVE LEARNED:

1) DO NOT BE STUBBORN!!!! everyone on GC and during recruitment said to have an open mind. Have an open mind EACH DAY of recruitment.go through the ENTIRE process and pick what you think is best for you ONLY at pref. You meet ppl everyday that will be swinging your vote. Getting so attatched after 45 min of visiting a house is not rational.

2) DO NOT listen to tent talk. Some PNM's are telling you their favorite houses suck. This is so you will rank them low and they will rank them high. Yes, in some schools- including mine- this does happen. Therefore, keep your mouth shut and do what you believe is for you.

[aprocess]

Nate Archibald- I went in with a total open mind. I remember talking to 3 girls. it was nice.

Chuck Bass- again, the house just felt so barren. 2 PNM's per an active. When the active found out I was a sophomore, she kind of stopped talking to me and only concentrated on the other freshman PNM

Blair Waldorf- i had a letter of rec to this house. One of my friends' girlfriends was in this house 2 and I ended up talking to her a lot. I do not remember much of the conversations though.

Serena van der Woodsen- this house was still way dark. But i had an amazing conversation with this one girl. She was so funny. I remember talking to her about gilmore girls. We also talked alot about the dance team (I was going to audition and shes been in dance forever). i remember laughing like crazy with her.

Dan Humphrey- I have been to this house several times and knew just about every girl because of cassie. Cassie came and said a quick hi, i know she was busy doing whatever she had to do on her side of recruitment. I love Cassie, but I knew I wasn't a Dan. I think she knew it too.

Vanessa Abrams- This house still felt like home. I got into a conversation with the girl about their house cook and how he made these excellent desserts. we laughed.

Jenny Humphrey- One of my floormates was a Jenny. We loved each other, so I was excited to come here. Since I knew the area of the school better, we talked about the shopping and boutiques in the area that we liked.

Ryan Atwood- again, was everyone in this house blonde? man. I did not know anyone in this house, but i just went in and hoped for the best. i got seated with this one girl who ended up knowing one of my best guy friends. we talked about the funny shenanigans he pulled.

Seth Cohen- I knew a girl here who deactivated. She ended up telling alot of the sororities secrets to anyone who would listen. this made me sad. i didnt say her name or ask about it during this recruitment party. nice girls, not for me.

Marissa Cooper- this house still had the home feel. (FLASH FORWARD: remember that guy on the yacht that i knew from my hometown? well after recruitment, i talked to him a few times and was like 'duuuddde you went on a yacht for a sorority event?' and he told me a few things. This guy was one of the most 'popular' guys in his high school and was infamous for cheating on girls. I know thats not commendable, but I've known him for years. Turns out he dated that girl in the sorority for like 2-3 years and cheated on her. all of the sisters of marissa hated him). I was respectful and nice during the recruitment party but decided that my friendship with a person I have known for over 5 years was more worth it.

Summer Roberts- this house was nice. I was paired with an eager freshman PNM and didnt have much room to talk

now to the ranking

1 Serena
1 Ryan
1 Jenny
1 Nate
1 Blair
1 Summer
1 Vanessa
1 Dan

2 Chuck
3 Seth
4 Marissa

Since i was a sophomore and recruitment is pretty competitive, I would be happy with one from my tops. I did not expect a full schedule. I was just trying to keep an open mind.

OK GCer's bed time. Day 2 is to come.

[aprocess]

I remember feeling a HUGE deja vu at this point. I remember walking up to our group leader and getting my paper that had my schedule. I didnt even look at it!!!

I just started walking towards the houses. If I was standing in fron of the houses, I knew i wouldnt do what I did last year and walk away.

I thought to myself "dude, last year, some of the houses that invited me back to Day 2, i easily dismissed because they were on the bottom of my list last year. Now I WANT them on my list."

"screw it" I thought as I stood in front of sorority row and I flung open my schedule to see what it looked like:

Blair
Serena
Jenny
Ryan
Seth
Marrissa

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, WHATTTTTTTT?!?!?!?!?!??!?! I mean how did I end up with ALOT of my number ones?!?!?!?!

I was so confused. I had just prepped myself to hope for the worst. now i was in utter shock.

I was a little wierded out that I was not invited to Dan. I knew Cassie and Linette were pulling for me hardcore. I thought I would be the one to rank them low. honestily though, that thought was a 5 secon thought. I was still in shock about my amazing list!

[aprocess]

Blair
Serena
Jenny
Ryan
Seth
Marrissa


Blair Waldorf- I got picked up by my good guy friends girlfriend. This kind of bothered me because 1) I knew she wasnt really involved with her house and 2) I already met her the 1st day. But the 'picking up' of the PNM's was way random (line of actives that picked up a PNM based on where they were in line). I was handed off to another active and she asked me the standard questions. I tried to veer away from these questions by asking her questions that were not 'typical' (I asked things like "have you gone to 'this mall'? I used to work at 'this place'." and she would answer, "oh thats so cool, i love their stuff. where's your hometown?") blah.

I left blair still EXTATIC about my amazing list!

Serena van der Woodsen- I was paired up with a girl who looked oddily like me. we laughed about that. This one active even came up to us and was like "tania, is that you sister who is going through recruitment you were talking about (I guess her REAL sister was going through recruitment). My name is lisa, ive heard so much about you!" Tania and I looked at each other and laughed. Then we explained to the active. She laughed with us. These girls really seemed interested in what I was saying. It was a totally different level. I left loving the girls. I loved that the active knew that tania's sister was going through recruitment. At alot of the houses, it almost seemed like when they 'switched girls' the sisters did not even know each other. but tania and the other active knew each other and looked like good friends! It was different this time. the house itself no longer looked like the 'dark' house I thought it was. Now it was just pleasent and beautiful. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"

Jenny Humphrey- Met a BEAUTIFUL girl and we talked about dance team in high school and how we both could not master this one move. They did a skit. This was cool because my floormate was in it and when everyone was pointing at people in the skit, she pointed at me a zillion times and made eye contact. As we headed to the door, I bumped into the girl who was the lead of the skit. I told her she did amazing. She thanked me and asked for my name and introduced herself (it was SUPER nopisy since we were near the door. I hope she heard me!!!)

Ryan Atwood- As I waited outside with the rest of the PNM's I kind of felt out of place here. I could feel myself thinking of how I should act. These PNM's weren't like the PNM's at Serena. They were all Regina George (mean girls) clones. Despite this, I walked in the house when I was instructed. The first active went really well. then the second active came. We were talking about all kinds of things from our favorite campus diners to the guy in the library who always sleeps in the same place at the same time everyday (true story). I left the house still stoked about my schedule. I didnt know what to make of Ryan because the actives seemed so cool, but the PNM's (and my potential pledge class) were girls that really made me feel uncomfortable. I didnt want to turn into something i was not. confused

Seth Cohen- I really did not like it here. It was very 'by the book' conversation. same questions that the girl asked the day before. Honestily, since that girl who deactivated this house kind of let out some of their ritual, it didnt seem special. i know thats harsh, but ritual is so secretive and very inticing. Without it, it just isnt the same.

Marissa Cooper- I felt wierd being in this house. I mean, I had wanted it so much last year. now it was on the very bottom of my list (?!?!) It was cool that they asked me back, but I know how loyal i am to friends. I know I cannot be in a house with many of the sisters hating one of my good friends (the girl from Marissa took the break up very hard and still had not gotten over it.) I kept repectful, but definitely did not go out of my way to ask tons of questions.


now to the ranking (4 number 1's)

1 Serena
1 Ryan
1 Jenny
1 Blair

2 Seth
3 Marissa

Today was so smooth that it scared me about tomorro (Day 3). Could things only go good for so long???

[KSUViolet06]

I am really enjoying your story. You point out some stuff that you've learned in hindsignt that all PNMs could benefit from knowing..

[aprocess]

I have been completely brutally honest in this thread about everything. I always reread my posts (and YES i know there are many spelling errors!!!!) after I post them.

I have not been completely honest about one sorority in the last post. I guess I almost feel ashamed to say why. However, I have chosen to be brutally honest, and I stand by that. The sorority that I did not COMPLETELY say the w-h-o-l-e truth on wassssss:














Marissa Cooper

Yes. I wanted to be a loyal to my friend, but that really was a cop out of telling you GCers why I really did not want to be a part of Marissa (sorry guys, won't happen again, love you!). but there is another reason why I no longer liked Marissa. This is kind of shameful to say outloud unless you know where I am comming from. Like I said in my initial post, I wanted to be amoung a diverse set of girls. Marissa had a stereotype of being pre-dominantly asian. I did not notice it at all my first year because I was blind to it (I never got the chance to hear the stereotypes). However, now that I knew it exsisted, i saw it. I would say about 85% (not true stats at all) were asian. And what makes it worse was that there was one group of caucasions (like 5-6 girls) in the sorority that you could tell were only friends with each other. It was this wierd segregation and it did not make me feel good.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by aprocess

Like I said in my initial post, I wanted to be amoung a diverse set of girls. Marissa had a stereotype of being pre-dominantly asian. I did not notice it at all my first year because I was blind to it (I never got the chance to hear the stereotypes). However, now that I knew it exsisted, i saw it. I would say about 85% (not true stats at all) were asian. And what makes it worse was that there was one group of caucasions (like 5-6 girls) in the sorority that you could tell were only friends with each other. It was this wierd segregation and it did not make me feel good.

Random question:

How do you not notice that almost every girl in a sorority is Asian? Did it just happen that you didn't talk to any Asian members during your first rush?

[aprocess]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Random question:

How do you not notice that almost every girl in a sorority is Asian? Did it just happen that you didn't talk to any Asian members during your first rush?

During my first recruitment, I was SO clueless toward the entire process. door chanting, pretty glasses of water, beautiful houses. EVERY HOUSE was like disneyland, I just walked in the door and waited 'in line.' I was not looking at race. I was primarily looking for 1) parking for my boyfriend to come visit and 2) a place to party with fun, gorgeous girls. DO NOT get me wrong, the girls of Marissa are gorgeous. Afterall, they fit the bill my freshman year.

But my priorities changed my second year. my boyfriend and I broke up and I spent my freshman year partying. If I wanted to go out, i did not need a sorority to do that. Now I just wanted to find a place to 1) make me feel part of my large campus 2) be proud of: this means that i would be proud of calling myself a _____. I felt like I missed out on a lot of what Cassie got to experience. I wanted that.

Now-my second year- that I knew the stereotypes, I found myself actually looking to see if it was true. It bothered me that the caucasions would hang out with each other and the asian girls had their own group (I saw this at parties I went to during the year). It made me feel uncomfortable.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Random question:

How do you not notice that almost every girl in a sorority is Asian? Did it just happen that you didn't talk to any Asian members during your first rush?

This made me LOL.

But I think it may be - when you're going through rush the first time - especially if the sorority isn't all wearing the same thing, you have a room full of girls and don't always know who is rushees and who is sisters.

And I know it sounds odd, but I DO know what she means about not noticing that all the girls are (tall, Asian, blonde) until you hear someone say it. From her clue she is in an area of the country where there are a lot more Asians in general so seeing them is more common and not something you really think about. It would be kind of like someone saying on your or my campus "did you notice all the RST sisters are Italian?"

[aprocess]

I woke up and went to eat. I remember kind of being lonely. Last year, I went through recruitment in a big group of floormates. Now I was just kind of doing my own thing. Of course I made some PNM friends this year who would meet up with me during the day to talk to me about their schedules and stuff (even though our group leaders 'discouraged' that), but it wasnt the same. I got ready and remember a happy shock came over me. I thought: "in 48 hours, I won't be doing this alone."

I walked out to where we met our group leaders. We were allowed a max of 4 houses. If even one of my top four were on there, then i made myself believe that today would be a great day.

I remembered thinking "I should open up my schedule in the same spot as yesterday, it made me lucky yesterday...". blah, sometimes i think i'm OCD. So I walked towards the sorority houses, paper still folded.

I got to a spot where my nerves felt the most comfortable at and opened up my schedule to see....

[aprocess]

A FULL SCHEDULE!!!!!

Serena
Ryan
Seth
Marrissa

WHY WAS SERENA AND RYAN KEEPING ME?!?! I was so stoked! a 50% chance to end up in an amazing home. That stat made me so happy! SERENA!!!! YAY!!!! I could not wait to step through that dark, cozy house and meet more girls! what sophomore gets a great full schedule??? a lot of the freshman did not even have full schedules!

Reactions to houses that I got cut from:

Blair Waldorf- not too suprised. Cool house. Would have been proud to rep their letters. But was not crying over it. Afterall, I was going through as a sophomore. It's understandable.

Jenny- WHAT???? I wasn't really sad or anything. Just a little suprised, I just thought I made a good impression and I know my floormate was routing for me. Rumor has it that this house usually only takes freshman... well thats what I choose to believe . ha.

[aprocess]

I laid out my dress for recruitment.

Makeup...... check
Purse...... check
Heels...... check
Dress...... check

Sleeping sucked. In my head I thought:

What if that political conversation really messed me up at a chance at Serena?

I loved Jessie, but does she like me or is she faking it?

What if I have bags under my eyes since I am lying awake thinking about this.

I finally fell asleep and work up before my alarm even sounded. While I got ready I thought:

Should I prepare some questions to talk about? Should I have topics to talk about?

What should I talk about?

I literally have exhaused every good topic with Serena. The girls really knew a lot about me. I decided not to think of any topics or questions. If it was meant to be, then the conversation would flow.

I headed out the door and suddenly thought "DUDE WHAT IF SERENA'S NOT EVEN ON MY PREF LIST?!?!?!"

I was scarred to death.

I walked to our meeting place with so many twists in my stomach.

The Group Leaders were being so slow. They knew that a lot of girls were going to drop because their tops might not be on the list. They told us that if they saw us open the pieces of paper they were going to give us with our schedules, that they would take it away. They made a speech that basically told us NOT to talk to each other, this was supposed to be our own personal decision, they said to go to the houses no matter what and give them an equal chance FINALLY she passed out the pieces of paper.

I walked away from the group as instructed. My hand was holding my future. I KNEW if Ryan and Serena were on there, I would HAPPILY be in either organization. I did not walk to my normal 'lucky spot'. I just took deep breaths and then stared at the folded piece of paper.

I opened it and.....






























































































.

[aprocess]

So I was going to write this tonight, but after reading your comments, I couldnt keep you in suspense that long!

I breathed in deep, I needed serena to be on there. I did not know how I had opened up my heart so much in just 4 days. Those girls were seriousily like my sisters. I thought in my head "ok, just open and go!!!"

I op




[phone call one sec]






I opened up my schedule and:

Serena
Marissa

Reactions
Ryan: you all saw it coming. I actually was cluelss at the time it happened. I wasnt stressed out about it at all though. I mean, I came to the realization that I was trying to be someone that I wasn't and just felt like I always had to look prestine. I mean, whats a sister if you cant watch gossip girl/the oc in your pajama's with them? [FAST FORWARD: you guys were right. I made a few friends at ryan post-recruitment. they told me that a few girls really fought for me, but ultimately the girl who was talking to me thought it was tacky to talk about another sorority. how was I to know? I thought I was supposed to talk to them as friends. another LEARNING EXPERIENCE/TIP: you are supposed to be their friend. Afterall, they want to be friends with their sisters, but the reality of the situation is that you have only known them for 20-30 min. They have to work hard to make you like them, that you need to output the same energy. For example, if she talked about seth negatively, I would have thought that she-- and the rest of her sorority-- was a (insert b word).]

Seth: Thank the lord oh might! free at last!

Serena: My heart jumped out of place when I saw them on the list

Marissa: It really made me fell so wierd that they were on my list. I was told that I if you only had one recruitment party that day, and you have completed all the events, then youwere garanteed a bid to the sorority on your schedule. I was hoping that Serena would be the only one (or Serena and Ryan), but now I have to suffer through another sleepless night???? lame. And how am I supposed to make myself look uninterested when I already tried?

I walked to my first party, Serena...

[ASTalumna06]

We just waited forever for that update, and now you're making us wait some more?! ahhhh!