Envelope addressing etiquette

[ZTABullwinkle]

I thought Miss was only used for women under the age of 18. But I got an RSVP back from one in her 20s with Miss written on it.

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

Also, if both are doctors, DO NOT address the envelope as Dr and Mrs. John Doe! That is my PET PEEVE!

My parents are both doctors. My mother practiced under her maiden name (she's retired), but outside the hospital she was Mrs. Dadslastname. They get mail ALL THE TIME addressed to "Dr. and Mrs. Dad Dadslastname". She seems not to be bothered by it, but it bothers me - her MD is meaningless because she's married?

Originally Posted by ZTABullwinkle

I thought Miss was only used for women under the age of 18. But I got an RSVP back from one in her 20s with Miss written on it.

Some unmarried women prefer Miss even if they're over 18. A good friend of my mother's preferred to be addressed as "Miss Jane Doe" (she never married) and used "Miss" until the day she died.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by aephi alum

My parents are both doctors. My mother practiced under her maiden name (she's retired), but outside the hospital she was Mrs. Dadslastname. They get mail ALL THE TIME addressed to "Dr. and Mrs. Dad Dadslastname". She seems not to be bothered by it, but it bothers me - her MD is meaningless because she's married?

She probably was just used to it! One of our friends actually (as a joke) addressed a letter to us as Dr. and Mr. AOII Angel! I thought that was pretty funny. I really don't care if people call me Dr. I do go by my maiden name professionally (it's really hard not to if you graduated before marrying) and my married name personally. If I get something from people who don't know me, I don't get offended, but friends and family should know better.

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by aephi alum

Some unmarried women prefer Miss even if they're over 18. A good friend of my mother's preferred to be addressed as "Miss Jane Doe" (she never married) and used "Miss" until the day she died.

That's true. All mail from my high school is still addressed to Miss Taualumna LASTNAME 1998. I think Miss is default until you change it yourself.

My high school also had an interesting/nonconformist style guide for mail addressed to alumnae who've taken their husband's name when mail is addressed to the couple - this most commonly applies for those with legacy children. Instead of Mr. and Mrs. John Doe, which ignores the fact that Mrs. Doe is an alumna, the letters would be addressed:

Mr. John Doe and Mrs. Jane SMITH Doe 1985

If Mrs. Doe hyphenates her name, then she's really Ms. Jane SMITH-Doe 1985. Of course, at that time, her name will appear first.