to rush or not to rush?

indecisivegirl · #1 08-05-2008, 12:36 AM

hi girlies.

so, i'm thinking of rushing (at an upper mid-tier uc). anyway, i was wondering if anyone has any experience here rushing at a uc? how competitive is rush? and... are flip-flops sandals (so random, i know!)? hehe.

but i also have a more pressing question. it's been nagging at me for a while, and well, i'm wondering if i should rush (or if i shouldn't).

i was quite the little "nerd" in high school. i graduated valedictorian of my high school, with tons of ap credit, rather high sat scores, and well, nerdy extracurriculars. as of this summer, i'm doing research at a fairly prestigious university. i'm also a science major, with an intent to minor in a foreign language.

moving along, when i voiced the opinion that i wanted to rush at my freshmen orientation (in a group with people with similar majors), i was immediately shot down.

a sample of the reactions i got:
"omg, why would you rush? it's a waste of money!"
"you would never get in."
"you're not sorority girl material!"

but academics aside, i am a very high-energy person. i run fairly well on 6-7 hours of sleep, and i love being busy! i have enough social skills to hold down conversations with complete strangers because i've moved quite a bit in my lifetime. i do wear glasses (should i get contacts?), but i also do wear size 3-5 jeans and dresses. i admit, i am no gorgeous model, but my face won't remind you of the boogeyman.

i want people to see past my test scores, past the academic side of me, but i'm afraid that ten seconds into the conversation, after finding out my high school activities and intended major, they'll label me as a dork/nerd/not right for a sorority and toss me to the side. and since rush basically takes up the entire welcome week at my uc (where i could be getting to know more people around my dorm), i guess i just want it to be worth my time. EDIT: i might as well add here that i have read pledged. i will also add here that i have no intention of drinking, either. i don't have a "omg you're going to hell for drinking!" attitude. it's just not for me.

so ladies, should i? shouldn't i? i had a great group of girls in high school, and we supported each other through thick and thin, tears and laughter, joys and sorrows. my best high school experiences were created with them -- i feel like a sorority would be my best bet to find something similar.

(sorry it's a bit long and jumbled up. but thank you for reading the entire post!)

sigmadork · #2 08-05-2008, 01:14 AM

hey!

okay, so this is what i told my sister this time last year. go through the recruitment process, meet the sororities and the sisters, and get to know them. see if you like what you see. but dont worry about 'being liked' or 'disliked.' be yourself. and at the end of the process (at my school, its a week) you should know more about the sororities, the girls, and if you want to keep going, or say, 'you know, its just not for me.'

the money: yeah, you pay for the right to wear the letters, not for the friendships. they just happen to be a bonus!

you are smart. all organizations - greek or not - want the smart ones! so yay for you. being smart and knowing what you want, and having goals does not, DOES NOT make you a dork: it makes you a strong person.

and as for how you look: as long as you are healthy and happy, then they should not care. if glasses make you comfy, then keep them. you should never, NEVER change yourself just to get into a sorority. thats when you leave real sisterhood behind, and walk into the stereotype, plus fake FAKE FAKE friends. you want true friends, who care for you the way you are.

drinking.... i will admit that some people choose to party with it. you can go out and have fun without the booze. it actually is funnier, because you get to see the sloshed people making fools of themselves - quite funny, i must say.

the way you have described yourself reminds me of my roommate, and fellow sister. she, too, graduated with high marks, and felt she was not the quote 'sorority' type. she went through our recruitment week, and found that at the end of the week that she wanted to join. she found sisters who accepted her, and loved her for her: we wanted her brains, funnies, and girl-next-door looks. we didnt want the stereotype.

again, i say go through the recruitment process to get more information, and for the experience.

i hope that i have helped, at least a little.

btw: what sororities are on your campus? perhaps some of the others on here could help through that info??

UCF89 · #3 08-05-2008, 01:16 AM

i plan to rush too and really dont know if i have to right to comment on this but from what ive read here academics is really important. you should be proud of your achievements, i dont think anyone will look at them negatively. Also, be more confident! i say you should rush, people tried to talk me out of it and i cant wait. you have nothing to lose and a lot to gain

good luck in what ever you decide to do.

indecisivegirl · #4 08-05-2008, 01:29 AM

@ sigma: awww, you're so sweet!

thank you so much for answering all of those questions. you definitely helped out a lot! and it's nice to finally hear a positive opinion about a social sorority.

my college actually has several, including, but not limited to, the tridelts, chi omega, pi beta phi, etc.

@ UCF89: thanks! good luck to you too!

SoCalGirl · #5 08-05-2008, 02:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by indecisivegirl

hi girlies.

so, i'm thinking of rushing (at an upper mid-tier uc).

<snip>

i was quite the little "nerd" in high school. i graduated valedictorian of my high school, with tons of ap credit, rather high sat scores, and well, nerdy extracurriculars. as of this summer, i'm doing research at a fairly prestigious university. i'm also a science major, with an intent to minor in a foreign language.

Congrats on getting into a UC. You are now an average UC freshman. Don't think for a momment there aren't hundreds of sorority women on your campus that weren't nerds in high school.

Enjoy recruitment.

indecisivegirl · #6 08-05-2008, 02:27 AM

@ SoCal: lol, then guess i don't have anything to worry about.

that makes me feel better.

SoCalGirl · #7 08-05-2008, 02:31 AM

I'm sending you a quick PM.

Kansas City · #8 08-05-2008, 09:50 AM

Why would you even ask if you should rush or not? Obviously you are interested in getting to know more people and getting something more out of your college experience. If you were truly against it like others in your orientation group appear to have been, you would not be on this board looking into Greek life. Go through rush, meet new friends and make the decision for yourself. There is no commitment by attending the recruitment parties. I would do what is right for you and not care what others think. If your friends from the past year cannot appreciate what you want to do, maybe they aren't as good of friends as you thought. It sounds like you have the personality and talents to find a group that you will be comfortable with but be sure to be VERY open minded and give EVERY group a chance to impress you. Good luck with recruitment.

AOEforme · #9 08-05-2008, 01:06 PM

Do it. You'll regret if you don't.

And, if you loved being super involved in high school, why wouldn't you want to be in a sorority? You have tons of people focusing on academics (Greek women consistently get higher GPAs than non-Greeks), philanthropy, and other activities who also happen to share that tight bond of sisterhood.

I'm sure you'll find other women there with the same "nerdy" major as you. When I went through formal rush, I almost wrote off ABC sorority because they had the reputation of being just pretty girls. The girl who rushed me had a Medical Microbiology and Immunology major, too. (She actually got me my first lab job.)

So, do it! I hope you love every minute of it.... I'm sure you will!

P.S. If you go through the entire formal rush with an open mind and you still don't feel you fit anywhere, check out the social and professional sororities (I'm slightly biased here

). You'll for sure have girls with the same majors and classes then. They also (as professional, too) focus more on careers in whatever field it is you're majoring in.

barbino · #10 08-05-2008, 01:10 PM

Great last post.
Ditto, Ditto, Ditto.
Just be yourself and see what happens. Many people have gone through recruitment "just to see." You never know unless you try.

exlurker · #11 08-05-2008, 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

Congrats on getting into a UC. You are now an average UC freshman. Don't think for a momment there aren't hundreds of sorority women on your campus that weren't nerds in high school.

Enjoy recruitment.

Ditto.
You're not in high school any more; from your description, you're probably in one of the slew of UCs that are "always" on the annual U.S. News & World Report list of the top 50 "national universities" (I think that's their term).
Probably a diffferent world in many ways. Enjoy.

DGTess · #12 08-05-2008, 05:48 PM

Those who say you're not "sorority girl material" are not sorority women. Nor do they know you. Why should they have any say in what you do with your life?

What's the worst that can happen? Either you, or the sororities, or both, decide it's not a right fit for you. Meantime you've met a lot of new people. Where's the down side?

trideltrockstar · #13 08-05-2008, 08:56 PM

Definitely rush! The experience will be worthwhile even if you decide not to pledge a sorority. I am not too familiar with the UC system but I am sure they have a wide variety of sororities and that there are many different personalities amongst the chapters.

Best of luck!!!

indecisivegirl · #14 08-05-2008, 09:32 PM

@ Kansas: Thanks!
But eh, I wouldn't say that they're "not as good of friends" as I thought. I think it's more that they're looking out for me -- they don't want to set me up for something that I have no shot at (somewhere along those lines).

@ AOE: Just curious, but can you join both a professional and social sorority...? Haha.

I'd probably end up with one or the other, but not both... I would like to be able to dedicate quality time to whatever I'm involved in. Thanks for the heads-up about the prof. sororities, though!

@ barbino: I know, I know. I should.

I will. I'll turn in my registration form sometime this week...

@ exlurker: Yeah, I'm headed towards one of those UCs.

@ DGT: You're right. I suppose I'm worried about making a fool out of myself...? But also, rush is during my UC's welcome week. Like, the ENTIRE week... so I don't want to spend all that time for something that, as I previously believed, had little-to-no shot at.

@Tridelt: Thanks!

AOII Angel · #15 08-05-2008, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by indecisivegirl

@ DGT: You're right. I suppose I'm worried about making a fool out of myself...? But also, rush is during my UC's welcome week. Like, the ENTIRE week... so I don't want to spend all that time for something that, as I previously believed, had little-to-no shot at.

It would be hard for anyone to tell you that you have it all wrapped up, but so far, it sounds like you have a good shot at being invited to join a sorority. Keep an open mind and maximize your options. People who have NO shot at being invited include people who have very poor grades (Not you!), people who don't have social skills (Not you!) and people who drink too much and make fools of themselves prior to rush (Not you!) Have a great time at recruitment. You'll be glad you took the time out of welcome week to try!