Need help organizing my sorority

[GammaDelt]

Originally Posted by AlwaysSAI

As a memeber of one of those "clubs" you're speaking of--let me give you a little info.

-Sigma Alpha Iota is a single sexed women organization. We were granted exemption to Title IX when our membership criteria was broadened to one music class. We pay dues, had to pay an initiation & pledging fee. Oh, and our nationals is hosting something like 20 leadership conferences this summer for sisters around the country (one of which I am attending!)
-We have a pledging ceremony and a six week pledge (MiT) process. At the end of that process there's this little ceremony called INITIATION where the MiTs learn the secret meanings of all of our symbols, the secret meaning behind the greek letters SAI, and many other things which I do not speak of in public out of respect for my ritual.
-We have more than 100 years of history and some 210 active chapters.

And, you also speak of Mu Phi Epsilon and Phi Mu Alpha. We also have those chapters on my campus. They also have a pledging and initiation ritual along with a 6-10 week pledge process.

On many campuses we are not recognized by the social greek system because of our focus on music but that does not take away from our rich histories, rituals, and all the work the members do to keep our chapters running. And, my chapter is currently in search of someone to fill two vacancies we've had recently on our advisory committee.

How about you go do some more research, k.

I'm not saying anything about your particular chapter. Everyone's greek experience is different. I have friends in the music fraternities that I'm talking about, and they do not have the same type of tradition and ritual that my sorority does. In addition, in order to be recognized by the campus, we have to have school advisers (which we do not want because there is such a tight reign over them), go dry and state a special interest in our constitution, like music, or biology; however, we want to be open to any student who wants to join, so long as they are interested in service. So please refrain from attacking me when I am not attacking you or your fraternity; clearly, your fraternity is essentially different from the fraternity that I'm talking about in this post. k?

[OPhiAGinger]

Originally Posted by GammaDelt

In addition, in order to be recognized by the campus, we have to have school advisers (which we do not want because there is such a tight reign over them), go dry and state a special interest in our constitution, like music, or biology; however, we want to be open to any student who wants to join, so long as they are interested in service.

Of the three requirements for being recognized by your campus, one of them is not really an issue. You already require a special interest in your members -- a commitment to service. Just put that in your constitution, and you can check that requirement off.

The school requires you to have an advisor because they need to protect themselves from liability. But as long as you have the ability to select your advisor, you should be able to find one that will provide guidance and oversight without stifling your individualism. Will they intervene if you try to do something that will put the sorority and university at risk? Absolutely! That's what they're supposed to do. Don't do risky things and you should be alright. You'll probably even benefit from the impartial advice of a non-member in sorting out sorority issues.

About going dry.... Apparently that's non-negotiable at your school. But I'm concerned that you are so adament in resisting this change. Would your sisterhood crumble without alcohol to lubricate it? If so, you've got serious problems. Omega Phi Alpha went dry nationally about 15 years ago. Although the national leaders were concerned about the policy's acceptance among the active sisters, it turned out to be less of an issue than they had anticipated.

[GammaDelt]

Originally Posted by OPhiAGinger

The school requires you to have an advisor because they need to protect themselves from liability. But as long as you have the ability to select your advisor, you should be able to find one that will provide guidance and oversight without stifling your individualism.

I guess I misworded our feelings about having an adviser. We're not against having an adviser at all - it would be great to have an adviser. However, we don't get to pick our adviser. The school will assign us one who they think will be good for the job, and we're afraid that our adviser will be too uptight and controlling, as many of the school assigned advisers are.

Originally Posted by OPhiAGinger

About going dry.... Apparently that's non-negotiable at your school. But I'm concerned that you are so adament in resisting this change. Would your sisterhood crumble without alcohol to lubricate it? If so, you've got serious problems. Omega Phi Alpha went dry nationally about 15 years ago. Although the national leaders were concerned about the policy's acceptance among the active sisters, it turned out to be less of an issue than they had anticipated.

Our sisterhood is keen on drinking, I'm not going to lie. I think the general consensus is that it would be a great idea in theory to go dry. It would attract a lot of people who are solely interested in service, which would be awesome. But my sisters do like to drink. and since we're all best friends, who better to drink and have a good time with then your best friends? it would be easy to have an alcohol free rush, and we already have alcohol free pledging, but once those girls who are completely opposed to drinking are active members, then what? No one can stop people from drinking socially, because sometimes its hard to draw a definitive line between sorority time and friends time. I'm just afraid the line will get blurred if we declare ourselves a dry sorority, and then the new actives will feel who pledged a dry sorority will feel uncomfortable when there is social drinking among sorority sisters at what may or may not be a sorority event. does that make sense?

[KSUViolet06]

I think you misunderstand what "dry" means. Dry doesn't mean no drinking EVER EVER. It just means that alcohol can only be served at certain social events (i.e. formal/mixers/date parties) and only to those who are 21 and over.

Basically if it wasn't a date party, formal, or mixer, it was clear that there was to be BE no alcohol.

You say that there are no boundaries between sister and friend time, well then you all need to be mature and MAKE SOME. Yes your sisters are your friends. I get that. My sisters are mine too. But we knew that while it was okay for us to go out to bars and drink together (friend time), it wasn't cool for uas to drink at sorority things where we weren't supposed to have alcohol (sister time).

[OPhiAGinger]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I think you misunderstand what "dry" means. Dry doesn't mean no drinking EVER EVER. It just means that alcohol can only be served at certain social events (i.e. formal/mixers/date parties) and only to those who are 21 and over.

Interesting interpretation. In O Phi A, "dry" means there can be no alcohol at any sorority event -- ever. Not at mixers, not at formal, and not even to those who are over 21.

I suspect that her school's requirement is similar to O Phi A's interpretation..

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by OPhiAGinger

In O Phi A, "dry" means there can be no alcohol at any sorority event -- ever. Not at mixers, not at formal, and not even to :

I'm sorry, my post was based on Tri Sigma's national policies about alcohol. We are only allowed to have alcohol at social events that have been approved by our advisors and HQ. In addition, the alcohol must be provided by the venue (3rd party vendor). Transportation to and from the event must be provided (i.e. charter buses). The event doesn't get approved if those 2 criteria aren't met. In addition, alcohol is only to be served to those who are 21+ with proper ID. Anyone who is drunk upon arrival at the event doesn't get in.

Other NPCs have similar guidelines concerning alcohol. I understand that other sororities like yours have different rules. I was just showing her that there ARE sororities who are allowed to have alcohol under some strict guidelines.

[DSTRen13]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I think you misunderstand what "dry" means. Dry doesn't mean no drinking EVER EVER. It just means that alcohol can only be served at certain social events (i.e. formal/mixers/date parties) and only to those who are 21 and over.

Dry can mean different things to different orgs (different insurance policies, different campus definitions, etc.). This seems like a pretty liberal-leaning definition to me.

But under any definition I've ever heard, for any unofficial (read: does not have the sorority's name attached to it) gathering of sisters, drinking is no big deal. And as with most groups, some people will drink more, some less, and some not at all. Part of being a sisterhood is learning to accept those differences and get along together.

I may be the only one who thinks this way, but it just has to be said.

You come on here pleading for help, and people are giving you suggestions that just might actually help you increase your membership. These people share these things because they've experienced that it works in their own organizations.

Yet despite all these suggestions you seem like you're very resistant to change.

The school will assign us one who they think will be good for the job, and we're afraid that our adviser will be too uptight and controlling, as many of the school assigned advisers are.

You're already worried about tomorrow when today hasn't even happened yet.

Don't even try to sell me on "and since we're all best friends, who better to drink and have a good time with then your best friends?". No need to justify. If drinking is that important to you, then I'm sorry. Y'all have bigger issues to worry about.

All that said, people here are trying to help. They're telling you what's worked for them. If you have no intention on being willing to listen without getting so defensive and implying that you want to keep things just the way it is, then quit wasting your time and ours.

[OPhiAGinger]

Originally Posted by GammaDelt

Our sisterhood is keen on drinking, I'm not going to lie.

I love your candor.

Originally Posted by GammaDelt

...once those girls who are completely opposed to drinking are active members, then what?

I'm not quite following your logic here. Just because you reposition your org as a dry sorority, you assume your non-drinking members will pass judgement on your sisters who drink in a social situation? I think that's a flawed assumption. Drinkers and non-drinkers get along just fine in the post-collegiate world. Just explain to pnms that your no-alcohol policies are based on risk management decisions rather than a moral or religious opposition to alcohol. Then they shouldn't have any awkwardness if they run into a sister who is legally drinking at a non-sorority function down the road.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by GammaDelt

state a special interest in our constitution, like music, or biology; however, we want to be open to any student who wants to join, so long as they are interested in service.

IMO this is the most problematic thing and I think that GammaDelt's group is probably RIGHT to stay independent of the school - nothing to do with the going dry, the advisors, etc etc etc.

They can't just be "Gamma Delta Pi, a social and service sorority helping the community and its members." They would have to be "Gamma Delta Pi, a sorority for students in the music education field" or "a sorority to promote the study and appreciation of organic chemistry" or something of the like. And from what she's said it sounds like the school would keep tabs - "you're the chemistry sorority, why do you have all these English majors in your group?"

They want to be a general social/service sorority, uniting people from ALL disciplines, and aren't allowed to be, with the dictates the school has set down.

It seems like the school is promoting Greek groups only as something for your resume - i.e. I was in the music sorority, I was in the biology sorority etc. With that mindset coming from the top down, it's no wonder people don't see the point of joining a sorority solely for friendship and service.

[MysticCat]

^^^^ Pardon the crash -- I know this is about sorority recruitment -- but just to try to think this through a little.

GammaDelt says that they are required to have a "special interest." Seems to me this isn't necessarily as restrictive as being limited to certain majors. I'm a member of the all-male fraternity with a chapter on her campus. (I won't go into the "club" discussion, but I will say that our Delta chapter at her school was founded in 1901 and is our oldest continually active chapter. I'm guessing, then, that they have a keen sense of our traditions as well as our probationary member and initiation requirements.)

We really do only require an interest; there's no requirement that one be a music major. (At least there's not one nationally; I suppose there could be a chapter practice of only initiating music majors or minors.) I've known of chapters with no music majors. So it seems like it might at least be worth exploring whether service would be a sufficient interest, especially if not being recognized hinders their recruitment.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

We really do only require an interest; there's no requirement that one be a music major. (At least there's not one nationally; I suppose there could be a chapter practice of only initiating music majors or minors.) I've known of chapters with no music majors. So it seems like it might at least be worth exploring whether service would be a sufficient interest, especially if not being recognized hinders their recruitment.

But the point is they shouldn't have to lie and say their interest is this or that when it's not, just to be recognized. They are a general social/service sorority.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by 33girl

But the point is they shouldn't have to lie and say their interest is this or that when it's not, just to be recognized. They are a general social/service sorority.

No argument that they shouldn't have to lie. I took her earlier email to say that they do have an interest in service and expect new members to have an interest in service. I just figured that it's worth asking whether that is sufficient for recognition rather than assuming it isn't.

[princesskneesa]

Gamma Delta,
Have you considered looking at some concrete ways to volunteer? In addition to coordinating service opps at least a semester in advance, as KSU said, you should also see who needs what. Maybe you all could adopt an elementary school in need. Or, start up an after-school tutoring program. Pick one or two ways to focus your service and stick with 'em. And no, you don't have to volunteer in schools.

Also, do Gamma Delta Pis wear their letters a lot? Maybe make themselves seen a bit more. Or even your official colors. Something to show your sorority's pride. Maybe take out an ad in the school paper- Gamma Delta Pi wishes everyone good luck on their finals.