Gays in fraternites (pt. 2)

[bowsandtoes]

We don't have gays in our fraternity. It's not because we hate gays. They're just different than us. When rushing we seek out young men who have similar interests, goals, and morals as we do; homosexuality doesn't fall in that scope.

I know plenty of gay people, they're nice to me and I am nice to them in return. That said, I'm not friends with any of them, mostly for the same reasons I wouldn't rush any of them.

[breathesgelatin]

Originally Posted by bowsandtoes

We don't have gays in our fraternity. It's not because we hate gays. They're just different than us. When rushing we seek out young men who have similar interests, goals, and morals as we do; homosexuality doesn't fall in that scope.

That's what a lot of men in elite southern fraternities think. Emphasis on think. You may be surprised what you find out after graduation.

Speaking from experience here.

[jlenoconel]

Well, its kind of ridiculous! You won't find me kissing anyone's feet to get into a fraternity. I object to heterosexuality, its immoral and not in the scope of what I find acceptable in my little cliques! Oh please, someone's sexuality is their business. Just because someone is gay doesn't mean they don't have the same interests as you do. Stuck up, egotistical idiots!

[jlenoconel]

People need to wake up. I will NEVER join a fraternity! The word sounds gay in its self anyway, a bunch of dudes doing a whole lot of male bonding... hmmmmm!

[icelandelf]

Originally Posted by jlenoconel

People need to wake up. I will NEVER join a fraternity! The word sounds gay in its self anyway, a bunch of dudes doing a whole lot of male bonding... hmmmmm!

Then James, why, may I ask, are you posting here? We have people on this site that are heterosexual, homosexual, etc. Some are outspoken and some are not. But their common focus is that they are members or potential members of a variety of Greek organizations. If you have no intention of being considered for a fraternity, then why are you here?

[rufio]

one of my brothers is openly gay. its not a big deal. the only real problem is that nobody likes his movie selections on porn n' chicken night.

look, if a fraternity doesn't accept you because of who you are, then why would you want to make them your brothers.

also, why come on a greek message board asking to hear people's opinions, then go around insulting not only the people, but the entire greek system, when you hear answers you don't like.

[SAEalumnus]

Originally Posted by jlenoconel

Well, its kind of ridiculous! You won't find me kissing anyone's feet to get into a fraternity. I object to heterosexuality, its immoral and not in the scope of what I find acceptable in my little cliques! Oh please, someone's sexuality is their business. Just because someone is gay doesn't mean they don't have the same interests as you do. Stuck up, egotistical idiots!

Interests that include joining fraternities...? And let's try to keep the name calling to a minimum, thanks.

Originally Posted by jlenoconel

People need to wake up. I will NEVER join a fraternity! The word sounds gay in its self anyway, a bunch of dudes doing a whole lot of male bonding... hmmmmm!

...evidently not. Your comments lack any real argumentative logic and sound instead more like sour grapes. If the word 'fraternity' sounds gay, then why would a gay man describe it with that kind of negative connotation? You'd think you'd want to join in that case. The word 'fraternity' shares the same etymology as 'brother' and 'kinsman' and is suggestive of a family, which is in a sense one of the functions our organizations serve.

Originally Posted by icelandelf

Then James, why, may I ask, are you posting here? We have people on this site that are heterosexual, homosexual, etc. Some are outspoken and some are not. But their common focus is that they are members or potential members of a variety of Greek organizations. If you have no intention of being considered for a fraternity, then why are you here?

Originally Posted by rufio

one of my brothers is openly gay. its not a big deal. the only real problem is that nobody likes his movie selections on porn n' chicken night.

look, if a fraternity doesn't accept you because of who you are, then why would you want to make them your brothers.

also, why come on a greek message bored asking to hear people's opinions, then go around insulting not only the people, but the entire greek system, when you hear answers you don't like.

You may find you get a better response from people by understanding their perspective and making an effort to have a rational discussion. This is a skill that fraternity and sorority members learn early.

[starang21]

Originally Posted by rufio

the only real problem is that nobody likes his movie selections on porn n' chicken night.

LOL!

[moe.ron]

Originally Posted by jlenoconel

Well, its kind of ridiculous! You won't find me kissing anyone's feet to get into a fraternity. I object to heterosexuality, its immoral and not in the scope of what I find acceptable in my little cliques! Oh please, someone's sexuality is their business. Just because someone is gay doesn't mean they don't have the same interests as you do. Stuck up, egotistical idiots!

Do you need a hug?

[macallan25]

Originally Posted by jlenoconel

Well, its kind of ridiculous! You won't find me kissing anyone's feet to get into a fraternity. I object to heterosexuality, its immoral and not in the scope of what I find acceptable in my little cliques! Oh please, someone's sexuality is their business. Just because someone is gay doesn't mean they don't have the same interests as you do. Stuck up, egotistical idiots!

Listen. You came in and started the thread jackass.

Nobody is acting like an egotistical idiot. My response to you was perfectly rational as was Elephant Walks. Don't ask a question like that out in the open and then bitch about people's responses.

[couggirl]

Originally Posted by breathesgelatin

That's what a lot of men in elite southern fraternities think. Emphasis on think. You may be surprised what you find out after graduation.

Speaking from experience here.

I am not sure why the OP was thinking me because I told me story in response to this post.

I was trying to make the point that you can think some one is something (in this case straigt) and be totally wrong. And if you treat people differntly because they are, in this case gay, you are being a totaly jerk because you might not know who is gay and who isn't and by treating people one way because you know they are, in this case, gay then you are a hypocrite and should not go around saying how you are not going to be friends with some one who is gay, because you might not even know.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by bowsandtoes

We don't have gays in our fraternity.

haha

None of our organizations' screening processes reach that far.

[Buttonz]

I have a friend who is gay who was afraid to rush. He thought he wouldn't wind up with any bids, because it's clear that he is gay. After the first night, he had two favorites (from 3 fraternities on campus at that time). He received bids to both.

In the one that he joined, there are a few gay men. Nothing wrong with it.

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by bowsandtoes

We don't have gays in our fraternity. It's not because we hate gays. They're just different than us. When rushing we seek out young men who have similar interests, goals, and morals as we do; homosexuality doesn't fall in that scope.

I know plenty of gay people, they're nice to me and I am nice to them in return. That said, I'm not friends with any of them, mostly for the same reasons I wouldn't rush any of them.

You can do a search. I think I said basically the same thing on here a few years ago. I figured my chapter would never have gays in it for basically the same reasons you espoused here.

I was wrong.

In fact, one of my fellow founders recently came out. It's hard to see it from where you are right now, but give it 10 years. The chances of your having homosexuals in your chapter [closeted] are better than you think. One of our actives even came out recently. I can't say I have a problem with it. He and the above-mentioned alumnus are real credits to my chapter. I'm proud to call them brothers.

[PANTHERTEKE]

I really don't see a problem with having gay guys in a chapter as long as they fit in. Emphasis on that last part.

Would we extend a bid to a flamboyant homosexual with pink hair and a rainbow t-shirt? No, because he wouldn't fit in with our chapter.

However, if a young man has things in common with our chapter, has something to offer to the Fraternity, and doesn't let his homosexuality define who he is as a person, then I don't see why anyone would deny him a bid.

We have an openly gay brother in my chapter. Granted, he isn't flamboyant and doesn't let his homosexuality define who he is-- many people are surprised when they find out he's gay. And although he might get teased about it sometimes (but honestly, everyone in my chapter gets teased about SOMETHING), at the end of the day we love him just as much as we love any other brother.

In fact, he was diagnosed with cancer recently. He went out of the country to get treated and came back tonight for a brotherhood event, and when everyone saw him we all went up to him, hugged him, and told him how we had missed him. He's an awesome brother and has given a lot to our fraternity.

Sorry to have gotten sidetracked, but what I'm basically saying is the following: if a guy fits in with the chapter, gets along well with the actives, has something to offer, and wants to be a part of the Fraternity (whether he's straight or gay) then it shouldn't be a problem.