Sorors, SFs, One & All

[tld221]

I have some questions for ALL BGLO sorority members. Did YOU join your sorority through a collegiate or alumnae chapter?Collegiate chapter

For those who joined via the ALUMNAE chapter,
A. Did you apply for membership during your college years? Yes, during my junior year. but i did not become a member until my senior year.

B. While waiting for the chance to join, what did you do in the meantime? well, BEFORE i even felt like i had the chance to join, i went through a BGLO-mania of sorts. I didnt know black sororities existed (none were on my campus and the visibility was less apparent locally) until i started to research it. The more i researched, the more fanatic i became about greek life. i just could not WAIT to be greek... it was just a matter of which org i desired to be granted membership. that is what took my time to become an esteemed member of Sigma Gamma Rho 2 years later. i dont regret it NOW because i needed that time to figure it out for myself, but back then i was like, "why can't i figure out which org is best for me? i want to be greek now!" like everyone has been saying, things happen when they are SUPPOSED to happen.

C. While others around you were becoming members, how did you stay focused on the mission of joining the sisterhood that you felt lead to pursue?
most of the people who were becoming members around me were of other orgs. and it just made me want it more. though only a handful of black greeks were at my school, they were always together and were on their game with everything they did. even now, when i hear about people who crossed at my college (and in increasing numbers) im like, "ok, i can see that... but damn, who knew THAT many people were interested?" and they are RUNNING things at school now.

i kept felt like every semester, what was i doing wrong? my grades were on point, i was active on my campus and community. i guess looking back, i wasnt as forthcoming about my interest, and if the org doesnt even know you're interested, how can they let you know what events are coming up and even keep you in mind?

i stayed focused by pursuing other interests--i wanted to be an RA, so i did that (and its crazy cause almost every BGLO sorority member i know was an RA). i was working with a mentoring organization, and became a director of that org. i started working on my senior thesis. but i worked on being visible as an interest, but not to the point of being "OMG I LOVE XYZ PLEASE PICK ME!" but making sure i knew the who, what, where and when of each event, whether it was greek or not - if i knew a member of said org would be there, i was there! again, the visibility was limited, so even finding out that XYZ or ABC was doing an event was a challenge in itself.

in the end, what kept me focused was the desire that would not desist and also i was almost done with undergrad. i knew that if i didnt do it before i graduated, i wouldve been less inclined to pursue it as an alumna.

[EnlightenedEve]

I am new to GC. I only joined this week as a part of a networking project on my list of goals. I have recently been struggling with determining the purpose of my life and am seeking to meet people who have struggled to find what it is that they feel called to do, but now would not be able to live without doing. I think it is inspirational that all of you who posted are strong enough to admit that sometimes you have to work on improving yourself and wait to achieve your goals. Thank You for posting how you have all stayed determined and focus on your goals. You have all helped me immensely by reminding me that no matter what the goal is, sometimes I must step back and take a second look at what I am doing and how I intend to achieve it.

As a female mechanical engineering major struggling to stay focused, get a decent GPA in a major where 80 + percent of students do not gradate on time from this department in the university, and decide what to do after graduation, you have all become anonymous mentors. If you have any information that you think would help me in my continuing advancement, please feel free to contact me.

And remember that your struggle and your storm will help you grow stronger. But by sharing our stories with others, we can help the world grow stronger.

Thank You Again
Sisterfriend Surviving the Struggle

[TRYIN HARD]

Originally Posted by treblk

Interesting post! I can understand being discourged, I can understand being hurt..what I can't understand is coming to public forum and airing out those feelings to members and non-members of the organization you love and support, like that is suppose to make us say, "aww we sorry, our bad". No one said that life was easy, especially, as you stated, knowing that you move a lot and have not gotten to build the foundation and bonds with a local chapter. Maybe you are focusing on the wrong things *shrug*, maybe you need to relax and wait another 9 years if that is what it takes. Maybe you need to focus on your professional degree and get that squared away, maybe you need to give it up and let it ride. If it's meant to be, then it will be. Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. is not going anywhere, but if you decide to give up..then so be it. Please know we will be alright!

I read most of the posts in this thread and as a non-Delta/"wannabe" or whatever, I must say your comments were very insensitive. At one time in your life you were a non-Delta/"wannabe"/prospective or whatever, how would you have felt if you never made a line. I must also say that I attended a large HBCU in the south where competition was fierce to pledge. I did not actively pursue my interests because I was struggling financially, constantly switching my major, and almost transferred schools. Nevertheless, when the Deltas at my school finally crossed after being on probation for several years, I was astonished. I knew many girls on the line that smoked weed, constantly cheated in class, and DID NOT DO PUBLIC SERVICE! In fact many of them told me personally how they'd lied and gotten fake letters written indicating that they had done community service. Furthermore, so many of them are inactive now it is ridiculous. I guess I'm writing this to say, what happened to putting yourself in the shoes of others. I understand the greek "I've got what you want, so I'm better" attitude, but my goodness! I have never attended a rush, but would like to someday. I have had no luck in finding out about the activities for prospectives in my area, but hopefully one day I will, but if I encounter some of the negative personalities on this forum it is an organization I'd choose not to pursue.

[TRYIN HARD]

Also, I must add everyone knows for a fact that some girls have all the credentials and are not chosen simply because someone doesn't like them. At an HBCU girls were so petty. Some girls didn't get chosen because they dated an Alpha, or the ex-boyfriend of a Delta, because they were overweight, etc. I also knew a girl that was on line to be a Delta, while running to be the university queen. After she lost the competition the Deltas dropped her from her line, as if to say we don't want a loser on our line. All of you can deny it, but a lot of pettiness goes along with this process, and I hate to say it, but it's because women are known for being catty and hatin' on one another. Don't get me wrong, I think your organization is filled with greatness, but the pledging process for all GLO is often filled with a lot of BS.

[ladygreek]

^^^ First of all you responded to a post that is a year old. Second, you have made some bad assumptions. Third, and yes I am insensitive, someone with an attitude like yours needs not to join any BGLO. And last, maybe you should transfer to a PWI.

[TRYIN HARD]

Originally Posted by ladygreek

^^^ First of all you responded to a post that is a year old. Second, you have made some bad assumptions. Third, and yes I am insensitive, someone with an attitude like yours needs not to join any BGLO. And last, maybe you should transfer to a PWI.

So, and I don't care if it is a year old. I haven't made any bad assumptions, I have seen these things happen to people that's all. But, I'm the one with the attitude.

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD

So, and I don't care if it is a year old. I haven't made any bad assumptions, I have seen these things happen to people that's all. But, I'm the one with the attitude.

Have some respect please. You can't insult members of an organization and expect them not to respond. Whatever you observed at your school is only hearsay to the members here and you can't say anything about a membership intake process being petty or BS since you haven't gone thru such a process yourself.

Also, many of the members on this board are not undergrads. Many are alumnae members, some of which who have been active in their organizations for 15, 20, 30 years and you could learn a whole lot from them. Our members are different people with different opinions so just because someone says something that you don't like, it doesn't mean you should attack the entire organization. I take it that you joined greekchat to interact with members of the organization that you one day hope to be a part of. Don't mess that up.

[pinkies up]

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD

Also, I must add everyone knows for a fact that some girls have all the credentials and are not chosen simply because someone doesn't like them. At an HBCU girls were so petty. Some girls didn't get chosen because they dated an Alpha, or the ex-boyfriend of a Delta, because they were overweight, etc. I also knew a girl that was on line to be a Delta, while running to be the university queen. After she lost the competition the Deltas dropped her from her line, as if to say we don't want a loser on our line. All of you can deny it, but a lot of pettiness goes along with this process, and I hate to say it, but it's because women are known for being catty and hatin' on one another. Don't get me wrong, I think your organization is filled with greatness, but the pledging process for all GLO is often filled with a lot of BS.

As my sistergreeks have already stated, you aren't helping your case AT ALL. You have a bad taste in your mouth because you can't deal with rejection. It's a part of life and while I didn't receive a rejection letter, there have been times when I was rejected. Did I come to post my disgust of the GAP, or it's affiliates? The first undergraduate university I applied to? The first job I interviewed for? NO. Rejection means look and see what you need to improve upon and if it's for you or in your heart, try again.

[ladygreek]

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD

So, and I don't care if it is a year old. I haven't made any bad assumptions, I have seen these things happen to people that's all. But, I'm the one with the attitude.

Based on what you posted you have made some bad assumptions. Unless you were behind the closed doors of the chapter, you are missing vital background information. And there are always two, sometimes three sides to a story.

Oh and very honestly, I am being nice.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by CrimsonTide4

Hello Everyone,
It is that time of the year again. Some prospectives are getting acceptance letters and others are being rejected.

I have some questions for ALL BGLO sorority members. Did YOU join your sorority through a collegiate or alumnae chapter?

Undergraduate chapter at Spelman College in 1989.

Originally Posted by CrimsonTide4

To ALL BGLO Sorority members, what advice would you give those who were not chosen this year for membership?

Take it from someone who really knows... Your slate must be cleaned and cleared from all blemishes on anyone's record and what anyone says--loose lips sinks ships... Be careful of the company you keep you never know who might be watching...

And it is like a career without retirement, if you want it, you best be out there, visibly enthralled with the magnitude of the organization. That takes research, searching for answers, and knowing conflict resolution, organizational management and parliamentary/operational procedures.

A one time dose of membership intake activities will NEVER prepare you for a lifetime of membership!!! But going to chapter meetings, conferences both regional/national, etc. will... And paying all your required assessments.

When called, will you be there?

If you are looking to have a bunch a friends to kick it with that has this one kind of thing in common, wow, dude, you need to have more of a life...

[onetruediva1913]

I joined Delta as a undergrad and would not trade my experience for the WORLD!

As far as the rejection letters I encourage people to try again and just make sure that you are on point. Sometimes you may have to look at your attitude to see why you did not get in. As a past chapter president I have had to put my john hancock on many rejection letters so I know how the whole process goes of having to send the dreaded letter. But please do not be discouraged as i stated before just try again. If DST is in your heart nothing or no one can stop you from getting to your goal.

[treblk]

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD

I read most of the posts in this thread and as a non-Delta/"wannabe" or whatever, I must say your comments were very insensitive. At one time in your life you were a non-Delta/"wannabe"/prospective or whatever, how would you have felt if you never made a line. I must also say that I attended a large HBCU in the south where competition was fierce to pledge. I did not actively pursue my interests because I was struggling financially, constantly switching my major, and almost transferred schools. Nevertheless, when the Deltas at my school finally crossed after being on probation for several years, I was astonished. I knew many girls on the line that smoked weed, constantly cheated in class, and DID NOT DO PUBLIC SERVICE! In fact many of them told me personally how they'd lied and gotten fake letters written indicating that they had done community service. Furthermore, so many of them are inactive now it is ridiculous. I guess I'm writing this to say, what happened to putting yourself in the shoes of others. I understand the greek "I've got what you want, so I'm better" attitude, but my goodness! I have never attended a rush, but would like to someday. I have had no luck in finding out about the activities for prospectives in my area, but hopefully one day I will, but if I encounter some of the negative personalities on this forum it is an organization I'd choose not to pursue.

I'm just now seeing this and since my Soror and Sistergreeks have all chimed in..all I can type to you is...
we all have our opinions...

[onetruediva1913]

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD

Also, I must add everyone knows for a fact that some girls have all the credentials and are not chosen simply because someone doesn't like them. At an HBCU girls were so petty. Some girls didn't get chosen because they dated an Alpha, or the ex-boyfriend of a Delta, because they were overweight, etc. I also knew a girl that was on line to be a Delta, while running to be the university queen. After she lost the competition the Deltas dropped her from her line, as if to say we don't want a loser on our line. All of you can deny it, but a lot of pettiness goes along with this process, and I hate to say it, but it's because women are known for being catty and hatin' on one another. Don't get me wrong, I think your organization is filled with greatness, but the pledging process for all GLO is often filled with a lot of BS.

So I really want to respond sensibly however I think right now you are very BITTER with rejection so you probably would be on the defense about anything I say so with that being said I will try to respond to the best of my ability. If you were not chosen for the line at your school for whatever reason it is something you have to deal with.Either you try again or you sit back and hate on those who made it. However commenting on a PLEDGE PROCESS you clearly know NOTHING about is not the way to get my sorors or anyone else to offer advice that may help you in your quest to greekdom.

[neosoul]

I'm a day late and a dollar short but here are my responses:

Did YOU join your sorority through a collegiate or alumnae chapter?

Graduate (Alumnae) Chapter


For those who joined via the ALUMNAE chapter,
A. Did you apply for membership during your college years?

no, the school I went to had a chapter that was extinct (all the members had graduated)

B. While waiting for the chance to join, what did you do in the meantime?

got my Bachelors, moved to DC, moved back to VA, went back to grad school, and developed emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

C. While others around you were becoming members, how did you stay focused on the mission of joining the sisterhood that you felt lead to pursue?

I knew my time was coming, even though I was rejected and had to wait for a year before I could become a member, I JUST knew it was coming, and I'd like to think life before Zeat prepared me for life WITH Zeta. Now I can take sisterly or unsisterly correction without thinking folks are hating, I can appreciate the work that Zeta does for her community, and the business aspect of sorority life.

Zeta enriches my life but it doesn't consume it, and I can honestly say that if I never had an opportunity to be a Zeta, I would still live a fulfilling life... just a little less satisfying and a little less dull with no royal blue and white to brighten up my days

[true_story]

For my SFs who are waiting/hoping to become a member what are you doing to keep your interests and to increase your attractiveness?


Hello to all. I am new on GC and just wanted to respond to some of the discussions. So... for the past three years I have just been gathering my information and being patient. I have had an educational journey on BGLOs and the history of African Americans, both men and women. Unfortunately, my mother did not attend college therefore, as a freshman, I did not know ANYTHING about sororities. Nonetheless, the organizations attracted my attention. In terms of what I am doing to keep my interest- I feel that if your heart is really into becoming an influential member of an organization, then your interest will always be there. Despite rejection and obstacles, a true passion for something (in this case, sorority) will prevail no matter what. Also, in terms of what I am doing to increase my attractiveness- just being myself. I myself, would not be attracted to an organization unless it resembled some part of me. I have always loved working with people and helping people so being apart of service organizations on campus and actively participating in community service is only natural. Furthermore, I stay optimistic and carry myself in a positive manner, although I can have my days, I do not let it affect others. Thank you to anyone who read my post (although a little long) and hope to see you around the forums!