Quote:
Originally Posted by Fawn Liebowitz
hmmm...would it be too bitchy to say "choice of groom"?
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Well, that would be the first mistake for me, too.
It was late April, and it had snowed every day before the wedding, and miraculously, all the snow had melted and the day was absolutely gorgeous! To this day, we say, "but it was a
beautiful day!"
-Out of town relatives decided that they needed to visit Mt. Washington
that day. Two family members took two cars for this excursion.
-In town relative who had been hospitalized for the past week, now decided that she's signing herself out AMA, tying up another family member. I have a small family, we were getting stretched for people and vehicles by now. But never fear: the in-laws had brought two vintage pink Cadillacs, which would be used in lieu of limosines.
-The poof slip (ala ADqtPi Mel) isn't with the dress. Fiance & brother sent to get it; my car returns with several dings from future brother in law wanting to drive it. The slip? Oh, that took a
second trip!
-The printer called, they couldn't finish the program due to illness; it was fetched to be finished and printed at Kinko's.
-At this point, my mother had this hinky feeling that the tables weren't going to be set up properly (despite the elaborate seating chart). She & my brother went to the Country Club. The tables weren't set up properly, and the custodians locked themselves into a closet and got high. My mother & brother moved the tables themselves.
-They realized that the florist hasn't been there yet, but noticed those horrible Hallmark honeycomb things in a pile near the head table. They didn't dare tell me, just in case they were for something else.
-I had made my veil, knowing that the last part couldn't be finished until the wedding day (fresh flowers). Still no florist. A kid drops by with a bag of SILK flowers, lisping, "these are for the veil." I looked at the hot glue gun in my hand and decide to spare the kid and go for the mother later.
-An old friend stopped by, with 8 dozen pizelles and her two-year-old. The two-year-old decided to roll herself inside of the veil. Trying to extract her without leaving red lollipop marks was not a fun part of the day.
-My new in-laws, having seen the new dings on my car, decided 30 minutes before the wedding, against letting us use the pink Cadillacs!! All of the family cars are out touring, springing people from the hospital, setting things up, or otherwise engaged. I had to take the one car left to the car wash, and when the owner asked me what was I doing there, I said, "I'm getting married in a half an hour, and there's no other car to wash!" One of the good parts of the day: free carwash.
-Somehow, we got to the church. The flowers were beautiful, the candlebras shining, the bridesmaids looked lovely, the flower girl angelic - maybe this was going to work out after all. I had lost so much weight that my dress needed to be taken in 8" in the waist. It had looked fine at the salon, but somehow, with the pouf slip, the V-neckline plunged so low, I couldn't even
lean forward. We tried to stitch it up a little bit, but the girls wouldn't cooperate. *sigh* I had more pictures of men looking down my bodice than I care to remember.
-Did I mention that the pastor who was giving the blessing now had Alzheimer's? Well, nobody told me, either. Mary and Herman, whoever you are, were duly blessed.
-The wedding party was cramped into a green vintage Dodge Charger, a Petty-blue vintage Plymouth Barracuda, and a white Subaru Legacy - followed, of course, by the two vintage pink Cadillacs, with 2 people in each.
-No flowers on the tables at the Reception - those honeycomb things are there, which my bridesmaids & I quickly ripped off of each table before anyone saw them. The anteroom, which is supposed to be flowing with wine, cheese, and appetizers, was empty. The caterer had forgotten about them.
And actually, I could go on and on, but y'all get the idea. Halfway through the ceremony, I literally visualized myself walking out, but I didn't. In retrospect, it would have been the wisest thing to do!
Hybrid Mode
