A similar thing has gone on at our campus, also with deferred formal recruitment - one of the chapters on our campus sent IM to the freshman the week before formal rush, with messages like "can't wait to meet you", ect...I think your daughter and her friends reaction is just why this shouldn't be done, it makes the PNM's uncomfortable! Our chapter closed all of their facebook accounts the week they were back for polish week just to be sure that NOTHING like this happens.
The ironic thing is that the group that did this was the chapter that turns in more recruitment infraction complaints against other chapters than all of the other chapters combined...
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