Pregnant and in a sorority

[Tom Earp]

Originally Posted by kddani

Exactly. She was given all the information, then still decided to drop. As much as we believe a sorority is for life, we can't MAKE people stay in it. It just seems desperate for everyone to beg her to stay when she really hasn't shown even the slightest inkling of desire to stay a ZTA.

And you know this how?

Have you ever been in this position, I doubt it!


I am sure she is out or on here asking for help on what she should try to do!

It seems that she cares about ZTA and cares about them very much.

She is in a dire situation and is a lost sole, scared and looking for some help and leadership!

Were you ever young?

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

And you know this how?
...
I am sure she is out or on here asking for help on what she should try to do!
...

She was given advice from several people. They can only give her so much guidance; the ultimate decision lies with her. And as much as it may hurt her sisters, she's an adult, so she can make adult decisions.

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

And you know this how?

Have you ever been in this position, I doubt it!


I am sure she is out or on here asking for help on what she should try to do!

It seems that she cares about ZTA and cares about them very much.

She is in a dire situation and is a lost sole, scared and looking for some help and leadership!

Were you ever young?

Did you read the responses? She has been given very good, firm advice from her sister ZTAs and other GLO members - and has made it clear that she isn't really looking for advice, as she doesn't intend to take it. I guess she came here looking for support or validation for a course of action she had already determined to follow. That is certainly her right, but don't you dare start with your negative attitude when my fellow NPC women have given her every chance to PROVE her so-called love for ZTA by treating it as more than a college club. She really just wants the easy way out - which is fine - but we are going to call a spade a spade. I realize you LIVE to castigate certain individuals as much as possible, but this really gets me, because it so totally unwarranted.
Yes, we have all been young, and many of us have dealt with the issue of early alumnae status as collegians and alumnae advisors. She has received support, positive advice, and encouragement.

[Thetagirl218]

I know this may be a strange question now, but can she just give up her membership? I guess maybe another ZTA can answer this.


I know in Theta, we don't have inactive status, so if an active was in this situation she would have to go early alum.

[ZTAmillz]

Originally Posted by Thetagirl218

I know this may be a strange question now, but can she just give up her membership? I guess maybe another ZTA can answer this.


I know in Theta, we don't have inactive status, so if an active was in this situation she would have to go early alum.

We do not have inactive status in ZTA either. Thats why everyone is so encouraging her to go early alum. She should call her advisor or someone at IO and she could stay in ZTA if she understand that it is a lifetime.

zl

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Did you read the responses? She has been given very good, firm advice from her sister ZTAs and other GLO members - and has made it clear that she isn't really looking for advice, as she doesn't intend to take it. I guess she came here looking for support or validation for a course of action she had already determined to follow. That is certainly her right, but don't you dare start with your negative attitude when my fellow NPC women have given her every chance to PROVE her so-called love for ZTA by treating it as more than a college club. She really just wants the easy way out - which is fine - but we are going to call a spade a spade.

One can want and listen to advice even if they choose not to follow it.
If ZTA is not a high enough priority for her to fight for at this point in time, then this is understandable. She has a lot of other things that are higher on her list of priorities. She is now aware that she has the option of going alum, but appears to feel as if this is her chapter's way of telling her they disapprove of her pregnancy. Her response is to turn away from them, very natural. One can love something and choose to let it go.

I realize who this post was in response to, hence it's abrasiveness, but you're making a lot of assumptions about a young woman based apparently only on the fact that she's choosing not to follow advice that, while well intentioned, may not be in her best interests at this time.

[violetpretty]

So many posters have given her solid advice.
We explained the differences between withdrawing and early alumna status. We told her that her the implications of withdrawing.
We told her that her chapter's EC and the seniors do not have the final say in her membership status.
We've told her that it probably won't be much of a fight if she would just make one phone call to an advisor, who most certainly has the power to let her go early alum without paying this semester's dues.
The OP initially wanted to know how to tell her chapter, and stated that she "loves ZTA and still wants to be involved with ZTA" and then a couple of pages/days later her "priorities are changing so much", but someone who ignores such solid advice, without even attempting to call an advisor is a troll in my book.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

So many posters have given her solid advice.
We explained the differences between withdrawing and early alumna status. We told her that her the implications of withdrawing.
We told her that her chapter's EC and the seniors do not have the final say in her membership status.
We've told her that it probably won't be much of a fight if she would just make one phone call to an advisor, who most certainly has the power to let her go early alum without paying this semester's dues.
The OP initially wanted to know how to tell her chapter, and stated that she "loves ZTA and still wants to be involved with ZTA" and then a couple of pages/days later her "priorities are changing so much", but someone who ignores such solid advice, without even attempting to call an advisor is a troll in my book.

Who is to say she's ignoring it. Not following it isn't the same.

I don't think she's a troll at all.

[SWTXBelle]

TROLL!
(waiting for a chance to use that picture, lol)

[SWTXBelle]

I don't think she's a definite troll - but I do think "ignore" is a good word to use. She acts as if the advice she has received (especially from fellow ZTAs) wasn't even posted - her response is to talk about what her chapter sisters have said and feel, even though it has been spelled out to her that they are not the final authority.
I also do think it fair to say that everyone has made it clear that OF COURSE ZTA is a lower priority than her upcoming marriage and child - but the reality is that if she drops, that's it, cupcake. Years from now, when her child is older and she is in a position to be an active alumna, she will not have that option. If you love something - ANYTHING - you will not let it go without a fight. Hence my perhaps harsh "so-called love" statement. I don't want her to throw away something so valuable without realizing that is what she is doing. I think it has been made clear to her that 1.) early alum IS AN OPTION if she is willing to make a few phone calls and that 2.) if she drops, that is it. She will no longer be a ZTA. That's all we can do - tell her the realities and let her make her own, adult choice.
I honestly hope her actions, whatever they are, will ultimately make her happy, and wish her the best of luck with the rest of her life.