Is 40 to old to join a sorority?

[AOII_LB93]

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

I don't understand that whole thing either. It really depends on the type of organization this woman is trying to join. Among the NPHC, alumnae initiation (although we don't refer to it as "AI," just alumnae or grad) is encouraged and supported. While the interested persons might be more carefully selected for membership, there is nothing weird or odd about joining an NPHC org at the alumnae level. In fact Alumnae chapters (which include undergrad and grad initiates) are highly valued so much so that new undergrad chapters cannot be chartered unless there is an alumnae chapter close by to advise them. So it's important for the alumnae chapters to increase in membership. Ultimately it's the alumnae chapters that manage the business of the organizations at the local level.

So my advice...if she's interested in an NPHC org and she's 40 years old, I would suggest that she do her research and pursue membership at the grad level once she has achieved her bachelor's degree unless she can tolerate being around a bunch of young'uns all the time. I'm in an alumnae chapter (inducted as an undergrad) and we advise 5 undergrad chapters and we are very close to them. I love them dearly but I can't imagine being around them 24/7 now that I'm 30+.

Rhoyaltempest,
I don't know how many people are for or against AI. I've not taken a formal poll...what I do know is that I can liken a lot of what we (NPC members) have seen on GC is a lot of sorority shoppers as well as those who sought membership as undergrads, were denied for whatever reason, but yet still grasp the dream of being a member of ANY organization that will take them...so they seek out information on several groups at once and see who bites on the line (so to speak). I can gather from my reading of NPHC boards/posts that the same type of behaviour (i.e. expressing interest in multiple NPHC orgs) seems to be highly discouraged if not down right looked very poorly upon.

I feel the same way, and I will admit it openly. Does that mean I am anti AI? Not all all, I think there are many wonderful women who are now AOIIs that came in through Alumnae Initiation. Some people here on GC, and some in the past who have departed to other message boards seemed to push the idea on anyone who couldn't get in during "normal" recruitment, or those who just said they were interested. A lot of the NPC members (even AIs) have gotten tired of the questions about membership that way...because some were saying it was super easy to do...which for the most part it's not.

I can say that my organization is much like yours in that if there is not the alumnae support from a local alum group or several it does not seem like we would even consider colonization at that college or university.

[DZRose]

Originally Posted by AOII_LB93

Rhoyaltempest,
I don't know how many people are for or against AI. I've not taken a formal poll...what I do know is that I can liken a lot of what we (NPC members) have seen on GC is a lot of sorority shoppers as well as those who sought membership as undergrads, were denied for whatever reason, but yet still grasp the dream of being a member of ANY organization that will take them...so they seek out information on several groups at once and see who bites on the line (so to speak). I can gather from my reading of NPHC boards/posts that the same type of behaviour (i.e. expressing interest in multiple NPHC orgs) seems to be highly discouraged if not down right looked very poorly upon.

I feel the same way, and I will admit it openly. Does that mean I am anti AI? Not all all, I think there are many wonderful women who are now AOIIs that came in through Alumnae Initiation. Some people here on GC, and some in the past who have departed to other message boards seemed to push the idea on anyone who couldn't get in during "normal" recruitment, or those who just said they were interested. A lot of the NPC members (even AIs) have gotten tired of the questions about membership that way...because some were saying it was super easy to do...which for the most part it's not.

I can say that my organization is much like yours in that if there is not the alumnae support from a local alum group or several it does not seem like we would even consider colonization at that college or university.

Thanks for taking the time earlier in the post to answer my questions in an intelligent manner (not trying to imply that you wouldn't). I sometimes hesitate to ask for clarification by some GC'ers because sometimes the responses are very critical and rude.

While I also don't have any issues with women seeking membership as AI, if I found out a AI PNM had attempted to rush and was never extended a bid, I would doubt if I would consider her for AI. I agree that it can be harder, because of the exact problem you mentioned above. Unfortunately, I am not very knowledgable about opinions of NPHC groups when it comes to AI. If the general consensus is not favorable, then I would discourage her from pursuing that option.

Re: alumnae support of new collegiate chapters. I think any organization attempting to colonize at a campus would be foolish to try and do so without any local alumnae support. I believe for DZ this is often a crucial point when considering on weather to present to campuses seeking additional greek groups.

[OOhsoflyDELTA#9]

Originally Posted by AOII_LB93

Rhoyaltempest,
I don't know how many people are for or against AI. I've not taken a formal poll...what I do know is that I can liken a lot of what we (NPC members) have seen on GC is a lot of sorority shoppers as well as those who sought membership as undergrads, were denied for whatever reason, but yet still grasp the dream of being a member of ANY organization that will take them...so they seek out information on several groups at once and see who bites on the line (so to speak). I can gather from my reading of NPHC boards/posts that the same type of behaviour (i.e. expressing interest in multiple NPHC orgs) seems to be highly discouraged if not down right looked very poorly upon.

I feel the same way, and I will admit it openly. Does that mean I am anti AI? Not all all, I think there are many wonderful women who are now AOIIs that came in through Alumnae Initiation. Some people here on GC, and some in the past who have departed to other message boards seemed to push the idea on anyone who couldn't get in during "normal" recruitment, or those who just said they were interested. A lot of the NPC members (even AIs) have gotten tired of the questions about membership that way...because some were saying it was super easy to do...which for the most part it's not.

I can say that my organization is much like yours in that if there is not the alumnae support from a local alum group or several it does not seem like we would even consider colonization at that college or university.

so now I wanna understand this better....you compared this to someone "shopping" for a NPHC sorority which is frowned upon...this is because most of us (NPHCers) feel as if you should feel ONE sorority/organization in your heart and continue to pursue that org for as long as it takes...but from my understanding of your (NPC) undergrad process, you don't know where you are going to end up anyway, right....so whats the difference if a person does that at the graduate level...or why is wrong for a young woman to have wanted XYZ undergrad, not get a bid, then try at the graudate level??? IMO it shows dedication to your org to try again...I have a linesister who tried 3 times before making it...I know that if she had not made it then she would have tried at the graduate level...she loves Delta and what it stands for that much....the post I've read here about the AI process makes it seems to an outsider looking in as if the NPC members feel that someone is SOL if they don't get a bid undergrad....is this true?? If so are your alumnae chapters only for members who were initiated undergrad to continue their activitites in the organizations...???

ETA: I re-read the post that I quoted and I'm also curious abouts wrong if a woman was not interested in greek life undergrad but now once she's estabished is??? Why is that a bad thing??? Again, just curiousity here from the other side...

[33girl]

Originally Posted by OOhsoflyDELTA#9

If so are your alumnae chapters only for members who were initiated undergrad to continue their activitites in the organizations...???

For the most part, yes. All the NPHC groups initiate women at the graduate/alumnae level; this is not true of all the NPC groups.

Originally Posted by OOhsoflyDELTA#9

so now I wanna understand this better....you compared this to someone "shopping" for a NPHC sorority which is frowned upon...this is because most of us (NPHCers) feel as if you should feel ONE sorority/organization in your heart and continue to pursue that org for as long as it takes...but from my understanding of your (NPC) undergrad process, you don't know where you are going to end up anyway, right....so whats the difference if a person does that at the graduate level...or why is wrong for a young woman to have wanted XYZ undergrad, not get a bid, then try at the graudate level??? IMO it shows dedication to your org to try again...I have a linesister who tried 3 times before making it...I know that if she had not made it then she would have tried at the graduate level...she loves Delta and what it stands for that much.

Well, for starters, there are 4 NPHC groups vs 26 NPC groups. To think that a woman could devote the amount of time to researching all the NPCs that she (hopefully) does to researching the NPHCs before deciding which one she wants to pursue just isn't feasible.

Plus, from my observations on GC, if NPHC-to-be women aren't that crazy about the women in their local chapter, they still suck it up and pursue membership because that's the GROUP that they feel the connection with. In NPC undergrad rush, for the most part, that would NEVER happen. If you hated all the ASAs, even if you loved what ASA stood for and the colors and the motto and the philanthropy...you probably wouldn't pledge ASA.

To sum it up and generalize...NPC women pledge the people...NPHC women pledge the group as an entity. I'm not saying it doesn't go the other way sometimes, but that really is the gist of it.

So, when a woman shows up here and says she has no connection to any sorority - no family members, no friends, no involvement of any kind in college OR now - and goes on about how the website spoke to her or something of that ilk, and that's the MOST she's looked into it...well, she's gonna get a few of these.

As to the woman who wanted XYZ undergrad, rushed but didn't get a bid and then wants to AI...well, the way I look at it is, I trust my sisters and the chapter involved made a decision and I'm not going to flout that decision. This gets a little too far into discussing membership selection for NPC and NPHC, so I'll just leave it at that.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Plus, from my observations on GC, if NPHC-to-be women aren't that crazy about the women in their local chapter, they still suck it up and pursue membership because that's the GROUP that they feel the connection with.

That's often the case.

But, as a generalization, I believe that for every group of women that has pursued Delta there are many who have not because they don't like the particular chapter/particular women they've interacted with. Of course there are other reasons.

So it all depends. I used to tell people to go for Delta regardless of the chapter and its dynamics/the campus dynamics. I used to also frown at women who did not pursue Delta as undergrads and waited until alumnae because it seemed as though they were running from something or someone. But situations vary and there are reasons for everything.

I now save my frowns for a case-by-case basis.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by OOhsoflyDELTA#9

I have a linesister who tried 3 times before making it...I know that if she had not made it then she would have tried at the graduate level...she loves Delta and what it stands for that much....

Warms my heart.