Is 40 to old to join a sorority?

afrikanscholar · #1 10-29-2007, 06:15 PM

Well I'm 40 years old and just decided that i want to go back to school. The only problem is I dont want to show up to school and apply for a sorority if it's not permitted to my age group. So please help me not make a fool of myself.

skylark · #2 10-29-2007, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by afrikanscholar

Well I'm 40 years old and just decided that i want to go back to school. The only problem is I dont want to show up to school and apply for a sorority if it's not permitted to my age group. So please help me not make a fool of myself.

While I'm sure more seasoned GCers will soon be on to give you a better idea, this is what I've surmised from my experience at my school and also reading GC threads:

- Most (if not all) groups do not have an age limit, per se, but because the selection process is to a certain extent based on who a group feels comfortable with, there will be many groups that will not be able to see past the fact that you are much older than them. Some of it may be for superficial reasons, but I can imagine my former self in college feeling sort of skeptical in whether I could have a peer-relationship with a 40 year old woman in a sorority. I'd like to think I'm more enlightened now, but that is one thing maturity brings.
- Being barred from the process because of age and receiving a bid are two separate things. A lot will depend on where you are going through recruitment. If it is a competitive recruitment school, women who are less likely to fit the "ideal sorority candidate" mold for that school are unfortunately more likely to get through the process without having received a bid. If it is a less competitive school in terms of recruitment, then who is to say whether there will be a group of 20 something women who find that you would be a great addition to their group and you feel you would like to join.
- In short, find out more about your school and how competitive the process is to better assess your specific situation, and then decide if the chance of having a sorority experience is worth taking the chance of going through recruitment and not receiving a bid.

Senusret I · #3 10-29-2007, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by afrikanscholar

Well I'm 40 years old and just decided that i want to go back to school. The only problem is I dont want to show up to school and apply for a sorority if it's not permitted to my age group. So please help me not make a fool of myself.

What type of sorority are you interested in?

NutBrnHair · #4 10-30-2007, 01:21 AM

An NPC group? Yes, I think you are too old.

Titchou · #5 10-31-2007, 12:28 PM

When I was Membership Adviser (rush), we had a 30 year old come thru recruitment. I never said a word about her age nor did any adviser. The chapter president asked "why a 30 year old would want to hang out with 18 and 19 year old hormone driven twits?" Frankly, I thought that was very astute of her. She couldn't see the chapter assimilating this woman due to what she rightly perceived as a maturity issue, not an age issue. We had advisers younger than this woman. What sort of relationship would you as a 40 year old expect to have with 18 and 19 year olds? I think the disparity in maturity and life experience would be too great to operate properly in a college sorority environment. How on earth would you relate at a fraternity mixer? Very difficult.

33girl · #6 10-31-2007, 12:41 PM

It all depends what kind of sorority, and what the campus is like. If 3/4 of the campus is returning students, obviously everyone else is going to be "old" also.

Not only that....not all sororities have fraternity mixers.

DaemonSeid · #7 10-31-2007, 12:53 PM

I thought 40 was the new 25 or sumn....LOL

DSTCHAOS · #8 10-31-2007, 12:53 PM

Many sororities don't officially bar people over a certain age. Unofficially you will run into some obstacles based on the particular chapter.

I don't see why someone who is 40 would want to be in a collegiate chapter. If you're looking at a commuter school where people are over the traditional college age, the members of the sororities are often a nonrepresentative sample and still tend to be in their 20s. What do you really have in common with those younger women besides being a college student (and being sisters in a sorority that you love)?

You can love most of the same sororities at the alumnae chapter level. There, you will be able to interact with sisters younger, your age, and older and you won't be confined to collegiate level activities, schedules, and concepts of sisterhood.

But I completely understand wanting the collegiate experience. I know mostly men who have joined NPHC fraternities in their 30s (rarely in their 40s). They loved the experience but did it because they wanted the collegiate experience as distinct from the graduate chapter experience. Not because they truly felt they would really want to be running around with 19-20 year olders. Aside from the social events where they relived their youth, they ended up doing a lot of the service events and serving as mentors to the younger chapter members.

OtterXO · #9 10-31-2007, 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NutBrnHair

An NPC group? Yes, I think you are too old.

I second that. I understand the desire to be involved on campus no matter what your age, but NPC groups are pretty much geared towards the typical college aged crowd. I remember a guy who was a 6th year engineering student (he had changed majors at some point) who was 24 and he seemed ancient when I was in college (so sad, I know). We all couldn't understand why he wanted to hang out with people so much younger. I think it would be much worse for a 40 year old.

kdxut · #10 11-02-2007, 01:18 PM

Depending on what you hope to accomplish when joining the sorority would be the determining factor. My sorority has no age limit and is community service driven, there are some that focus on social, there are others that are academic, it just depends on what you're interests are and if you'd get along with them that's all that should matter in my opinion.

whiteandblack · #11 11-03-2007, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by afrikanscholar

Well I'm 40 years old and just decided that i want to go back to school. The only problem is I dont want to show up to school and apply for a sorority if it's not permitted to my age group. So please help me not make a fool of myself.

you seem young and spry, go for it.

DZRose · #12 11-03-2007, 05:56 PM

While I know that DZ has no age limit, as a 35 year-old woman, I can't imagine why I'd want to spend a lot of my time associating with women nearly half my age. I love my collegiate sisters, but their lives and what is important to them is so different from mine.

Maybe you could contact local alumnae chapters of the sororities in your area and speak to them about possibly becoming an alumnae initiate? You would still be able to share the experience of sisterhood, but get the benefit of hanging out with women who most likely have more in common with you than the younger members.

AKA_Monet · #13 11-04-2007, 01:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by afrikanscholar

Well I'm 40 years old and just decided that i want to go back to school. The only problem is I dont want to show up to school and apply for a sorority if it's not permitted to my age group. So please help me not make a fool of myself.

I think you should do your research about the organizations you want to join and see if it is something that is critically important for your life at this time.

Your primary reason for going to college is to get an education. When you join any organization, it should also go along with your values that you support.

Good luck on your endeavors.

puddintane · #14 11-04-2007, 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

It all depends what kind of sorority, and what the campus is like. If 3/4 of the campus is returning students, obviously everyone else is going to be "old" also.

Not only that....not all sororities have fraternity mixers.

You are very, very correct. We have a nearby school that does have alot of returning students and there is a mix of age ranges in their Greek system. You see more older students in the fraternities rather than sororities.

I don't think it's a matter of wanting to "hang out" with women who are not just 18 and 19-year olds, but with more and more seniors delaying college or taking longer to graduate, most of the seniors that graduate from here are 23 and 24 years old.

While I can understand if your particular school has only a younger crowd, fully dismissing what an older student has to offer is the same thing as saying as your advisors have nothing to offer the sorority either...and we all know that isn't true.

Keep in mind that GPA to GPA, adult students usually outperform, younger students, and to be able to tap into that life experience, in my opinon, is valuable.

Sororities are for the promotion of women, younger women as a tradition, but I just think it's important to be open minded.

skylark · #15 11-04-2007, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by puddintane

Keep in mind that GPA to GPA, adult students usually outperform, younger students, and to be able to tap into that life experience, in my opinon, is valuable.

I've noticed that too with non-trads. They are also a lot more into the class discussions, on average. My own conclusions from these observations is just that non-trad people aren't in college for the social aspects, as well as for the educational aspects. Perhaps that's because most of them already have been busy creating an outside life for themselves before coming to college, whereas traditional students are kind of starting out their entire lives from scratch when they come to college, in certain ways.

I guess the OP here is kind of the exception since she wants to be focused on things in college besides her classes.