Bid day "Mismatch"

[augreekmom]

Thanks so much for all the helpful and thoughtful advice. After talking with many from this board and others that have much more insight on this than I do, I understand that just getting a bid from a large SEC school was an accomplishment in itself. For whatever reason, the sorority where my daughter ended up had loved her from the beginning and let her know that every time she visited. She doesn't understand their attraction to her, especially since this is not a very athletically involved bunch, but she is already talking about forming an intramural team if she can find some girls that are willing. If not she will try to find other ways to participate in activities that she loves. She is trying very hard to shake off her disappointment and find the positive side in the way things have turned out.

My daughter has met most of her pledge class and so far has found one young lady that shares her views on the whole "party" issue that is willing to admit it to the group. She also played the same sport in high school. My daughter will continue to seek out other like minded girls and by no means will just bail without giving it a honest effort. She is very lucky in that she has a wonderful group of friends that have rallied around her and are encouraging her to stick it out and "let the dust settle" so she can see how things really are. On a positive note, she really loves the chapter colors and is pleased that they match her dorm room colors, lol. Thanks so much to everyone for all your encouragement and advice. I understand that if she can figure out a way around the drinking and frat party issues (she has a steady boyfriend), that the rewards of sorority life far outway the bad side.

AUGreekMom

[Molly05]

Two years ago I listened to my daughter cry over not getting the sorority she thought she should have. She decided that she wanted the Greek experience enough to give it a try anyway. Today she is a leader in the sorority that she "wouldn't fit in with" and loves it dearly. I understand your concern as a mom, but with the leadership skills your daughter has, this sorority may be the place for her to use those, even more than the other sororities that she wanted. It's still a tough time for both of you and I pray your daughter's experience turns out as well as mine did.

[FSUZeta]

yes, yes, yes to what the majority have said.

i am so glad that your daughter has found one sister with similar interests. in a few more days, i bet she has several more girls to add to that list. she will probably get a few more temporary big sisters before her permanent one is assigned, and i know that the officer in charge of that puts a lot of time and effort into trying to make each match a success.

i remember when i first pledged that i was just sort of dazed about the whole process-rush, receiving a bid, the bid day party, meeting all my pledge sisters-my head seemed to swim. it took me a few weeks to find my little niche within the pledge class, but i did.

i am so glad that your daughter has offered to help form an intramural team-all the intitiated sisters must be so impressed-i know i would be! it seems that she is already willing to take on leadership roles. good for her!!

i hope things work out for her. she is taking her rough start and turning it into a golden opportunity. good luck to her!

[adpiucf]

Originally Posted by ZTAngel

My 2nd choice I would have been happy with but definitely not my third.

I say that your daughter give it a few weeks but if she still feels uncomfortable than by all means she should drop out before initiation.

What she said! And ZTAngel, for the record, if you'd have gotten your second choice instead of your first, I'd have been very happy to have you across the street!

AUmom-- your daughter sounds like a terrific girl. The chances of getting a bid at a school like Auburn as an upperclassman are going to be rare, so I do think she should stay put and give it some more time-- at least until just before initiation week.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by augreekmom

For whatever reason, the sorority where my daughter ended up had loved her from the beginning and let her know that every time she visited. She doesn't understand their attraction to her, especially since this is not a very athletically involved bunch, but she is already talking about forming an intramural team if she can find some girls that are willing.

It might be that there are women who would like to be good at athletics but they just aren't - and admire her skills. A lot of times we choose friends and significant others because they have things that "complete" us. I can't throw a ball or anything to save my life, nor could most of my sisters, but we would have been thrilled to pledge an athlete. I don't think most people want to be around absolute clones of themselves all the time.