Quote:
Originally Posted by marquise1911
Ladies and Gents. What happened? I know this problem reaches far out of my fraternity. Black men period! I don't know many of my peers period who are in positive long term committed relationships or married. How will our people ever mend our family structure when we no longer value one of it's most essential ties.
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You're silly for that signature.
Long story short (since this topic is actually a really in depth one):
I don't think it has to do with being "playas for life" or the typical relationship concerns that people in this thread are discussing. It has to do with extra-familial factors such as commitment to careers that makes men and women (surprisingly, women of particular races encounter this even more than men do) end up 30+ and unmarried. People want to be educationally and professionally established before starting a family. And unfortunately there tends to be a dichotomy between work and family so it's difficult to successfully have and be commited to both. Back in the day, the black community was (even more) disproportionately undereducated, underemployed in professional fields, and not of the middle to upperclass. So of course people would be focused on the one thing they thought they could focus on and be successful in: family.
The gender and race literature and research spell this out quite well.
Now I wish that we could get more people to remember that "starting a family" includes having children. If you don't want to settle down with one person yet because of professional or whatever concerns, don't have children either. Do your best to keep all of your eggs in one basket. With exception given to extenuating circumstances.
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