Too fat to recruit: or, DePauw, the Sequel

[kathykd2005]

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

It's so weird to me to learn that people actually cared about the quality of the frill of groups during rush. My campus was so heavily tipped toward prior reputation, I can't imagine door chants making a difference.

Sometimes at smaller schools, that is what gives a chapter the leg-up. Sad, but true. This is why so many chapters spend so much money on Recruitment, because they are attempting to undermine the rumors that the PNMs have heard on campus about each house.

[UGAalum94]

Originally Posted by kathykd2005

Sometimes at smaller schools, that is what gives a chapter the leg-up. Sad, but true. This is why so many chapters spend so much money on Recruitment, because they are attempting to undermine the rumors that the PNMs have heard on campus about each house.

Oh, I'm not from a small school.

There's a very strong tradition at many big campuses too. And tradition is often a function of reputation earned or unearned.

Frills, no frills, dress up, dress casually, I don't think you're ever going to really get people to consider what you want them to.

But you can make it less wasteful, and that's a positive end right there.

[kathykd2005]

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

Oh, I'm not from a small school.

There's a very strong tradition at many big campuses too. And tradition is often a function of reputation earned or unearned.

Frills, no frills, dress up, dress casually, I don't think you're ever going to really get people to consider what you want them to.

But you can make it less wasteful, and that's a positive end right there.

Exactly! Just think about some of the money these chapters waste on recruitment, when they could use the money for something worthwhile, or something that furthers their deeper purpose!

[FSUZeta]

now i know that none of us know this young woman, or her chapter, but i would tend to guess that looks were not the only thing the decision to ask her not to participate in recruitment was based on.

first,you can bet that each npc sorority headquarters closely monitored the depauw situation. noone wants to live through a similar situation.

second, if this young woman was the star rusher in her chapter, i believe that they would want her front and center, no matter her shape or size. the best rusher in the chapter i advise is a large young woman. i wanted this sister to rush the girls that the entire chapter had as rush crushes, because she has a wonderful personality and is a great conversationlist-she could talk the paint off a wall. i made sure that she preffed someone at every pref. party. everyone she rushed joined. i'm just sorry that she graduated in may!

[kathykd2005]

Doesn't that stink when that happens? I felt the same way when the sister that recruited ME graduated--she was a year older. Also, she happened to be a bigger girl, with a personality just as vivacious and big! The good thing is, hopefully some of the younger sisters learned from the sister you are talking about!!! I know I learned a lot from the particular lady of which I am speaking. She rocked (and still does)!!!

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

now i know that none of us know this young woman, or her chapter, but i would tend to guess that looks were not the only thing the decision to ask her not to participate in recruitment was based on.

first,you can bet that each npc sorority headquarters closely monitored the depauw situation. noone wants to live through a similar situation.

second, if this young woman was the star rusher in her chapter, i believe that they would want her front and center, no matter her shape or size. the best rusher in the chapter i advise is a large young woman. i wanted this sister to rush the girls that the entire chapter had as rush crushes, because she has a wonderful personality and is a great conversationlist-she could talk the paint off a wall. i made sure that she preffed someone at every pref. party. everyone she rushed joined. i'm just sorry that she graduated in may!

[KSUViolet06]

My chapter had girls in it who were plus sized. We didn't hide them. I don't think it affects us in recruitment because I don't think any other chapter did either.

Due to our school's roster policy, we couldn't hide girls during recruitment if we wanted to.

Our Panhellenic had a Rho Chi come around and physically count the number of sorority members in the party and check it against that chapter's roster. If the numbers didn't match, you either had to explain why or risk having to go in front of Judicial Board for having an incorrect roster.

I think this was instituted moreso to keep sororities from lying on their rosters than it does with hiding plus sized girls (sororities that were at total, would not update their university rosters so they could continue to recruit in the spring).

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Let's drop the debate about whether rushees care about fat girls and whether you want superficial rushees in your chapter, and work from the following premise:

Hiding the fat girls in back will ensure more rushees pledge your chapter.

If you know that to be true, is it worth it to hurt a sister's feelings? My answer is yes. The only way for a small chapter to recover at a big school is to increase numbers.

I know I will get a lot of responses about quality over quantity, but you simply can not be a strong chapter if you are much smaller than the others. You don't have the money, you don't have the number of women volunteering their time as officers, and you don't have the presence on campus.

It's unfortunate, but it has to be done.

[kathykd2005]

It doesn't HAVE to be done, at all. There are other avenues of dealing with the situation, aside from the concept of "quality over quantity." It's just plain cruel--can you imagine if it happened to YOU? What if you were the person who was overweight and hidden by the same sisters who professed to LOVE you? What if the sister had a medical condition that caused her to gain weight, or something else medically wrong? Or, what if the chapter that was suffering was YOURS? Think about it--I doubt you would view it in the same way...

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Let's drop the debate about whether rushees care about fat girls and whether you want superficial rushees in your chapter, and work from the following premise:

Hiding the fat girls in back will ensure more rushees pledge your chapter.

If you know that to be true, is it worth it to hurt a sister's feelings? My answer is yes. The only way for a small chapter to recover at a big school is to increase numbers.

I know I will get a lot of responses about quality over quantity, but you simply can not be a strong chapter if you are much smaller than the others. You don't have the money, you don't have the number of women volunteering their time as officers, and you don't have the presence on campus.

It's unfortunate, but it has to be done.

[pialpha92]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Let's drop the debate about whether rushees care about fat girls and whether you want superficial rushees in your chapter, and work from the following premise:

Hiding the fat girls in back will ensure more rushees pledge your chapter.

If you know that to be true, is it worth it to hurt a sister's feelings? My answer is yes. The only way for a small chapter to recover at a big school is to increase numbers.

But I don't think this occurring is exclusive to struggling chapters or bigger campuses. Unfortunately, there are shallow chapters (or advisors) across the spectrum. I think it is sad that some chapters will hide members 'in the kitchen' based solely on superficial reasons. It is one thing if the member asks to be there - quite another to tell them they are not good enough.

If they are good enough to be your sister the other 51 weeks of the year they should be good enough to be your sister during recruitment.

[bluefish81]

I have to think that there's more to this than just the member's weight, i.e. perhaps she can't recruit very well. How many times do we personally remember or have read a story about a PNM that went to XYZ chapter and they had to carry the conversation? Thus had a bad impression of the chapter and cut it as result. I'm not in favor of having women of any size sit out, but I think it's important to put the best recruiters out there, especially if you're trying to help a sinking ship. There's a lot of other things to be done during recruitment besides just talking to PNMs.

[UGAalum94]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Let's drop the debate about whether rushees care about fat girls and whether you want superficial rushees in your chapter, and work from the following premise:

Hiding the fat girls in back will ensure more rushees pledge your chapter.

If you know that to be true, is it worth it to hurt a sister's feelings? My answer is yes. The only way for a small chapter to recover at a big school is to increase numbers.

I know I will get a lot of responses about quality over quantity, but you simply can not be a strong chapter if you are much smaller than the others. You don't have the money, you don't have the number of women volunteering their time as officers, and you don't have the presence on campus.

It's unfortunate, but it has to be done.

I'm not sure that the premise can actually be accepted period.* I'm willing to go along with the idea that it's in the interest of the chapter to manipulate the superficial aspects of recruitment to some degree, but the ill-will within the chapter such a move will create with the member and her authentic friends will counteract any "appearance" based benefits.

I agree that chapters are better taking full new member classes with some girls who weren't rush crushes rather than taking only a few new members who they worshiped and not making quota. When you don't make quota, no one thinks "well they only took the top girls they wanted": people think, "they couldn't find enough girls who liked them."

But being mean to current members about appearance won't necessarily get you more PNMs in the real world.

*I draw the line of what's unacceptable long before we're trying to hide fat people, but even if I didn't: it just wouldn't work from a pragmatic point of view. Your chapter has a reputation that exists before recruitment. If you have a number of overweight members, these members are seen in letters all the time on campus. If your group is small and has several overweight members, members having to double rush because you're hiding other people will cause more problems and make you seem even smaller.

[Tippiechick]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Hiding the fat girls in back will ensure more rushees pledge your chapter.

If you know that to be true, is it worth it to hurt a sister's feelings? My answer is yes.

You make me want to stab my eyes out with your superficial bullshit.

BTW, in my experience, the kitchen members were from the largest chapters. Yes, I have met some of them...

To me, I would rather have 30 truly exceptional SISTERS than 300 women joined by name only.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by SECdomination

I'm sorry that you're getting torn apart, but I agree with you 100%.

Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, likes the idea of hiding the less appealing members. However, it is sometimes necessary for the long term success of the chapter.
It's being caught between a rock and a hard place.

Thank you. I know it hurts morale and such to ask a girl to be computer chair or on kitchen duty or something like that. You know what else hurts morale? Not making quota. By a lot. A lot of posters in this thread have never been in that situation.

Others have, and feel that it is better to close your chapter than hurt feelings. I disagree with that, and always will. What if HQ told you to get your chapter GPA up or be shut down? Would you be unwilling to put women on social probation or require study hours? It might hurt their feelings if you make them feel dumb, but I think few posters would hesitate here. What about women who can't pay their dues? If you try to put them on a payment plan and they still can't do it, do you let them remain a member forever without paying?