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Welcome to our newest member, haletivanov1698 |
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06-09-2007, 05:29 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: The river of hopes & dreams.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KSUViolet06
Okay, for the sake of not having a PNM read this and think that Sigmas are these awful people, I have to say something. That's not a nice comment at all, but if it was anonymous, you really don't know WHO posted that.
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Oh, no! You are absolutely right, I have no idea who posted it and I didn't intend for it to appear that a Sigma had. But, it was that comment that changed my entire perspective on the situation. Anyone could have posted it. Honestly, I'm thankful to whoever did.
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06-09-2007, 05:34 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Coastie Relocated in the Midwest
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlwaysSAI
Oh, no! You are absolutely right, I have no idea who posted it and I didn't intend for it to appear that a Sigma had. But, it was that comment that changed my entire perspective on the situation. Anyone could have posted it. Honestly, I'm thankful to whoever did.
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It could have been a Sigma, but it could have also just as esaily been one of your friends who was sick of you pining away for an organization that didn't want you.
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06-09-2007, 05:56 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JessSigKap
It could have been a Sigma, but it could have also just as esaily been one of your friends who was sick of you pining away for an organization that didn't want you.
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We will never know who it was. I don't want to pin it on any particular organization, because it was anonymous. My guess, is that it was one of my friends, because who else would care enough to read my livejournal.
The only reason I included it was because it affected my view of the situation. Had it not been for that comment, I would have gone to informal events in the spring, which I was already planning to do.
Either way, I'm still thanksful to whoever it was.
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06-09-2007, 07:58 PM
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i am truly sorry for the way things turned out. you pain and disappointment are palpable. i think that we can all learn something for this.
drawing from your experience, could you suggest a way that your favorite sorority(it was tri sigma at your campus, but it just as easily could have been any of the other 25 npc sororities on any other campus) might have handled things differently? for instance, do you think that it would have been better(and easier on you) if they had not put up flyers inviting any interested women to their parties, but had extended invitations instead?
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06-09-2007, 08:04 PM
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AlwaysSAI, you are such a talented writer! The way you describe the situations and your feelings --- it puts each of us right there, feeling your pain. Please please PLEASE go on with your story! I'm ready for the happy ending that I know must be right around the corner.....
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06-09-2007, 08:45 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: The river of hopes & dreams.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FSUZeta
drawing from your experience, could you suggest a way that your favorite sorority(it was tri sigma at your campus, but it just as easily could have been any of the other 25 npc sororities on any other campus) might have handled things differently? for instance, do you think that it would have been better(and easier on you) if they had not put up flyers inviting any interested women to their parties, but had extended invitations instead?
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These are things I have often considered. But, you have to understand that at this point in time this chapter was struggling. They were below quota when recruitment began and barely recieved half the women they extended bids to. I don't know of a way they could have extended invites to women....we don't have a COB list or any signing up involved in continuous recruitment.
I loved this chapter and in many ways I still do. Part of me still yearns to know the truth behind their sisterhood, but I understand that they were sustaining the life of their chapter which was a duty bestowed upon them by their nationals. I don't know of any better way for them to recruit women, than by putting up flyers. The one thing I do hate about continuous open bidding, though, is that on my campus, a PNM is never notified of a chapters feelings towards her. You either get a call or you don't. I think there could be a more efficient way of dealing with that. I would like to see my school take up a process I've seen described in other threads where the Office of Greek Life is much more involved. I would also like to see a much more structured COB process. But, I guess, if these things have or do happen, I won't know about it.
I don't think the members of that chapter did anything ill towards me. They felt that I was not a fit for their sisterhood, but that did not change my feelings for them and their national organization. Anyway they handled it, I still would have been upset. They achieved their goal in recruitment, at least with me, and that was to win over PNMs.
Just an update-this chapter is now THRIVING! Last time I checked their website they had 47 active sisters and chapter total on our campus is 55. So, they are doing GREAT!
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06-09-2007, 08:54 PM
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omg. i love your posts. i went into recruitment supereducated about all the groups as well. it's so difficult to feel that people you honestly thought enjoyed you as a person were not being upfront with you. and it sucks that honestly, they can't be. i admire your perseverance in such a difficult time and the fact that you have so much respect for Sigma (i preffed there too!) and other NPCs despite the outcomes. continue to tell your story as it may hopefully reach out to someone else who is going through something like this.
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06-09-2007, 09:14 PM
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Location: Coastie Relocated in the Midwest
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FSUZeta
i am truly sorry for the way things turned out. you pain and disappointment are palpable. i think that we can all learn something for this.
drawing from your experience, could you suggest a way that your favorite sorority(it was tri sigma at your campus, but it just as easily could have been any of the other 25 npc sororities on any other campus) might have handled things differently? for instance, do you think that it would have been better(and easier on you) if they had not put up flyers inviting any interested women to their parties, but had extended invitations instead?
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If they just stick with issuing invitations, then they will have a smaller pool of PNMs to choose from. That would be an approach that a chapter that is very close to total would take, but when you only made half of quota, you need to put your name out there. It sucks though, because there is no nice way to say "you can't join my sorority".
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06-09-2007, 10:09 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Learning how to skateboard.
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If your chapter is having informal rush, and a PNM whom you cut during formal rush comes to more than one rush event (which demonstrates that she has guts and class) and your chapter sticks with their decision not to invite her to join, IMHO it should be no skin off the membership's chairman's nose to buck up and call her, and kindly tell her thank you for coming, but I'm sorry we won't be giving you a bid.
It's tough to do, but it's the only classy way to handle a difficult situation for all! and it's really no different than an HR manager who has to call an applicant who has perhaps interviewed mulltiple times with your company to say, sorry, the position is not available. No detailed explanation is necessary, but courtesy demands the phone call, or even a tactful hand written note. Every PNM who comes to our recruitment events is our guest because we invited her to be there! I hate the don't let the door hit you in the *$% approach. That's what really gives NPC groups a bad name, and deservedly so.
please SAI....tell us more!
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Last edited by bejazd; 06-09-2007 at 10:12 PM.
Reason: grammar
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06-09-2007, 11:23 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2003
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JessSigKap
It sucks though, because there is no nice way to say "you can't join my sorority".
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Exactly. Any way you break the news, it still hurts. If they call you, don't call you, meet you in person, it won't change anything.
I'm sorry, just don't want this to become a "lets scrutinize the way this chapter conducted COB" thread. Everyone does things differently.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlwaysSAI
Just an update-this chapter is now THRIVING! Last time I checked their website they had 47 active sisters and chapter total on our campus is 55. So, they are doing GREAT! 
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As far as I know they are now above total, which is pretty exciting! They've even shared their recruitment success story in a past issue of the Triangle.
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Last edited by KSUViolet06; 06-09-2007 at 11:44 PM.
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