My update

[susan314]

Originally Posted by dukemama

Since my last post, I was contacted by someone affiliated with an NPC sorority that I tried (unsuccessfully) to recolonize during my undergraduate days. Since this organization is the only one to which I have a truly valid "link", it will be the only one with which I'll pursue AI if and when the time comes.

However...I am currently in a holding pattern with that group and have decided instead to investigate membership with Beta Sigma Phi. I have a tentatively scheduled meeting with some sisters in my area on 6/5, and although this particular chapter is probably not the best one for me (the average age of the membership skews higher than I would prefer) I figure it can't hurt to make some contacts.

Wish me luck!

dukemama

Good luck!

I remember your earlier story about the recolonization attempt - can't speak for all NPC groups (or even "officially" for my own)), but IMO that sounds like a good connection/inroad to get an AI pursuit off the ground. (Whether or not an invitation to join depends upon the group itself and their own policies, of course, but it sounds like a valid enough link to warrant a group getting to know you a little better.)

That said, its still good that you're keeping your options open and investigating Beta Sigma Phi. While the present average age of your local chapter might skew higher than what you were hoping for, you could be just the spark they need to draw in some members closer to your age range. After all, its always in a group's best interests to draw in some younger members too - keeps continuity and stability in the group going. (That's the problem our local alumnae chapter is going through right now - we have an extremely dedicated group of members who have been active in the alumnae club for 30 years or more. The problem is that they are ready to retire/pull back a little, and there's no one waiting in the wings to take over leadership of the group. )

And let's not forget that although the average physical age might be higher than you were looking for, you might find that this group of ladies is very young at heart and still a lot of fun! Some of my closest friends these days are 10 years older than me, but it still feels like we're all the same age. (I'm 33.)

Good luck with your efforts.

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by susan314

After all, its always in a group's best interests to draw in some younger members too - keeps continuity and stability in the group going. (That's the problem our local alumnae chapter is going through right now - we have an extremely dedicated group of members who have been active in the alumnae club for 30 years or more. The problem is that they are ready to retire/pull back a little, and there's no one waiting in the wings to take over leadership of the group. )

Thanks Susan. I quoted you above because what you describe is what has happened to a group I was previously involved with, my local chapter of AAUW (Amer. Assoc. of University Women). Many of the women there were in their 50s and older, had been there for 20 years or more and wanted to leave the more time-consuming tasks of running programs and holding officer positions to younger members, who to my knowledge have yet to materialize (I went inactive with AAUW after the 2005-6 academic year). The lack of women with whom I could "identify" as a fairly young, working mom was the major reason I left AAUW although I still support them on a national level. The other reason was more political (I didn't like the direction the group was heading in under the leadership of the president at the time).

You've given me some good food for thought. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised after I meet with the BSP sisters next week...I will say that the woman who invited me sounded about 30 years old even though she said she was 60!

[dukemama]

Unfortunately my husband was called down to DC on business that day and wasn't home in time to watch our 4-year old, so I had to take him along. Thank goodness the sister at whose house we met was very understanding -- she has a grandson the same age.

I liked the women a lot. They seem genuinely fond of each other and most of them have been together as a group for 20+ years! I left feeling that they would welcome me into their chapter, but I still think I'd fit in better with a younger group of women. Fortunately there's another chapter not far from me made up of a lot of moms with tots, and I've already exchanged several e-mails with their VP. I'll be attending a meeting with them most likely in July.

[twotimestalia]

Happy to hear you had a good time at the meeting. It can only get better. My first meeting was with members in their 30's and with kids. It was ok. The second was with older ladyies (30's, and mostly 50's+) I'm 23 and felt better with the 2nd group.

[dukemama]

Remember I said I was in a "holding pattern" with the NPC sorority with which I was planning to pursue AI? Well, no more! The president of the alumnae association in my area sent me an e-mail today and wants me to come to one of her group's meetings. WOW! Now I might soon be involved with BSP AND this sorority...would it be a bad idea to pursue both at once?

[Denise_DPhiE]

Originally Posted by dukemama

Remember I said I was in a "holding pattern" with the NPC sorority with which I was planning to pursue AI? Well, no more! The president of the alumnae association in my area sent me an e-mail today and wants me to come to one of her group's meetings. WOW! Now I might soon be involved with BSP AND this sorority...would it be a bad idea to pursue both at once?

I would suggest doing one at a time. The goals might overlap and you might be spread too thin. Do what your heart tells you! Be sure to ask what the reqs of AI membership in the NPC group are including time, monetary etc.

[dukemama]

Thanks Denise. I haven't gotten further than the e-mail contact stage with both groups so as of now I'm not experiencing any conflicts. But I certainly see how that could happen.

I am definitely meeting with the BSP chapter next month, which is kind of unusual because many of the other chapters I've been in touch with break for the summer. Don't know if the NPC sorority's alumnae group works on that kind of schedule but I hope to have at least one "fact-finding" meeting with them before the end of the summer. Time commitment and financial considerations will absolutely be taken into account since I am a SAHM to a four-year old!

[susan314]

Originally Posted by Denise_DPhiE

I would suggest doing one at a time. The goals might overlap and you might be spread too thin. Do what your heart tells you! Be sure to ask what the reqs of AI membership in the NPC group are including time, monetary etc.

I would agree that one at a time would be the best way to go - you don't want to shortchange yourself or the organization! For the long term, you could potentially join both BSP and an NPC group. However, its not necessarily something you'd want to do all at once.

I don't think there's anything wrong with meeting women from both organizations at least one time - after all, how can you decide which group "feels right" to you, if you don't meet women from both organizations? Of course, I'd recommend against stringing a group along if you started to feel a strong preference for the other!